Author Topic: Women listen up silent treatment is abuse!!  (Read 2672 times)

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Offline planetshaker

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Women listen up silent treatment is abuse!!
« on: Sun Jul 30, 2017 - 01:23:02 »
So i got fed up the other day and told my wife we need to  on our marriage or get a divorce. I'm not going to just drag this out any longer. I'm tired of her silent treatment constant put downs etc, etc. I've come to the conclusion that marriage is and is not. Marriage is the willingness on both parties ti make it work. It is not some kinda award or trophy cause you been married xx mount of years. A marriage is not a ring on  finger or names on a document. Nor is it entitlements or social status. It is 100% effort not 99 or 50 or 75 it's 100 percent or you are a fraud. Does that mean you have to be perfect no. I'm not and will not have my spouse sit on my marriage and think it will be ok No!! I drew the line and laid it out there we will work on this marriage or get a divorce. Marriage is a union yes but it's not a labor union and you can just go on strike and give me the silent treatment. Oh yeah it goes on for months and months hatred, criticism and silent treatment. I'm mental broken i will not live like this nor does my daughter deserve this either. You proved your freakin point I'm not fit to be in your life. But why drag this out? You have no where to go? Well after the divorce is final i pat you on your back and hope you well. But thinking you can drag this out for years until until such and such or whatever forget it. Marriage is not based on fraud if you don't love me leave and get a divorce it's that simple. If you wanna stay we have to get help and counceling bottom line and i will not negotiate. We have to love 100 percent now that is marriage.

So to the ladies out there you gotta understand that silent tratment is lethal in marriage as bad as a nuclear weapon is in warfare. You don't understand cause it seems petty and insignificant but i can assure you it is leathal and very damaging worse than being cheated on. I rather walk on broken glass than have my wife ex communicate with me. Women please stop this it only cause a bad siuation to be a worse on. A day or two years ok... Months years?? No. You are just moving closer to the end of the marriage. If you want to make your marriage work or just want to be civil please aviod this just like americans wanted aviod hilliary to be president.

On a scale of 1-10 silent treatment is a 10+ nuclear assault that would end a marriage faster than atlanta falcons blowing a superbowl.

Sure im going to get some slack on this from women but why?? Why are you still under the aame roof with a guy you cant stand leave get a divorce at least that will shake things up and get his attention. But the silent treatment is the nail in the coffin game over. When it happens to us reconciling is nezt to impossible. It is contempt to the uttermost disrespect. It is probably in womens nature to do this but it iss the worst thing to do with the worst outcome.

Maybe im not asking for advice this is more to help women understand you cant do this aviod it period. Im saying this to beneficial to help your marriage if you wanna divorce 0 to 60 in 2.3 seconds give the silent treatment a go and call me in 6 years and tell me how things went.

Just a piece of advise to help others you may agree or disagree with me but this is the truth.

Silent treatment kills marriages

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Women listen up silent treatment is abuse!!
« on: Sun Jul 30, 2017 - 01:23:02 »

Offline mommydi

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Re: Women listen up silent treatment is abuse!!
« Reply #1 on: Sun Jul 30, 2017 - 09:01:47 »


Sure im going to get some slack on this from women but why?? ...

The only "slack" I'm going to give you is for being a little sexist.  ::smile::

Quote
Maybe im not asking for advice this is more to help women understand you cant do this aviod it period.

You do realize that husbands/men can also be quite skilled at using the silent treatment? The silent treatment is definitely not limited to females.

Otherwise, you're right. It's emotional manipulation, emotional abuse, and causes anxiety and depression to the person on the receiving end. We're not talking about an hour or two, or even a day or so of silence/ignoring. We're talking weeks, months, years, decades, even a lifetime. The silent treatment is used to take control, be in control, and stay in control. Like you mentioned, long-term silent treatment tells the partner they are unworthy of acknowledgement and their life doesn't matter. A horrendous form of abuse - without lifting a finger and without uttering a word.

If you don't mind, may I ask you something?
Does she -
1. Cycle between silent treatment and loving/caring treatment.
2. Cycle between silent treatment and outbursts of anger. (That's a fun one  ::frown::)
3. Stays continually in silent treatment mode.


