"But one and the same Spirit works all these things, distributing to each one individually as He wills." (1 Corinthians 12:11) So, I can see that the Holy Spirit chooses who gets which gifts.
And our Apostle Paul says he wishes that all men were single like him . . . but > "For I wish that all men were even as I myself. But each one has his own gift from God, one in this manner and another in that." (1 Corinthians 7:7) So, I can see that marriage in Jesus is a gift of the Holy Spirit, and celibacy is a gift.
So - - through 1 Corinthians 12:11, I see that the Holy Spirit chooses who gets which gift. So, it is not about what I want. A gift can be used to bring me to where I don't want to go, but I'll be glad God did.
In my case, I have been interested in marrying quite a number of different women, but it seems there is something deeper that is winning
I would say that the real gift of the Holy Spirit will have you getting more like Jesus, and not be bringing out your own nature and your personality flaws which can act up when you are seeking what you just want for yourself. So, if you get more into something, and start meeting with ever more frustration and arguing and confusion and not getting better in how God has us loving . . . this can show how God does not bless us to do what He doesn't want.