Update my verdict: Almost 4..5 weeks in had big talk tonight about our future. But first my verdict on the 180 I would say an (A-) highly recommened it. Pros about the 180 that no one hardly mentions and I can see personally changes myself "self-discipline". By not reaching out during that time and staying focus on myself once you get to day 8,9,10 you mind gets out of a loop of the repetiveness. When you get to week it seems like your life hits a reset button. Sure your will have moments when negative thoughts "marriage conflicts" runs thru your mind but you really see yourself day by day not letting it consume ya. Less and less fustration as the days go by and more and more self-control. I think this is a plus.
We had the big talk tonight so did the 180 work on her? It's really hard to pin point it. She seemed pretty sure she is done and thats it. But that is what I expected so I disn't go into panic mode just acted as calm as can be. I kinda probed her about us the future kinda got resistance at first but I slowly just paced myself with questions about us. Here's a few things that stuck out she told me the day before she left If I talked her into staying she might not of left. Second thing she seemed kinda open to casual hanging out. But I understand women they say their done but it's based on emotions not reality. I'm kinda a clever guy anyways and I know this stuff. Now you may think did the 180 make a diffence? well what would of happened if I pursue her too much daily "talking about the day she left till now" convince her, begged, pleaded, text, promise to change etc. Personally this has failure written all over it from the start. I really see this I guess odds from here on out 50/50. I really do believe things are not set in stone when someone says it's done. From here on out my stbx or maybe not stbx has plan A or plan B. Plan A is the road to divorce or plan B which is me. My plan isbto make plan B look more appealing without begging her to come back. Look confident, act confident, be cheerful, be helpful, etc. Slowly the tides will turn this is my game plan and if does end I be ok knowing I did my best course of action I could possibly take.