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Author Topic: Things you don't say to your wife if you want to live a long and happy life...  (Read 9993 times)
spurly
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« on: August 06, 2008, 08:02:40 AM »
These are the things you don't say to your wife...
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He was despised and forsaken of men, a man of sorrows and acquainted with grief; like one from whom men hide their face; He was despised, and we did not esteem Him.  Surely our griefs He Himself bore, and our sorrows He carried; yet we ourselves esteemed Him stricken, smitten of God, and afflicted.  But He was pierced through for our transgressions, He was crushed for our iniquities; the chastening for our well-being fell upon Him, and by His scourging we are healed.
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« on: August 06, 2008, 08:02:40 AM »
 
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James.
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« Reply #1 on: August 06, 2008, 08:50:09 AM »
 Laughing histerically
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"Now may the God of peace himself sanctify you completely, and may your whole spirit and soul and body be kept blameless at the coming of our Lord Jesus Christ.  He who calls you is faithful; he will surely do it."
– 1st Thess. 5:23-24 ESV

"God’s will to save is as wide as His will to create."
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« Reply #1 on: August 06, 2008, 08:50:09 AM »
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Charles Sloan
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« Reply #2 on: August 06, 2008, 09:17:09 AM »
Tim Hawkins is great, I would recommend his entire act.
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Blessed is every one that feareth the LORD; that walketh in his ways.
For thou shalt eat the labour of thine hands: happy shalt thou be, and it shall be well with thee.
Thy wife shall be as a fruitful vine by the sides of thine house: thy children like olive plants round about thy table.
Behold, that thus shall the man be blessed that feareth the LORD.
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« Reply #3 on: August 06, 2008, 10:22:59 AM »
You gave me my laugh for the day.  Thanks!   Laughing at quote
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« Reply #3 on: August 06, 2008, 10:22:59 AM »
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gracex2
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« Reply #4 on: August 06, 2008, 01:10:46 PM »
This is awesome! I love Tim Hawkins!
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poohgirl
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« Reply #5 on: August 09, 2008, 12:54:18 PM »
 Applause    Very funny.  Rolling on floor laughing
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« Reply #5 on: August 09, 2008, 12:54:18 PM »
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BondServant
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« Reply #6 on: August 09, 2008, 04:24:51 PM »
spurly, that is GREAT!!

Thanks!!!

In Christ,
KP
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My prayer is not for them alone.  I pray also for those who will believe in me through their message, that all of them may be one...  -- John 17:20-21

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Hehealedme
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« Reply #7 on: August 19, 2008, 01:24:32 PM »
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Things you don't say to your wife if you want to live a long and happy life...




I have personally been told that one:

Stop complaining, giving birth can't possibly hurt that much...  Doh! Banging head against wall
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leeford
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« Reply #8 on: February 15, 2009, 05:40:27 PM »
Tim Hawkins lyrics to "Things You Don't Say to Your Wife" are very funny! I wish he'd keep going.
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« Reply #8 on: February 15, 2009, 05:40:27 PM »
 
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kensington
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« Reply #9 on: February 15, 2009, 09:24:21 PM »
That is too funny. 
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« Reply #9 on: February 15, 2009, 09:24:21 PM »
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fanuvmxpx
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« Reply #10 on: February 17, 2009, 03:35:48 PM »
My favorite was the birthday present  Rolling
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« Reply #11 on: May 04, 2009, 07:45:28 PM »
Get your wife a new vacuum cleaner for Mother's Day, and she will just love you to pieces.
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« Reply #11 on: May 04, 2009, 07:45:28 PM »
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courtgirl72
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« Reply #12 on: May 04, 2009, 09:34:46 PM »
Quote from: Hehealedme on August 19, 2008, 01:24:32 PM
Quote
Things you don't say to your wife if you want to live a long and happy life...




I have personally been told that one:

Stop complaining, giving birth can't possibly hurt that much...  Doh! Banging head against wall


How long did he have to stay in the hospital?
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« Reply #12 on: May 04, 2009, 09:34:46 PM »
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chosenone
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« Reply #13 on: May 04, 2009, 09:59:13 PM »
Quote from: Gary on May 04, 2009, 07:45:28 PM
Get your wife a new vacuum cleaner for Mother's Day, and she will just love you to pieces.


 whats wrong with a new vacuum cleaner?mind you I am not his mum so wouldnt expect anything from hubby for mothers day, that is for my own children to think about.
Mind you I got some new rechargable gardening shears for my birthday and it was what I asked for. (I am very easy to please).
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« Reply #14 on: May 04, 2009, 10:15:45 PM »
Quote from: courtgirl72 on May 04, 2009, 09:34:46 PM
Quote from: Hehealedme on August 19, 2008, 01:24:32 PM
Quote
Things you don't say to your wife if you want to live a long and happy life...




I have personally been told that one:

Stop complaining, giving birth can't possibly hurt that much...  Doh! Banging head against wall


How long did he have to stay in the hospital?



You must mean in the same room as I was, not in the hospital...you want the truth?...ok, here goes...if I (his wife and mother of his first child) had had the strenght to get up that day between the contractions, I would have smacked him one between his eyes for sure that would have kept him in the hospital for as many days as I had to stay there myself!...but instead, I started screaming telling him to get out of the room. Two nurses then came in, asked him to get out of the room, then they stayed with me and helped me go through the contractions until I was given only very mild morphine until the doctor decided to make me have an emergency cesarean...our daughter was stuck, she couldn't get out through the birth canal and her heartbeat was dangerously in distress...we could easily have lost her... Crying and sad.
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