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Author Topic: does anyone have a problem w/ swearing?  (Read 2636 times)

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Offline th1b.taylor

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Re: does anyone have a problem w/ swearing?
« Reply #35 on: Tue Mar 27, 2018 - 19:28:45 »
hi, i don't swear a lot, not usually but there are outer influences that can cause me to swear even when i do not want to do so but it just makes me feel better, if i don't i don't feel better and then i think what's the big deal? it's just an outlet but then i don't think God likes it. i don't want a reply telling me that God doesn't like me to so just don't do it if that's the case, but i want understanding and compassion and help. if you don't swear at all then how do you do it. is it b/c you always have an easy life? is it is b/c it's a 'personality' trait i have that i need an outlet? Thank you a lot
Hello from a tired of the pain old veteran in the woods of SE Texas and take heart, if I can do it a sweet lady can do it also.

I was raised in a house where Incest was the rule of the day, before the, so called, Sexual Revolution was even considered.  Since I had viewed my mother doing things that I can not get out of my head before I was 6 and because q filthy mouth was normal, every day, conversation, you betcha I cursed enough to curl a thirty year sailor's toes.  And that was truly, the least of my filthy habits, growing up in a house where until I was ten, the bedroom door of my mom never closed, my sisters and I had an education that until the ┬┐Sexual Revolution? could only be gained in the worst Brothels of the Asian World.  Lots to be bitter about and I was.

I spent two months short of eight years in the Army with thirty months total for three tours in Vietnam and that did nothing to improve my vocabulary and on my Separation I picked up my guitar and played in some real nice Joints such as Little Moes and Porky's where somebody was, at least, going to the hospital, all of which did nothing for my filthy mouth.

Do I curse today?  No mam, Yashua and His Father, YHWH got a hold of me through Ruach. the Holy Spirit and nothing, from that day forward is the same.  I do, when I get upset or something goes horribly, sometimes release the irritation by screaming at the top of my vocal range, "Well, spit on the bucket!"  For irritating but less stressful situations I usually shorten that down to "Spit."

There is nothing wrong with your personality that is not common to all of us, we were all born Sinful Humans, in need of being molded through Ruach by Yashua.

And please do not be nor feel intimidated because I have chosen to refer to our LORD by the untranslated original names, it does not make me think I am Holier than anyone.  I just have a Hallelujah Scriptures Bible and the true Jewish names for all things and people were left in place and I just want to Worship my Elohim (God) in everything I do, even my marriage.

May you be blessed as much as He has blessed me and mine.

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Re: does anyone have a problem w/ swearing?
« Reply #35 on: Tue Mar 27, 2018 - 19:28:45 »

Offline Open Heart

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Re: does anyone have a problem w/ swearing?
« Reply #36 on: Tue Mar 27, 2018 - 20:04:56 »
We are to love our neighbors as ourselves.  Profanity takes all our emotional frustration and generalized anger and just dumps it on everyone else.  That is incredibly unkind, despite the fact that this rudeness has become common.  We have a moral obligation to create a healthy atmosphere among those we come into contact with, to treat them as we want to be treated.


There are certain specific exceptions to the rule.  The first is if you have sudden intense pain and this I believe outweighs other considerations.  The second is that there are occasions where you are addressing specific wrongs that are outrageous.  To not cuss may give the impression that these wrongs are less than heinous.  In such cases, if one has a habit of cussing, no one will pay much attention it. However, if one never cusses and suddenly does, it will have a certain shock effect that will deliver the impact one wants.


There are certain words that should never be used, no matter what the situation is.  Any words referring to God are in this category.  Also, there are words that are demeaning to groups of people, aka are sexist or racist, and therefore contain hate.  This would be words like c*** or n*****.

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Re: does anyone have a problem w/ swearing?
« Reply #36 on: Tue Mar 27, 2018 - 20:04:56 »

Online Ginger Rella

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Re: does anyone have a problem w/ swearing?
« Reply #37 on: Tue Mar 27, 2018 - 20:24:13 »
However, if one never cusses and suddenly does, it will have a certain shock effect that will deliver the impact one wants.




