Why do marriages have to be arranged by anyone except God (if we are Christians that is)? He is the only match maker I would ever want to use. We have to remember that the majority of arranged marriages are done by non Christian's.
What gives me as a parent the right to think that I know who will be best for my children? The choice is theirs with Gods leading. I pray about it, but that is where my input needs to end.
People are usually chosen for children because they have money or a 'good' family or prestige and many times the children have little say even if they really don't want to do it. There are many many pressures to conform in such families.
There are so many parents that cant even be good parents, so how they think they could chose the right marriage partner in beyond me.
First let me be clear Im not raging in endoresement of arranged marriage BUT If I think this through I see a lot more merit in the process I described than in what you are.
Sure as adults we should be free to make decsions...but give me a break if you are suggesting that because Im 21, 0r 25 I can make WISE decisions based on age. The amalgam of the years of experience of all those folks involved is HUGE. That both families deeply love the one from their side and want whats best is HUGE. I think there is a major benefit to bringing that generational wisdom AND built in heavy investment of those families into the marriage.
Why is it mutually exclusive anyway? Why can God not be involved in the arranged marriage? I mean, here in the west people get married after, even the conservative ones, a couple years of knowing each other, often the extended families NEVER meet, and are 1000's of miles apart, and we "FEEL" good with the person, pray, and decide to marry, never entertaining the fact that we are VERY prone to feelings overriding Holy Spirit nudges..it happens, why not in this area?
Finally, the Bible speaks clearly about wisdom gleaned from experience, wisdom in multiple counselors, it supports the tenets of the arranged marriage thing very strongly. If as dallas says the 2 know each other and have some input, bringing all that wisdom to bear is a HUGE benefit. Dont compare , say, Arabic countries and major oppression (or Afganistan..read "1000 Splendid Suns" to see how that works) to what I described in India.
Thats what I dont get.Why is it that if its arranged after many wise people who know and love both children and the children(I mean children not in a minor since) meet and agree to marry why you would assume that had nothing to do with God being involved?
And saying many arranged marriages are "terrible" is a moot point because so are many non arranged marriages.
And lets be honest here.When you say Gods leading you are referring to your feelings about the other person.God does not jump down and say.."this is the one"..you feel it.Why can not an arranged couple "feel" that they are right for each other just because they were initially "picked" by the families ?
And also Im with Blah Blah as well as Im not inisnuating everyone should be married this way.I just will not agree that under any circumstances its wrong or that God has no hand in it.