Quote
Silent treatment kills marriages

100% in agreement.

Offline MeMyself

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Re: Women listen up silent treatment is abuse!!
« Reply #2 on: Sun Jul 30, 2017 - 09:17:59 »
Im sorry, Planetshaker.  That is a terrible thing to have to live with.  To be shunned by your own spouse, made to feel invisible and insignificant and unworthy of common courtesy of even being spoken to is mentally and emotionally abusive.

God bless you and may you find comfort in Him.   

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Re: Women listen up silent treatment is abuse!!
« Reply #2 on: Sun Jul 30, 2017 - 09:17:59 »

Offline chosenone

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Re: Women listen up silent treatment is abuse!!
« Reply #3 on: Wed Aug 02, 2017 - 19:48:48 »
No it's not in most women's nature to do this, in fact, my family experienced this many many years ago from a male member of the family, so it's not a male/female thing.  It's a very controlling manipulative thing.
You say why doesn't she end the marriage, well you may need to make that decision for yourself.
« Last Edit: Wed Aug 02, 2017 - 19:54:36 by chosenone »

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Re: Women listen up silent treatment is abuse!!
« Reply #3 on: Wed Aug 02, 2017 - 19:48:48 »

Offline Yahu

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Re: Women listen up silent treatment is abuse!!
« Reply #4 on: Thu Aug 10, 2017 - 11:24:41 »
Silent treatment kills marriages
Actually any form of punishment by a wife towards her husband is WRONG.

It comes from a misunderstanding of authority.  Punishment ALWAYS flows from someone in authority to an individual under their authority.  A wife is NEVER an authority over her husband but commanded to submit to him.  Just as a child is not allowed to punish a parent when they don't get their way, a wife is NEVER allowed to punish a husband.  You can ONLY refuse an authority over you IF they command the breaking of a higher law.  The scriptural example is the order to bow to the golden image of king.  It violated Yah's law.

Scripture states that 'rebellion is as the sin of witchcraft'.  Rebellion is rejection of a valid authority whereas the root of witchcraft is usurping false authority over something.  They are flip sides of the same coin so to speak.  A wife that refuses to submit to her husband's decision is in rebellion.  If she tries to impose her will over her husband, it is witchcraft.

Punishment for failure to submit to a wife's desire is a means to usurp false authority.

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Re: Women listen up silent treatment is abuse!!
« Reply #4 on: Thu Aug 10, 2017 - 11:24:41 »



Offline mommydi

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Re: Women listen up silent treatment is abuse!!
« Reply #5 on: Thu Aug 10, 2017 - 13:18:32 »
Actually any form of punishment by a wife towards her husband is WRONG.

It comes from a misunderstanding of authority.  Punishment ALWAYS flows from someone in authority to an individual under their authority.  A wife is NEVER an authority over her husband but commanded to submit to him.  Just as a child is not allowed to punish a parent when they don't get their way, a wife is NEVER allowed to punish a husband.  You can ONLY refuse an authority over you IF they command the breaking of a higher law.  The scriptural example is the order to bow to the golden image of king.  It violated Yah's law.

Scripture states that 'rebellion is as the sin of witchcraft'.  Rebellion is rejection of a valid authority whereas the root of witchcraft is usurping false authority over something.  They are flip sides of the same coin so to speak.  A wife that refuses to submit to her husband's decision is in rebellion.  If she tries to impose her will over her husband, it is witchcraft.

Punishment for failure to submit to a wife's desire is a means to usurp false authority.

Interesting.

So since you say punishment should never be dealt from bottom up, but top down, you're saying husbands should punish their wives? If so, what sort of punishment is acceptable - scripturally speaking.

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Re: Women listen up silent treatment is abuse!!
« Reply #5 on: Thu Aug 10, 2017 - 13:18:32 »

Offline MeMyself

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Re: Women listen up silent treatment is abuse!!
« Reply #6 on: Thu Aug 10, 2017 - 14:15:53 »
Actually any form of punishment by a wife towards her husband is WRONG.

