I was just strolling through christian forums when I happened on your post. When I started reading the replies I felt I also wanted to reach out and just validate you in what you are going through. Christ is all about the little details in our lives as well as the big ones, and he cares about everything we struggle with. I have struggled with depression, anxiety, etc throughout my life, even felt some of the things you've described due to insecurity at times. Now single again, the last thing I want to do is date. However what you struggle with is not an isolated struggle by far. And to be fair, it takes courage to admit the authentic parts of our lives, emotions, struggles, etc. Give yourself credit for doing so because you deserve it.
None of us are perfect and we all have our issues. If dating were left to perfect people or people who have it all together already surely it'd be a misrable existence for all. And while the best attractor is confidence, the reality is we attract people that mirrors our own personal level of confidence. People who suffer anxiety often struggle with reacting from fears rather than giving the truth a chance. And I get it. It helps to remember everyday that we have perfect love in Christ. We start with that perfect love everyday as the foundation, as the reality, as the inspiration that never fades. Why would Christ give you second best? Ultimately these times of singleness is reserved for the personal teaching of His perfect love for you. It means this is a special time in your life that God will not leave it to the imperfect love of others for you to know how much you are valued, how deeply intimate he is, how trustworthy he is, and faithful.
Can you imagine why God who created this vast universe, who brings kings to their knees, who rises the sun every morning would do everything he could do to be with us? I mean, we need community absolutely. And God created us for intimacy. Sometimes God allows personal struggles like anxiety, insecurity, depression, relationship struggles and whatever else to make us realize how much we need perfect love. And from that perfect love as a foundation we forgive and grow even in/with imperfect love, moving closer to his love.
If you are in Christ, yours or my personal issues aren't our personal issues, they are Christ's as well to hold in his grace, teaching, direction. This is what probably drew me to this post to encourage you. He loves you. He understands your struggle more than anyone else. He is gentle and kind. He doesn't want you to fix everything, just give it over to him so he can do wonderful and amazing things in your life when trusting him, his goodness, his direction and love. We indeed have that amazing God with a love that is over anything we can imagine it to be. It's so important to know he cares so much to reach out make us understand he does not criticism, condemn, or belittle our needs. He gave us needs, God sized needs because only he can fill them in the way we need. Don't give up to discouragement or despair my friend. Keep praying, get closer to him, seek him, for he delights in those who trust in his unfailing love. He has a purpose for your life, your relationships, your struggles.