Oh boy, you made me smile at a memory of a good 50 some years ago.

The folks ad I were off visiting my Grandma and as was the habit, we would kill time playing some game like Monopoly, Tripoly, or Canasta.....

We were actually playing Canasta and Grandma was getting just the worst cards you can imagine all afternoon, when all of a sudden she picked up one and out of her mouth came "Well, I'll be damned."

It was another bad card and she was just so outdone at her bad luck.

And this came from one who I had never ever heard utter anything off colored at all ever... So you are so correct if one never cusses
it is a shock effect cause my response was a shocked "Grandma!"

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Re: does anyone have a problem w/ swearing?
« Reply #38 on: Tue Mar 27, 2018 - 20:38:23 »
True story. My older brother spent time in the Navy and then over 20 in the army. Retired, and he was a rather devilish kind of guy for a long time.  After he retired from military, he reduced his cussing by using the "one cuss word" method. But, his word was "Bullmanurehockeyshitpeehell". Worked for him and not many were offended. Don't know how he came up with it, but apparently it worked.

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Re: does anyone have a problem w/ swearing?
« Reply #38 on: Tue Mar 27, 2018 - 20:38:23 »
Pinterest: GraceCentered.com

Offline Open Heart

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Re: does anyone have a problem w/ swearing?
« Reply #39 on: Wed Mar 28, 2018 - 00:26:05 »
We are to love our neighbors as ourselves.  We don't do that when we curse.  Cursing spews all our negative emotions all over everyone else and it's not right and not Christian.  We need to control our tongues out of respect for others.


There are two exceptions to this rule:
1.  If one experiences sudden and severe pain, cursing actually lessens the pain.  That overrides other concerns.
2.  If one is confronting a severe wrong, not swearing may mistakenly make it seem as though the wrong were less horrendous.


Finally, there are some swear words that should never be used no matter what the circumstance.
A. Any word pertaining to God should never be uttered as a profanity.
B. Words which deride groups aka which are sexist or racist are HATEFUL and should NEVER be used, such as c*** or n*****.

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Re: does anyone have a problem w/ swearing?
« Reply #39 on: Wed Mar 28, 2018 - 00:26:05 »



Offline MeMyself

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Re: does anyone have a problem w/ swearing?
« Reply #40 on: Wed Mar 28, 2018 - 09:35:05 »
Cursing spews all our negative emotions all over everyone else and it's not right and not Christian. 

Do you mean to say that all negative emotions should be hidden?

Offline Alan

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Re: does anyone have a problem w/ swearing?
« Reply #41 on: Wed Mar 28, 2018 - 10:53:18 »

There are two exceptions to this rule:
1.  If one experiences sudden and severe pain, cursing actually lessens the pain.  That overrides other concerns.
2.  If one is confronting a severe wrong, not swearing may mistakenly make it seem as though the wrong were less horrendous.



Obviously, these are your own exceptions.

Offline mommydi

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Re: does anyone have a problem w/ swearing?
« Reply #42 on: Wed Mar 28, 2018 - 11:41:06 »
th1b.taylor, I can't even imagine the awfulness of being raised as you've described and experienced. I'm so sorry you and your siblings had to live through that. So very sorry.


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Re: does anyone have a problem w/ swearing?
« Reply #43 on: Wed Mar 28, 2018 - 11:43:22 »
th1b.taylor, like mommydi said...I am so so sorry for your experiences in childhood.  Just awful. 

Offline mommydi

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Re: does anyone have a problem w/ swearing?
« Reply #44 on: Wed Mar 28, 2018 - 11:50:24 »
This is what I'm talking about -

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FJmrp6dJtrM

Offline chosenone

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Re: does anyone have a problem w/ swearing?
« Reply #45 on: Wed Mar 28, 2018 - 13:26:53 »
We are to love our neighbors as ourselves.  We don't do that when we curse.  Cursing spews all our negative emotions all over everyone else and it's not right and not Christian.  We need to control our tongues out of respect for others.


