You are not being sick or selfish to "mourn" what you are losing, even though it seems for the best that y'all move. It's normal and natural and probably necessary to go thru a mourning process when dear people and dear patterns are going to be put out of reach. Or at least made harder to reach.
I moved over 1,000 miles away from "Home" and family because of the "Oil Bust" of the 1980's.
Closest family was Mike's paternal grandma and one paternal aunt and her family about 2 hours away, and we didn't see them often because we didn't always have the time (work) or transportation for it.
We left behind old folks and familiar lands, communities, events, schools, churches. My paternal grandfather died while I was up there -- I wasn't able to come "down home" to help my grandmother in his final illness, I couldn't even make the funeral.
I never really settled in there fully -- I even went so far as to realize that down here in Louisiana, should "the worst" happen and I find myself and my children homeless and hungry -- I know what is edible in the swamps! I know the slow-moving animals and I know how to build a little house of palmetto thatch! Up there in the Midwest I didn't know all that stuff.
But on the other side of the coin, I made some lifelong church friends up there. I discovered a very nice little city with all sorts of cultural stuff going on, some of it similar to Home and thus comforting, and some of it all exotically different and fun to take part in. I delivered my fourth child up there and at least brought him back with me when I returned -- see, there was some
profit in the move!
I guess what I am trying to say is this -- we have a lot of technology at our command to maintain all sorts of contacts with loved ones we can't see every day. We also can save up and make arrangements to go and see them on a fairly regular basis, when we live as close as you will.
So do not despair because of the move.
See what you can do to find the beauty of place, of people, in the community where you're going.
One thing I wish for you is that your husband begin to learn that a woman usually just wants to be held and commiserated with when she feels like you do -- you weren't asking for him to solve your problems or make it suddenly all better, so he needn't have felt threatened or alone because he was powerless to help you -- or that you needed to catch a grip -- or whatever was in his head that made him react to you that way.
And isn't it awful
, the way we let stuff slide around the house, we always let the "urgent" outweigh the "important", so that when it comes time for important company in the home, or when it comes time to move away, then
we flurry around fixing all those "honey-do's"!