YOU are immature, angry, bitter, resentful and totally selfish.
That's nice. At least I give a dang about myself. People who go cutting themselves and killing themselves are idiots. Me, I am the opposite of suicide. In self harm there is no gain, only loss. I want myself to gain. It's better to hurt someone else than hurt yourself. That's the cruelity that has been born in this suffering. Before I once used to let my hurting feelings walk all over me, and be mr.depresso. It only hurt me. So instead of drowning myself in my own tears, I thought it would be better to fight my pain, with how much I despise it. Thats the source of all my rage right there. I wouldn't be so angry if I wasn't so hurt any lonely, but I guess God doesn't care enough to give me what I need to be comforted out of that pain.
So you think that if God doesn't find you a girlfriend NOW you have the excuse to sleep around?
No, I think since God hasn't given me a girlfriend after all this painful terrible ridiculous waiting, I should not have to wait anymore. If He has a problem with it, He should be giving me what I need to be appropriate, which is what I friggen wanted in the first place. It's not my fault He's so damn slow. I have feelings too ya know?
Do you think He is scared at your threats?
Not at all. My actions are not to instill fear upon the fearless Lord. No, my actions are to make Him pay, by hurting His feelings, bringing shame to His name, leading other people away from Him. I know if I had a son and He rebelled against me and turned my other kids against me, I would be hurt inside more than almost any other thing, and for Gods failure I am going to put Him through that hurt until He gives me my babe.
You also sound extremely spoilt, demanding and manipulative, more like a 5 year old than a 21 year old..
I am intelligent, and full of passion. I have chosen to play the cards that God has dealt me in life, no matter how terrible they are. Though there are many worse hands, this one is paticularly dire.
Do you really think that a good father gives his children EVERYTHING that they ask for?
I'm not asking for everything. I'm only asking for one thing, and the longer I wait without it, the more I hurt, and I don't wanna hurt anymore. The hurt is too much for me. I have asked nicely, many times, or pleaded and begged in desperation, many times. It didn't work. If something doesn't work, the logical thing to do is try something else. So after trying everything else I've decided I am done asking nicely.
We have all asked for things that we didnt get. So what.
This one thing matters to me more than any other. It wouldn't matter to me like this if I were begging God for some nice car or nice house, or to be rich or famous. I really don't care about those things, I trust God to take care of my basic needs (Food, shelter, finances, etc)
You don't go to church,
Actually, I do... So you don't know what you're talking about.
you care nothing about anyone but yourself,
Not entirely true. The people who are close to me are very important. Everyone else, strangers, they mean anything to me.
No girl will be interested in you the way you are.Believe me, they will run a mile.
Rather than spitting words of doom and condemnation at me, why don't you point me in the direction of the keys out of this prison of being single? You 'are' a true loving Christian, are you not?
you hate God and blame him wrongly for your unhappiness.
I actually don't hate God. I'm just fiercely ticked off at Him right now. I still pray, praise Him, read His Word, and have a relationship with Him. The only problem is this fierce loneliness that is causing me to be angry with Him. Other than that I do really want things to work out. Otherwise I wouldn't be here right now, talking to you guys, hoping I get some kind of real solution out of all of this.
You need to let go of this bitterness and anger and selfishness and allow God to work in you. .
It wouldn't be there if He started to care about me again.
do you really think you are the only one who has been through stuff?
No. We all have our own battles and wounds. But I don't have the strength to help others in their battles or wounds until I am clear of this one. A warrior without food or rest, isn't able to fight well in a war.
God is NOT responsible for these things,
No, He just sat there and let them happen, kinda like a dad watching two criminals beat on his daughter right infront of him, and he just sits there as she cries out to him, and he does nothing, until they beat her, rape her, bleed her, and leave her lying in the sandbox. That whole time she cried out and He could of stopped it, with the gun in his hand, but instead He chose to neglect her and not own up to the responsibility of caring for his daughter.
He is there to help.
If He is then He will prove it to me. But I don't see Him telling me where and how to meet her, let alone how to prepare myself to make the relationship even more awesome.
Do you think you are the only one who has been rejected by a girlfriend/boyfriend? Goodness there are many of us here whose marriages have been destroyed after many many years, That is rejection.
I really don't care. I didn't come here to get involved in others peoples problems, I came here to find a solution for mine. Maybe later when I have someone, I'll be feeling better and feel like coming back and help those people. But with how I feel now, I just want to make someone hurt until I find my girl. (No that is not a threat, I only hurt people verbally)
I really hope that you don't treat those you meet like you have treated people here. If you do then no wonder you are lonely. People DO NOT want to be around bitter angry and resentful people. You will drive people away.
