What do women want in a husband?

[Elaine]

Gary,
What's a man "like" then. In your opinion?
:)Elaine

[Cally]

You all are definitely asking for a woman with a man part now.

  That was excellent, Gary.   That'll have me laughing for a long time . . .

I see women disappointed or excited by a man when it looks like the man can take her along with what he's doing, into something exciting. For instance, she likes his career, likes his faith, his goals, and so on, and wants to be part of it. And I see disappointment when she doesn't approve of what that is, and sometimes she ends up trying to change what it is the man is going after (you don't REALLY like the career you're going after, do you? You want to do more than that?). Things of that nature tend to be what causes a woman to be happy to be around or bored and want to take off.

But yeah, these days the poor guy has to be pretty much everything . . . (these days so does she, I guess, but my sources/statistics say that men aren't quite as finicky).

[yesult]

You all are definitely asking for a woman with a man part now.

No, all that's been asked for is a man who doesn't expect women to mold themselves to his gender viewpoint because he's the 'most important', but to meet his wife partway. That takes effort.

[Wycliffes_Shillelagh]

Wolflet...do exactly the OPPOSITE of everything the women in this thread say...and you'll have to beat the women off with a stick.

 

Better increase my count of days earned in purgatory after that...

[janine]

Have to beat them off with a stick?

Hah.

Only because they'll be approaching with sticks to beat him.

[JohnDB]

YEah...beat them off with a stick...a really big one.

You see...many of us guys age poorly. They get beer bellies and tied up with their careers or are such sick pups that nobody wants to be near them.

So...when you hit the forty something mark...you ain't gotta chase a woman one...they come chasing after you...and with a vengance. So...actually if you are a normal guy with out any major hang ups like alcoholism or huge piercings and tattoos all over your body..can actually hold your end of a conversation...

You will be surrounded by pretty and financially successful women...all vieing for your attention. Cause there ain't many of us guys out there that are dedicated Christian, mature, and healthy (physically and emotionally) out in the world. We are the minority. And if any of them decide that we didn't put the spoon on their breakfast tray when we brought them breakfast in bead so we are evil monsters who are only self centered egotists...you can say, "SEE YA" and not think a thing of it. There will be another one right behind her ready to take her place on the sheets soon enough.

Just a fact of life.

BUT...if I were you. Avoid the Charismatic churchs. The women in them wear dresses and skirts for a reason. (they fly up as they jump into your lap)...and that sort of thing isn't good for anybody.

[chosenone]

YEah...beat them off with a stick...a really big one.

You see...many of us guys age poorly. They get beer bellies and tied up with their careers or are such sick pups that nobody wants to be near them.

So...when you hit the forty something mark...you ain't gotta chase a woman one...they come chasing after you...and with a vengance. So...actually if you are a normal guy with out any major hang ups like alcoholism or huge piercings and tattoos all over your body..can actually hold your end of a conversation...

You will be surrounded by pretty and financially successful women...all vieing for your attention. Cause there ain't many of us guys out there that are dedicated Christian, mature, and healthy (physically and emotionally) out in the world. We are the minority. And if any of them decide that we didn't put the spoon on their breakfast tray when we brought them breakfast in bead so we are evil monsters who are only self centered egotists...you can say, "SEE YA" and not think a thing of it. There will be another one right behind her ready to take her place on the sheets soon enough.

Just a fact of life.

BUT...if I were you. Avoid the Charismatic churchs. The women in them wear dresses and skirts for a reason. (they fly up as they jump into your lap)...and that sort of thing isn't good for anybody.

 

yes john I know what you mean. When I was divorced in my mid 40's, It wasn't even a question of not having MANY men to chose from, it was a question of NO men to chose from. not a one in sight anywhere. not a single available Christian guy in my church (which was a reasonable sized church.) nor anywere else I knew of (of around my age).
HOWEVER God said to me one day in church "don't settle for second best" and about two years later after being on a Christian dating site for 2 years he bought along my knight in shining armour, who is THE BEST. SO it can be done with Gods amazing help.I do have my pride though and would never have settled for anyone who wasn't right for me, or godly, or honest or kind etc etc etc.I wanted to marry again but I wasn't THAT desperate.


I always think that is why Christian men marry a lot sooner than women after a divorce or their wife has died, cos they have 3 or 4 women for each of them. This gets more so as we age.  We have about a dozen or so middle aged divorced women in our church who are single and no men in this position as far as I know.