It comes from a misunderstanding of authority.  Punishment ALWAYS flows from someone in authority to an individual under their authority.  A wife is NEVER an authority over her husband but commanded to submit to him.  Just as a child is not allowed to punish a parent when they don't get their way, a wife is NEVER allowed to punish a husband.  You can ONLY refuse an authority over you IF they command the breaking of a higher law.  The scriptural example is the order to bow to the golden image of king.  It violated Yah's law.

Scripture states that 'rebellion is as the sin of witchcraft'.  Rebellion is rejection of a valid authority whereas the root of witchcraft is usurping false authority over something.  They are flip sides of the same coin so to speak.  A wife that refuses to submit to her husband's decision is in rebellion.  If she tries to impose her will over her husband, it is witchcraft.

Punishment for failure to submit to a wife's desire is a means to usurp false authority.

My goodness.

What a way to describe marriage.

Frightening.  Truly.

A husbands authority should mirror that of God's towards him.  Any punishment God has doled out to him, he then should feel the freedom to dole out to the 'rebellious' wife.  Me thinks, however, that God is far more merciful to a man in rebellion than a husband who is all about his authority and his right to punish his wife often is.  Why do so many men who are puffed up by the idea of their authority forget that, I wonder?  They just like to go on and on about the rules for a wife and how the husband is in his right to respond; forgetting God's mercy lavished upon them over and over again...

But, I'm just a woman *and* a wife.  ::shrug:: What can *I* possibly know?  ::frown:: ::eatingpopcorn:

Offline Texas Conservative

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Re: Women listen up silent treatment is abuse!!
« Reply #7 on: Thu Aug 10, 2017 - 14:18:30 »
My goodness.

What a way to describe marriage.

Frightening.  Truly.

A husbands authority should mirror that of God's towards him.  Any punishment God has doled out to him, he then should feel the freedom to dole out to the 'rebellious' wife.  Me thinks, however, that God is far more merciful to a man in rebellion than a husband who is all about his authority and his right to punish his wife often is.  Why do so many men who are puffed up by the idea of their authority forget that, I wonder?  They just like to go on and on about the rules for a wife and how the husband is in his right to respond; forgetting God's mercy lavished upon them over and over again...

But, I'm just a woman *and* a wife.  ::shrug:: What can *I* possibly know?  ::frown:: ::eatingpopcorn:

Cheer up!  I bet both you and mommydi can make a great sandwich.

Offline MeMyself

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Re: Women listen up silent treatment is abuse!!
« Reply #8 on: Thu Aug 10, 2017 - 14:20:57 »
Cheer up!  I bet both you and mommydi can make a great sandwich.

Oh, man, TC! You better believe it! I just got done horkin' down a doozie that I made with my very own paws!!! 

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Re: Women listen up silent treatment is abuse!!
« Reply #8 on: Thu Aug 10, 2017 - 14:20:57 »

Offline mommydi

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Re: Women listen up silent treatment is abuse!!
« Reply #9 on: Thu Aug 10, 2017 - 14:25:42 »
Cheer up!  I bet both you and mommydi can make a great sandwich.


Of course, we do. We're women.

I'm going to make more BLTs tonight with my own tomatoes that I grew myself.

Which reminds me of this song-

Small | Large
« Last Edit: Thu Aug 10, 2017 - 14:28:03 by mommydi »

Offline Yahu

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Re: Women listen up silent treatment is abuse!!
« Reply #10 on: Thu Aug 10, 2017 - 18:36:07 »
Interesting.

So since you say punishment should never be dealt from bottom up, but top down, you're saying husbands should punish their wives? If so, what sort of punishment is acceptable - scripturally speaking.
A husband is also commanded to 'love his wife'.  Having the right of punishment does not imply USING that right just because you can.

I Co 13:4  Charity suffereth long, and is kind; charity envieth not; charity vaunteth not itself, is not puffed up,
5  Doth not behave itself unseemly, seeketh not her own, is not easily provoked, thinketh no evil;
6  Rejoiceth not in iniquity, but rejoiceth in the truth;
7  Beareth all things, believeth all things, hopeth all things, endureth all things.

