I have sinned against God and my husband. I will write out the whole truth here.. I got married to my husband in June 2013 and went to school the following year for 3 months. I developed serious feelings for my lab partner and turned to my husband to confess.
I lied about who it was to hopefully keep in some sort of contact with this other man. We exchanged a few messages around that time but nothing flirty. On the last day of school it was very hard to say goodbye to him. After my husband and I spoke about my feelings for this other man, we decided to work on our marriage and stay together.
It has been 6 years and i contacted this man again to go for coffee and catch up with my husband's consent. I always had this other man in the back of my brain. My husband trusted me and upon meeting with this man again, I realized the sparks were still very much there and he confessed he felt the same way.
I contacted him once a month to chat after that and within the last month, we've been chatting on and off. I ended up going to his house one day and we kissed(passionately) and stayed half clothed.
I have confessed to my husband what I have done and cut communication with the other man. Now I don't know what to do. I have made a grave mistake. I am seeking God and begging for repentance. I believe my husband would be willing to take marriage counselling with me.
My marriage is lacking when it comes to passion and intimacy and I don't know If that is all I was seeking(wrongfully) to fill or what.. I am praying that God erases the feelings and memories I have with this other man because they always creep into my mind. Please help