 What is this about women in Charismatic churches and skirts and dresses? I go to a Charismatic church and I nearly always wear trousers.

[JohnDB]

When I visited several charismatic churchs (cause they had a singles group) I found myself very quickly becoming "the hat that was being passed"

I didn't like the position so I would leave. It became a common thing in each and every charismatic church with a singles group. Even some of the other denominations had a similar thing but it wasn't near as prevalant as in the Charismatic churchs that I visited. When you are our age...it doesn't take very long to figure out what others are about...and that sort of thing isn't what I am about.

Don't get me wrong...I like sex. I just don't like sex with strangers. For some reason women think all of us guys will love them if we have sex with them or we will owe them a relationship if we have sex with them. That flat out isn't true...and many of them know it but still continue on with the behavior. Sure they will feel guilty about it next sunday...but...dang.

Yeah sure looks are somewhat important. Being wider than you are tall is always a negative thing on everyone's mind.  But ain't many of us all that trim so some slack can be cut. (OK...So I am trim and somewhat muscular...I work construction) But that never stopped me from dating a woman that was a little overweight.

Kids are always a something to look at too. I knew one woman...rather nice and kind (wanted a romance with me something fierce) but she had a nightmare for children (one grown and one still in gradeschool) One was a jailbird and the other a holy terror.  She also had all kinds of debt out there...huge insurmountable sums to ever pay off. There was no way I was ever going to get myself involved with her. Too many other nice and attractive ladies to spend my time with in that sort of fashion. She was fun...but no majic whatsoever. She got really mad at me when I got married too...(I did well to stay far away from her)
Some women want a guy to rescue them...I wanted one willing to start working even harder than she currently was.  

[Elaine]

I always think that is why Christian men marry a lot sooner than women after a divorce or their wife has died, ....

Chosenone,

Now that could be another topic!!   LOL

I have my own opinions why men marry sooner than women....and I'm not talking about sex, either.

:)Elaine

[Isabell Island]

Women now want very different things in a relationship than our mothers or grandmothers wanted.  Back then, there was a financial component and necessity for women to get married.  Now women can have much higher standards; not because we are finicky but because we have more options and we don't have to get married if we don't meet the right one. 

I am fortunate to have found a very good man, but I spent many years working on my own goals and not looking for a relationship just for the sake of having one.  My husband happens to be much younger than I am, but more mature and wise than most men my age.  His good looks are just a bonus!   

We respect each other and are not attached at the hip.  After six years together, we still sometimes stay up all night just talking about events or beliefs.  We are each other's best friend, but not at the exclusion of having other friends. He gives me my space when I need it and I do the same for him. We enjoy each others company, maybe because we don't demand it every possible second we are under the same roof, but we do make time for each other and then have things to catch up on.

My best advice for men is to be yourself and wait until you find a woman compatible with that.  If you are selfish, untrustworthy or piggish, that woman may never come along. If she accepts those traits in a man, she may have her own baggage as well.  If you are trying to be as healthy as possible (spiritually, psychologically, physically) and be the best person you can be to your fellow man (and woman); others will recognize that and be drawn to you.

 

[son of God]

For both men and women, do they look for a bit of themselves in others?

[Wycliffes_Shillelagh]

Some women want a guy to rescue them...

I call this "White Knight Syndrome."

[Elaine]

Some women want a guy to rescue them...

I call this "White Knight Syndrome."

Do ya?    I call it "Delusional".

[yesult]

Women now want very different things in a relationship than our mothers or grandmothers wanted.  Back then, there was a financial component and necessity for women to get married.  Now women can have much higher standards; not because we are finicky but because we have more options and we don't have to get married if we don't meet the right one.  

I am fortunate to have found a very good man, but I spent many years working on my own goals and not looking for a relationship just for the sake of having one.  My husband happens to be much younger than I am, but more mature and wise than most men my age.  His good looks are just a bonus!    

We respect each other and are not attached at the hip.  After six years together, we still sometimes stay up all night just talking about events or beliefs.  We are each other's best friend, but not at the exclusion of having other friends. He gives me my space when I need it and I do the same for him. We enjoy each others company, maybe because we don't demand it every possible second we are under the same roof, but we do make time for each other and then have things to catch up on.

Does he have a brother?