That is the role of a husband towards his wife.

Offline mommydi

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Re: Women listen up silent treatment is abuse!!
« Reply #11 on: Thu Aug 10, 2017 - 20:08:45 »
A husband is also commanded to 'love his wife'.  Having the right of punishment does not imply USING that right just because you can.

I Co 13:4  Charity suffereth long, and is kind; charity envieth not; charity vaunteth not itself, is not puffed up,
5  Doth not behave itself unseemly, seeketh not her own, is not easily provoked, thinketh no evil;
6  Rejoiceth not in iniquity, but rejoiceth in the truth;
7  Beareth all things, believeth all things, hopeth all things, endureth all things.

That is the role of a husband towards his wife.

OK, but earlier you were talking about punishment. What kind of punishment is scriptural and authorized for a husband to use on his wife?

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Re: Women listen up silent treatment is abuse!!
« Reply #12 on: Fri Aug 11, 2017 - 07:12:09 »
Actually any form of punishment by a wife towards her husband is WRONG.

It comes from a misunderstanding of authority.  Punishment ALWAYS flows from someone in authority to an individual under their authority.  A wife is NEVER an authority over her husband but commanded to submit to him.  Just as a child is not allowed to punish a parent when they don't get their way, a wife is NEVER allowed to punish a husband. 

Scripture states that 'rebellion is as the sin of witchcraft'.  Rebellion is rejection of a valid authority

Punishment for failure to submit to a wife's desire is a means to usurp false authority.

Exactly how long have you been married?

Actually any form of punishment by a wife towards her husband is WRONG.

That would include a wife filing for divorce , if he did not want it, after her husband

# 1 was found to have been sexually unfaithful toward her.

OR

#2 Was physically abusive toward her. (IE beating and the occasional tossing down the stairs)

OR

#3 Abuse of any kind toward the children

OR

#4. the demand that she have an abortion

By your calculations she would have to suffer it out or be wrongly in rebellion.

Scripture states that 'rebellion is as the sin of witchcraft'.  Rebellion is rejection of a valid authority

This should apply to about 50% of the US population who are in open disagreement with the authority of the President of the US.

Perhaps we should start a Salem Witch trial nationwide.... anew?

Punishment for failure to submit to a wife's desire is a means to usurp false authority.

More accurately, cutting your own nose off




Offline Yahu

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Re: Women listen up silent treatment is abuse!!
« Reply #13 on: Fri Aug 11, 2017 - 11:02:46 »
OK, but earlier you were talking about punishment. What kind of punishment is scriptural and authorized for a husband to use on his wife?
You are missing the entire point.  It is WRONG for a wife to punish a husband in any way.  I have said NOTHING advocating a husband punishing a wife.  I state that a wife punishing a husband is the same as a child punishing their parent.

Offline mommydi

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Re: Women listen up silent treatment is abuse!!
« Reply #14 on: Fri Aug 11, 2017 - 11:21:56 »
You are missing the entire point.  It is WRONG for a wife to punish a husband in any way.  I have said NOTHING advocating a husband punishing a wife.  I state that a wife punishing a husband is the same as a child punishing their parent.

No, I'm not missing the point.  ::smile::

I get that you say it's "WRONG" for a wife to punish a husband, but you posted that a husband has a "right" to punish the wife. I want book, chapter, and verse for that, along with a list of authorized punishments.


Offline chosenone

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Re: Women listen up silent treatment is abuse!!
« Reply #15 on: Fri Aug 11, 2017 - 11:30:19 »
You are missing the entire point.  It is WRONG for a wife to punish a husband in any way.  I have said NOTHING advocating a husband punishing a wife.  I state that a wife punishing a husband is the same as a child punishing their parent.
 

Abuse is wrong whoever does it, but a wife's relationship to her husband is not the same as a child's relationship their parent.

Offline chosenone

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Re: Women listen up silent treatment is abuse!!
« Reply #16 on: Fri Aug 11, 2017 - 11:32:39 »
A husband is also commanded to 'love his wife'.  Having the right of punishment does not imply USING that right just because you can.

