MY HUSBAND CALLED ME UGLY

[pureNheart]

It hurts like a knife.

It's true.  I used to be very pretty, but, I became very ill, ( I almost died), and seemed to have lost my looks.
We had gotten into a huge argument and asked me, "Have you looked at yourself in the mirror lately?"  I was stunned.  He also told me that my behind was sagging, my chest was too small and critisized my personality.  He said that there was something about me that was repulsive to people:(

He also admitted that he in the past, he used my body to pretend that he was with someone else when we were getting physical.

During altercations, he has spit in my face, knocked my down, locked my out of our house because he thought that I had not put my disability check in the bank.  When he found out that the bank made a mistake, he said that, "Well, sometimes, you accuse me fausly too."

Once when we got into an argument, I got angry and threw the phone at the wall.  He called the police on me.  When they arrived, he went into the bedroom.  I had to let them in and explain to them that I had not did anything physical to him.  He then cam

I've been called every name in the book

I have no one to talk to about this.  I went to a Christian counselor who wasn't very effective.  When I would say something, her reply would be, "That's not very nice."  At the time, our church has no pastor. 

My husband is extremely attractive.  Not only that, but, he is quite charming, funny, smart, and a very nice person, (in public).

He says that he is a Christian and has been born again.  He's a deacon in our church and is well respected.  Everywhere he goes, people always ask him is he is a minister. 

[farouk]

The Epistle to the Philippians is a good one to read, when we need our attention turned Godward, through difficulties.

Take care.

[lightshineon]

 jerk, sorry, but b-hole jerk. Is that all a woman is worth is her looks? I am sure honey you are still a looker, he has just played mean, ugly tapes in your head. Time for this Loser to go.

[pureNheart]

I'm so glad that you responded to my post.

I have no family and since I have become sick, I don't have many friends left.

So, again, thank you for giving me that helpful advice.

I'll read it before I go to bed tonight.

[farouk]

YW.

And you know, we all have to answer to the Lord, so need to keep looking up, despite hurtful events.

Take care.

I'm so glad that you responded to my post.

I have no family and since I have become sick, I don't have many friends left.

So, again, thank you for giving me that helpful advice.

I'll read it before I go to bed tonight.

[lightshineon]

YW.

And you know, we all have to answer to the Lord, so need to keep looking up, despite hurtful events.

Take care.

I'm so glad that you responded to my post.

I have no family and since I have become sick, I don't have many friends left.

So, again, thank you for giving me that helpful advice.

I'll read it before I go to bed tonight.

This is true Mr. F, as will her husband, my goodness is this the Islam faith where a man can abuse a woman? He sounds so hateful, and cruel to her. I would not want to be called ugly, how wounding to the spirit. God sees, honey, and he is always looking to see injustice towards those who hurt victims.

[pureNheart]

Thank you lightsineon.

No, he isn't a Muslim.  He says that he is saved.  He reads his Bible daily, knows quite a bit of the Word, and is highly respected in our church as a Deacon.  They've even considered asking him to teach our Bible Class until we get another pastor.

I know that The Lord knows how much that we can bear.  But, somtimes I feel as if I'm gonna lose it.

Please pray for my strength.

[farouk]

In any case, ladies, let's deal with individual cases, whatever the individuals profess. The Lord sees the heart. (He sees mine, which is the biggest challenge.)

[lightshineon]

In any case, ladies, let's deal with individual cases, whatever the individuals profess. The Lord sees the heart. (He sees mine, which is the biggest challenge.)

 Meaning Mr. F, she takes abuse in the name of Jesus?

[farouk]

Ms light:

To say that what he is doing is somehow right? far from it! But we all need to keep our hearts in a Godward direction, praying for strength day by day, and not "stand on our rights" all the time, which is not healthy spiritually.

Take care.

In any case, ladies, let's deal with individual cases, whatever the individuals profess. The Lord sees the heart. (He sees mine, which is the biggest challenge.)

 Meaning Mr. F, she takes abuse in the name of Jesus?

[lightshineon]

Ms light:

To say that what he is doing is somehow right? far from it! But we all need to keep our hearts in a Godward direction, praying for strength day by day, and not "stand on our rights" all the time, which is not healthy spiritually.

Take care.

In any case, ladies, let's deal with individual cases, whatever the individuals profess. The Lord sees the heart. (He sees mine, which is the biggest challenge.)

 Meaning Mr. F, she takes abuse in the name of Jesus?

 Sorry, it is not about her and her rights, it is about him abusing her, and acting holy. Jesus did not die for us to be captive to the devil. 

[ConqueredbyLove]

Thank you lightsineon.

No, he isn't a Muslim.  He says that he is saved.  He reads his Bible daily, knows quite a bit of the Word, and is highly respected in our church as a Deacon.  They've even considered asking him to teach our Bible Class until we get another pastor.

I know that The Lord knows how much that we can bear.  But, somtimes I feel as if I'm gonna lose it.

Please pray for my strength.

Sweetheart,

You are being abused...And my heart weeps for you.  Yes, I will be praying for you.  What you are going through is horrendous and Jesus weeps for you and with you.

I just want you to know you are not alone.  Many of us have been there or are going through something similiar now....

You don't deserve this, nor is this your fault....Your husband is sinning greatly against you and God is not pleased no matter what your church thinks about him.  God sees behind those closed doors and sees every mean, cruel word your husband has spoken to you.

I am sooo sorry, dear, precious soul....I am sooo sad for you....

[farouk]

Ms light:

It is very bad indeed, I know.

But I don't agree with urging angry reaction.

Rather, we all have a Godward duty, and in any case the Bible says in 1 Cor. 7 that the unbelieving husband can be won over by the wife's Godly example, instead of her anger and her reaction.

Ms light:

To say that what he is doing is somehow right? far from it! But we all need to keep our hearts in a Godward direction, praying for strength day by day, and not "stand on our rights" all the time, which is not healthy spiritually.

Take care.

In any case, ladies, let's deal with individual cases, whatever the individuals profess. The Lord sees the heart. (He sees mine, which is the biggest challenge.)

 Meaning Mr. F, she takes abuse in the name of Jesus?

 Sorry, it is not about her and her rights, it is about him abusing her, and acting holy. Jesus did not die for us to be captive to the devil. 

[pureNheart]

Conquered, your post brought tears to eyes.

Thank you for feeling my pain.  I do know that the only way that I have been able to make it is because of my Lord and Savior Jesus Christ.

[Bocephus]

jerk, sorry, but b-hole jerk. Is that all a woman is worth is her looks? I am sure honey you are still a looker, he has just played mean, ugly tapes in your head. Time for this Loser to go.

I don't know the poster or the poster's husband.  It's hard to judge in a circumstance like this because I don't know the whole story, just what I've read in the post.

I would suggest rather than name calling, the poster needs to talk to someone at her congregation or a good Christian counselor.  PureNHeart doesn't need a pity party, or folks to tell her that her husband is a jerk.  She needs help, and unfortunately, other than pointing towards those that can help in the real world, you can't get your problems solved on a message board.

Please see another Christian counselor, one who is grounded in God's Word.