Like I said before, the friends and people that I truely know, mean a lot to me. Total strangers, I usually couldn't give a less. There are exceptions because I am always up for meeting new people. Other than that, if I don't know you, then you have no value to me. In fact if I had to slaughter a hundred people to get my girl, (And not get hurt or locked up for it) then I would do it with delight, and with no guilt. That's what happens when pain hardens your heart.
Have you ever heard a child asking their Mom or Dad for something that they were not ready for yet? Sure--the kid thinks it's time---he's ready for it---confident it is best for him. But his parents KNOW BETTER. So they say "no". They love the child and want what is BEST FOR HIM. His impatience is real--he feels he's being cheated, and complains loudly that his parents are unfair, etc. And his complaints are real and heart-felt. To him his parents are being harsh and unloving. But it is not the case. They truly love him and want only what will result in the absolute best for him.
This is different. Hypatheticly this is more like a dad holding his sons toy right infront of his face, teasing him with it, acting like he's gonna give it to him, but not giving it to him. Tired of putting my face up against the friggen glass.
But we need to remember that God has His own timing---
Gods timing sucks. If it were anything perfect He would have given this to me long ago and I would also be ready for it. Instead He fails to meet that perfection. So His timing is not perfect like the Word says. It's written in Psalms 37-3 "Delight yourself in the Lord and He will give you the desires of your heart."
My desire is for this girl, for all if it to be awesome, and I have waited a long time already so I'd like it by like the end of this year. Sick of seeing everyone else having their relationships, while I'm still waiting to have my very first.
He is the GOOD SHEPHERD.
That's why he's given me over to the wolves, right? What a loving good Shepard. Takes his sheep who loves Him, and watches him getting eaten by wolves right infront of him, as His sheep cries out to Him, and He just sits there starring.
Chirst needs to get crucified again.
We think we have it ALL FIGURED OUT-----we KNOW what's best for us---LOL---we want to depend on our own understanding----
Well let me ask you something. When you get hungry do you wanna eat? You could have a lifetime supply of water available to you, but it will do no good for your hunger, only your thirst. And you will die of starvation if that is all you are given.
God loves you Mike!!
I really wish I could believe that. I just don't see it anymore.
Mike, I love ya...been in relationship for 24 years ---been single finally for four ---
I'm in heavan and have never felt loneliness.
Wouldn't trade singlehood for anything.
Maybe God actually lets you feel Him all the time.
The rest of us? Not so lucky...
He traded His only conceived Son for you. He allowed His son to be tortured and tormented and spat upon and torn to bits and cruelly hung up to die in what was considered the nastiest most shameful most degrading way to be executed in that time and place. He allowed Jesus to hang instead of you.
You say God doesn't care? I've heard a lot of off-the-wall statements over the years, but very few have sounded any more like blasphemy than that.
If someone takes a bullet for you to save your life, but for the rest of your lives they ignore you and turn their back on you, that person has stopped caring about you. That's figuretively what He's done to me.
Just because one is alone doesn't mean one has to be lonely.
He already gave you someone to love and center your life around. He gave you Himself. He specifically gave you His Son
That means little if I can't touch or cuddle with Him.
He bought you back, for Himself, by sending His son to pay to get you off that auction block. His Holy Spirit, the very essence of His presence, is willing to be with you forever.
Well I'm not in Heaven yet. When I get there, yes, I'll be entirely happy and lacking nothing. But here, I am lonely and hurt, in need of comfort while I wait for Heaven. I'm asking for just a little slice of Heaven on earth, a wife.
You have many years left in which to find a spouse with God's help, or not.
What the hell makes you think I wanna wait more? I will not be young forever. Now is the time. Now is my prime. The younger I am the more time we'll get to have to enjoy eachothers youthful attraction and strength. The longer it takes, the less we'll get to have.
Exactly how are you going about trying to find someone, anyway?
To be honest it is rather difficult. I go places, church, the mall, Cruisin Grand (Car show), the park, partys, kickbacks, or hanging out with friends. Most the girls I ever meet, are either too young, or already taken, or BOTH. The ones who aren't, that I find an interest in, usually act like they like me at first, but then either I move to fast and scare them away, or they pretend to like me but lead me on til they suddenly drop me cold, or show up with their new boyfriend who usually ends up treating them like crap or cheating on them. I have been hurt by a lot of girls, and I'm tired of it. It's like wandering thru a desert and I think I finally see water, then I dive in and get a mouth full of sand, finding out that it was only a mirrage. I have tried dating sites, both christian and secular, and with no result. It seems the only way this will work is if God arranges a meeting somehow and puts this person into my life. I wish He would stop stalling.
When you don't "need" someone anymore, then you will be ready to have someone.
That's like telling someone to stop getting hungry. No matter how much to deny the existance of your hunger for food, you will eventually starve. Hence, my soul and emotions have been starving, which has caused damage to my spiritual walk.
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