I Co 13:4  Charity suffereth long, and is kind; charity envieth not; charity vaunteth not itself, is not puffed up,
5  Doth not behave itself unseemly, seeketh not her own, is not easily provoked, thinketh no evil;
6  Rejoiceth not in iniquity, but rejoiceth in the truth;
7  Beareth all things, believeth all things, hopeth all things, endureth all things.

That is the role of a husband towards his wife.

Please show me where the command to love his wife includes him abusing her.

Offline chosenone

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Re: Women listen up silent treatment is abuse!!
« Reply #17 on: Fri Aug 11, 2017 - 18:53:23 »
Still waiting to be shown where the bible says its ok for a husband to punish(abuse) his wife.

Offline 3 Resurrections

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Re: Women listen up silent treatment is abuse!!
« Reply #18 on: Fri Aug 11, 2017 - 21:08:46 »
chosenone  -  This is not to speak for Yahu's position, but unfortunately I do have the experience of sitting in a spiritually abusive independent church for 16 years where the "pastor" and his wife both advocated the option of corporal punishment for a wife if she were not sufficiently cooperative with the husband's leading or commands.  He phrased it subtly from the pulpit, so as to avoid any legal entanglements, but in the men's meetings, these views were a bit more freely expressed.  The pastor's wife even went so far as to send a letter to our local newspaper in support of this opinion.  What prompted her letter to the editor was a response to the "marriage rape" question that was being debated in the news at that time.  It has been many years since I read that editorial, but to loosely quote her, she wrote to the effect that if she herself were so unwise as to flout her husband's commands, that he would be justified in securing her obedience by using the same means that he would use to gain his children's obedience.

You asked where in the Bible there are any such instructions for punishing a wife.  The one text this "pastor" used as "proof" for this method of "leadership" was a twisted interpretation of a fragment of Psalms 141:5.  "Let the righteous smite me; it shall be a kindness..."  Good luck figuring that one out, people.  He also had a very strange interpretation of I Timothy 5:20 for a sort of family-attended corporal punishment for his own children - "Them that sin rebuke before all, that others also may fear" - conveniently ignoring that this was originally Paul's instructions to Timothy on how to deal with ELDERS that blatantly sinned during their ministry.  It's just as they say; in the wrong hands, scripture has been manipulated to say many things that never entered God's mind.

Offline chosenone

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Re: Women listen up silent treatment is abuse!!
« Reply #19 on: Sat Aug 12, 2017 - 03:35:24 »
chosenone  -  This is not to speak for Yahu's position, but unfortunately I do have the experience of sitting in a spiritually abusive independent church for 16 years where the "pastor" and his wife both advocated the option of corporal punishment for a wife if she were not sufficiently cooperative with the husband's leading or commands.  He phrased it subtly from the pulpit, so as to avoid any legal entanglements, but in the men's meetings, these views were a bit more freely expressed.  The pastor's wife even went so far as to send a letter to our local newspaper in support of this opinion.  What prompted her letter to the editor was a response to the "marriage rape" question that was being debated in the news at that time.  It has been many years since I read that editorial, but to loosely quote her, she wrote to the effect that if she herself were so unwise as to flout her husband's commands, that he would be justified in securing her obedience by using the same means that he would use to gain his children's obedience.

You asked where in the Bible there are any such instructions for punishing a wife.  The one text this "pastor" used as "proof" for this method of "leadership" was a twisted interpretation of a fragment of Psalms 141:5.  "Let the righteous smite me; it shall be a kindness..."  Good luck figuring that one out, people.  He also had a very strange interpretation of I Timothy 5:20 for a sort of family-attended corporal punishment for his own children - "Them that sin rebuke before all, that others also may fear" - conveniently ignoring that this was originally Paul's instructions to Timothy on how to deal with ELDERS that blatantly sinned during their ministry.  It's just as they say; in the wrong hands, scripture has been manipulated to say many things that never entered God's mind.

