My husband is an alcoholic. He is now on anti-abuse that will make him ill if he drinks. its either that or marriage will not survive. he will not seek out help via other means of support. . my last straw was in july. He has a friend he used to drink with all the time at my house in the yard, as recently as in July while I was at work. This friend even allows him to drive drunk. In July the last straw I had when I had this feeling this guy was over at my house and him and my husband were drinking. I came home unannounced. both of them sitting outside drinking and drinking heavily. I did not say a word. stayed quiet until I heard my husband start the car with his friend in it, I ran out told my husband "you are not driving anywhere and took the keys" my husband then hot wired the car and proceeded to try to drive drunk again. they both were very intoxicated. Again I ran out and stated you are not driving anywhere.. His friend goes "oh I am just trying to get home" I told his friend "friend does not allow friends to drive drunk". Luckily boss came and saved the day and they drove my husband's friend home. (he already had a pending dui from taking this friend home) praise God, that was dismissed, which was a miracle. This friend has no car, drinks around the clock, pint or more of liquor a day. (per my husband's word's) lives in a literal shack with some other person who also drinks.
My husband is on anti-abuse, so if he drinks it will make him really ill. its either that or I don't think my marriage will survive... My husband still hangs around this person. Even though my husband is on anti-abuse I am still uncomfortable my husband still hangs around him. The reason is, I don't know if this person smokes marijuana or takes pills to get high. I know he is a heavy drinker. my husband has first said he doesn't smoke pot, and then another day he says "I don't know if he does or not" I don't really know if my husband is indulging in this in place of alcohol, since he cant drink. My husband says , "oh just because I am not drinking doesn't mean I am going to abandon him as a friend" Well most sensible people I have talked to, if we drop things like drugs and alcohol, we can still care for the friend who is still using, but most people I have ever talked to don't put themselves in that environment. I love my husband's friend soul, but my husband is not living the Godly life and he is not befriending this other person to ask him to come to church or try to help him out of the lifestyle. He feels its ok to hang out with him. my husband feels its ok since he is no antiabuse. this friend is a heavy, heavy drinker and I don't really like my husband hanging around him, (unless of course he is trying to encourage him to get out of that lifestyle.
Someone please give me some Godly wisdom on what to try to say to my husband about hanging asround people that are not good for him. Maybe I am missing something here. I do my best to talk with him in grace , but last night I was more firm about it. Why does he keep doing it? I find I am starting to get angry about it inside, because I feel my husband keeps breaking boundaries. I don't know what to say to enforce boundaries. I feel like these type of boundaries are not enforceable. I had told my husband to not go and pick him up and bring him to house to help my husband outside and says it is work related. he has broken that boundary and still doing "guy" things with him. am I wrong for not wanting my husband to hang around people who drink heavily ? He trys to manipulate me like I just have a suspicious mind. Yes my mind is suspicious. Because in some ways my husband has lied to me so many times, and his trust has to be earned. These two have a past together. They always drinked heavily together.