What do women want in a husband?

[wolflet7]

Okay, us guys have played fair by answering Fem's topic as to what we want in a wife.  Now, women, I believe it is YOUR time to open up   

What do you want in a husband physically, mentally, spiritually, etc.

[chosenone]

well I am actually married (second marriage) to a good man and here are some the things I wanted in a husband.(and got)
godly, honest, patient, good sense of humour, high moral standards, someone who I can respect, kind, laid back and caring.

[yesult]

wow, I second the above.

Physically. I don't care. (I'm reallllllly hoping that God will give me someone that I swoon over though.) The thing is when you love someone you think they're gorgeous anyway so it doesn't really matter. (In fact that can start happening when you like someone, let alone love them.)

Mentally. Someone roughly on the same level.

Spiritually. As above.

etc. anything else a bonus.


Like most people, ultimatly I think I just want to be happy  with a best friend to do life with and love. If you're at the same level spiritually then I think everything else is ultimatly going to be sweet because you can work through it.

[Elaine]

well I am actually married (second marriage) to a good man and here are some the things I wanted in a husband.(and got)
godly, honest, patient, good sense of humour, high moral standards, someone who I can respect, kind, laid back and caring.

All of the above and a non-smoker, non-alcoholic, employed and mostly have dealt with his childhood crap or baggage so he doesn't act it all out on ME...thus, meaning integrated, mature and whole, acting like an adult.
(Doesn't pout, whine, isn't overly ridiculously sensitive, doesn't take everything personally ---that's being a mature adult.)
Has to love animals and be compassionate and care about others more than himself. (So not lazy.)

And not an atheist like the guy I see.

Has to be clean and always smell yummy.
 Expresses his thoughts and feelings  -not harboring things till they build up.

Loves me more than his family and friends - and gives me "enough" attention without smothering me or being needy.

Great smile and beams it at me alot.

I could think of more with more time.

[zoonance]

They want a 49 year old fabulously handsome white guy who works in a zoo. 

[Elaine]

They want a 49 year old fabulously handsome white guy who works in a zoo. 

Unless he's way over sexed...which is always the case with those handsome guys taking care of animals all day.
How's the finger?

[zoonance]

My thumb is doing fine.  thanks for asking!  It still feels a bit numb on the end but otherwise I can still hitch a ride.

[wolflet7]

Wow, great responses girls!  That really gives me more confidence; the fact that women focus more on spiritual stuff and feelings more than looks or whatever.  That makes me feel great because my mom constantly tells me that I am all of those plus things. 

Yesult, I believe that God will provide us with a wonderful person and that He will fit your physical wants/needs in a person.  He will not send somebody your way if they are, in your opinion, not very charming/handsome.  Besides that, people can change their looks.  I used to be the ugliest kid in Jr. High, but now I'm hot in high school 

[yesult]

Wow, great responses girls!  That really gives me more confidence; the fact that women focus more on spiritual stuff and feelings more than looks or whatever.  That makes me feel great because my mom constantly tells me that I am all of those plus things. 

Yesult, I believe that God will provide us with a wonderful person and that He will fit your physical wants/needs in a person.  He will not send somebody your way if they are, in your opinion, not very charming/handsome.  Besides that, people can change their looks.  I used to be the ugliest kid in Jr. High, but now I'm hot in high school 

Thanks    Yeah I think so too. Overall it is nice to be attracted to your future partner but at the end of the day, if they're really spunky but quite self-absorbed or domineering I think the gloss would wear off pretty quickly. God is good and more then capable of exceeding our ideas though. Looks are icing on the cake but the cake has to be the main feature. Glad to hear you're making a mark in your school

[janine]

What an inexperienced young girl wants in a husband may not have anything to do with the same list of qualities she might write after she's got some years on her.

[Bocephus]

Sometimes it sounds like women want a man who acts like a woman.

[janine]

Perhaps for ease of communication.  The best thing, though, would be to find a man who still walks and talks and quacks like a man, but who can make himself understood and can understand a woman's POV.

Skilled communication is definitely not a "female" thing, but more women may come pre-wired with much of the skill set needed.

[Richard]

Perhaps for ease of communication.  The best thing, though, would be to find a man who still walks and talks and quacks like a man, but who can make himself understood and can understand a woman's POV.

Skilled communication is definitely not a "female" thing, but more women may come pre-wired with much of the skill set needed.

Hah! There is more to communication than just talking.

Ok...I'm running for cover now....

[Elaine]

Perhaps for ease of communication.  The best thing, though, would be to find a man who still walks and talks and quacks like a man, but who can make himself understood and can understand a woman's POV.

Skilled communication is definitely not a "female" thing, but more women may come pre-wired with much of the skill set needed.

Hah! There is more to communication than just talking.

Ok...I'm running for cover now....

I forgot commnication --that is key!   That is precisely why I'm single now ----all the breakups had to do with them not communicating.  This is key in friendships, also, of course. (I am a communicator, big time!! Begging them sometimes to TALK to me!!)

One key is, at a minimum, to be able  to communicate enough of what you're feeling or thinking when your thoughts are turning "bad" ---thinking she doesn't love me enough, doesn't pay enough attention to me...instead of keeping it to yourself and then having resentments and a scoresheet starting -----so when you finally DO say something ----your mind and heart are already shut down. Or you come off so angry there is no dialogue. Just a wall and finger pointing.

Richard, no reason to hide, pray-tell, ---whatcha mean?  Buying gifts?
 Washing the dishes? Taking her to dinner?  Giving a hug? Telling her she looks great this morning?

All that can break the ice, but doesn't compare to real communication of thoughts and feelings, ie., about plans unfulfilled, expectations not happening, hurts that have been building and will continue if not brought to the light.

So besides talking what did you mean, Richard?  Anything to help us all get along better, don't keep a secret?    Or were you just joking around? Which is ok.

Thanks,
:)Elaine

 

 

[Bocephus]

You all are definitely asking for a woman with a man part now.