Thank you for your response, as you say any scripture can be taken completely out of context to justify terrible behaviour. How sad that even that wife thought it ok to be abused by her cruel husband. I guess she was under his complete control and manipulation.  ::frown:: How sad that a pastor would advocate assault and rape. I am glad you got out, I would have left the first time I heard that.
 
I still hope that yahu will reply, but I am not holding my breath.  ::shrug::
« Last Edit: Sat Aug 12, 2017 - 03:37:44 by chosenone »

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Re: Women listen up silent treatment is abuse!!
« Reply #20 on: Sat Aug 12, 2017 - 07:26:14 »
  I have said NOTHING advocating a husband punishing a wife. 

Oh, but you did.

You said,

Punishment ALWAYS flows from someone in authority to an individual under their authority.  A wife is NEVER an authority over her husband but commanded to submit to him.

A clear indication that with his authority over her he has the right to punish her.

Then you said,

Having the right of punishment does not imply USING that right just because you can.

You are allowing that a husband does have that right

Continuine you said,

I have said NOTHING advocating a husband punishing a wife

But it is clear by your previous replies that if you knew of a husband who was punishing a wife you would be okay with that.

Offline chosenone

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Re: Women listen up silent treatment is abuse!!
« Reply #21 on: Sun Aug 13, 2017 - 07:35:48 »
I suspect that yahu will not answer rella.

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Re: Women listen up silent treatment is abuse!!
« Reply #22 on: Sun Aug 13, 2017 - 11:22:20 »
I suspect that yahu will not answer rella.

Yes, you are correct Chosenone.

That was my second reply post to Yahu and truly do not expect a reply.

Hopefully I will have given others thinks to consider though as Yahu will not be able to definitively answer me.  ::nodding::

Offline Ray in Florida

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Re: Women listen up silent treatment is abuse!!
« Reply #23 on: Mon Dec 18, 2017 - 20:24:19 »
Haven't posted here in quite some time ... but felt moved to respond ... some of you long-timers might remember me, and all the trials I went through in my own marriage ... wanted to share the following:

Ephesians 5:21 "MUTUAL SUBMISSION ... out of fear/reverence for The Lord" ... the roles of men/husbands and women/wives is more thoroughly delved into beginning in V. 22 ...but another highlight that I found very helpful in my situation years ago ... "Husbands, love your wives as Christ loved the Church, and gave His life for her" ... unconditionally ... sacrificially ...

Offline Jason_NC

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Re: Women listen up silent treatment is abuse!!
« Reply #24 on: Tue Dec 19, 2017 - 18:59:54 »
No, I'm not missing the point.  ::smile::

I get that you say it's "WRONG" for a wife to punish a husband, but you posted that a husband has a "right" to punish the wife. I want book, chapter, and verse for that, along with a list of authorized punishments.

I read his post three times, and nowhere did he say a husband could punish his wife.  You are inferring something he did not say.

Offline Texas Conservative

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Re: Women listen up silent treatment is abuse!!
« Reply #25 on: Tue Dec 19, 2017 - 19:06:22 »
Since we are posting on an old thread, I am still waiting on that sandwich Mommydi.

Offline mommydi

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Re: Women listen up silent treatment is abuse!!
« Reply #26 on: Wed Dec 20, 2017 - 17:26:25 »
Since we are posting on an old thread, I am still waiting on that sandwich Mommydi.


Offline chosenone

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Re: Women listen up silent treatment is abuse!!
« Reply #27 on: Wed Dec 20, 2017 - 19:35:33 »
I read his post three times, and nowhere did he say a husband could punish his wife.  You are inferring something he did not say.


 IT was implied more than once that anyone in authority has the right to punish those under them.
Such as
t comes from a misunderstanding of authority.  Punishment ALWAYS flows from someone in authority to an individual under their authority.  A wife is NEVER an authority over her husband but commanded to submit to him.  Just as a child is not allowed to punish a parent when they don't get their way, a wife is NEVER allowed to punish a husband.  You can ONLY refuse an authority over you IF they command the breaking of a higher law.  The scriptural example is the order to bow to the golden image of king.  It violated Yah's law.

Offline meyerjd77

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Re: Women listen up silent treatment is abuse!!
« Reply #28 on: Thu Mar 01, 2018 - 22:44:59 »
My wife has used the silent treatment throughout our 18 year marriage and while we were dating.  Its been pretty much constant for the last 11 years or so.  She broke the silence last fall to let me know about her 2nd affair and that she was pregnant.  She also informed me a good friend of mine who is a pastor was the father and that he would split the cost of the abortion with her. 

Offline chosenone

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Re: Women listen up silent treatment is abuse!!
« Reply #29 on: Thu Mar 01, 2018 - 23:32:36 »
My wife has used the silent treatment throughout our 18 year marriage and while we were dating.  Its been pretty much constant for the last 11 years or so.  She broke the silence last fall to let me know about her 2nd affair and that she was pregnant.  She also informed me a good friend of mine who is a pastor was the father and that he would split the cost of the abortion with her.

1) why did you marry her if you knew what she was like
2) why are you still married to her knowing what you do.

She has had at least 2 affairs and aborted a baby from a married pastor. She clearly isn't following God at all.

BTW have you reported the pastor to his church and wife? You must do that. He is not fit to be leading a church and if he is married his poor wife needs to know.

I have lived with someone in the past who used the angry silent treatment, and another who used the in your face angry treatment(both men BTW), not sure which was worse.
« Last Edit: Fri Mar 02, 2018 - 04:25:19 by chosenone »

AVZ

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Re: Women listen up silent treatment is abuse!!
« Reply #30 on: Fri Mar 02, 2018 - 00:26:00 »
I always consider the silent treatment a blessing. Finally!

Offline meyerjd77

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Re: Women listen up silent treatment is abuse!!
« Reply #31 on: Fri Mar 02, 2018 - 08:49:41 »
My friend did leave the church and now works at a local meat packing plant.  His wife left him shortly after this all came out.  They are in the process of a divorce.  She moved out of the area, taking their children with her.  As for me I do not believe in divorce.  My wife suffers from rheumatoid arthritis and depends on me to take care of her, our children, and our home as she is very limited in her ability to help out with those things.

Offline Texas Conservative

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Re: Women listen up silent treatment is abuse!!
« Reply #32 on: Fri Mar 02, 2018 - 09:33:31 »
My wife has used the silent treatment throughout our 18 year marriage and while we were dating.  Its been pretty much constant for the last 11 years or so.  She broke the silence last fall to let me know about her 2nd affair and that she was pregnant.  She also informed me a good friend of mine who is a pastor was the father and that he would split the cost of the abortion with her.

You know even God believes in divorce.  As much as He hates it, He gave Israel a writ of divorce for her adultery.

Why would you stay with such a woman?

Offline meyerjd77

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Re: Women listen up silent treatment is abuse!!
« Reply #33 on: Fri Mar 02, 2018 - 16:26:51 »
I have stayed since I don't know who would take care of her.  She's had rheumatiod arthritis for almost two years.  Her mother has passed away and her father is remarried an not concerned with her.  She has very little family and not many friends.  About nine years ago I was ready to move forward divorcing her and was talked out of it by my father.  He passed away before I found out about her 1st affair.  I wonder what he would have said about that.  He always stressed loyalty to me and that was the reason behind him talking me out of divorcing her.

Offline MeMyself

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Re: Women listen up silent treatment is abuse!!
« Reply #34 on: Fri Mar 02, 2018 - 19:59:01 »
I have stayed since I don't know who would take care of her.  She's had rheumatiod arthritis for almost two years.  Her mother has passed away and her father is remarried an not concerned with her.  She has very little family and not many friends.  About nine years ago I was ready to move forward divorcing her and was talked out of it by my father.  He passed away before I found out about her 1st affair.  I wonder what he would have said about that.  He always stressed loyalty to me and that was the reason behind him talking me out of divorcing her.

It sounds like your desire to help is hurting you.

It sounds like codependency.

She needs to be responsible for herself and the consequences of her own actions...

I'm sorry you've been treated this way.