There are two exceptions to this rule:
1.  If one experiences sudden and severe pain, cursing actually lessens the pain.  That overrides other concerns.
2.  If one is confronting a severe wrong, not swearing may mistakenly make it seem as though the wrong were less horrendous.


Finally, there are some swear words that should never be used no matter what the circumstance.
A. Any word pertaining to God should never be uttered as a profanity.
B. Words which deride groups aka which are sexist or racist are HATEFUL and should NEVER be used, such as c*** or n*****.

I cant agree with either of your exceptions. How does swearing lessen the pain? Why do we have to swear to confront a severe wrong? We can easily do that without swearing.

Online Ginger Rella

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Re: does anyone have a problem w/ swearing?
« Reply #46 on: Wed Mar 28, 2018 - 13:43:13 »
th1b.taylor, like mommydi said, and also MeMyself..  I also am so sorry for your  childhood experiences .   

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Re: does anyone have a problem w/ swearing?
« Reply #47 on: Wed Mar 28, 2018 - 13:46:07 »
Why do we have to swear to confront a severe wrong?

Cause most of the time the one wronging us only understands a sharp comeback

Offline angelic

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Re: does anyone have a problem w/ swearing?
« Reply #48 on: Wed Mar 28, 2018 - 14:09:20 »
@chosenone 'I just don't think it's as effective when i don't swear in those unusual times and then i don't feel better. What alternatives do you use? Thanks'

i was waiting for your reply. i would really be grateful for all the help i can get and learn from. Thank you  ::smile::
« Last Edit: Wed Mar 28, 2018 - 15:21:51 by angelic »

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Re: does anyone have a problem w/ swearing?
« Reply #49 on: Wed Mar 28, 2018 - 18:16:58 »
Using very well chosen words and speaking with an even tone is extremely effective when replying to someone that has wronged us. I think the reason many people turn to profanity in these instances is because they have difficulty articulating and swearing just seems to fill in those gaps.

Offline chosenone

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Re: does anyone have a problem w/ swearing?
« Reply #50 on: Wed Mar 28, 2018 - 19:42:47 »
@chosenone 'I just don't think it's as effective when i don't swear in those unusual times and then i don't feel better. What alternatives do you use? Thanks'

i was waiting for your reply. i would really be grateful for all the help i can get and learn from. Thank you  ::smile::
'
Find an alternative word to use that isn't a swear word. I have never felt better when swearing so its hard for me to say. I did find that the longer I was following God the less I wanted to say things like that, and if you are a newish believer then I think that will happen for you. Ask God to help you with this.

Offline Carey

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Re: does anyone have a problem w/ swearing?
« Reply #51 on: Thu Mar 29, 2018 - 08:19:51 »
I cant agree with either of your exceptions. How does swearing lessen the pain? Why do we have to swear to confront a severe wrong? We can easily do that without swearing.

How swearing lessens pain is yet undetermined as far as I know, but studies have shown that it does.  The effect is much more pronounced in individuals that never swear than those where profanity is a normal part of their vocabulary.



Offline mommydi

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Re: does anyone have a problem w/ swearing?
« Reply #52 on: Thu Mar 29, 2018 - 08:30:06 »
How swearing lessens pain is yet undetermined as far as I know, but studies have shown that it does.  The effect is much more pronounced in individuals that never swear than those where profanity is a normal part of their vocabulary.


I just read this article about that very thing, Carey!

http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/health/8147170.stm

So if someone wants profanity to help reduce pain, they shouldn't be casually using it when not in pain. Fascinating.

Offline Open Heart

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Re: does anyone have a problem w/ swearing?
« Reply #53 on: Fri Mar 30, 2018 - 03:27:44 »
How swearing lessens pain is yet undetermined as far as I know, but studies have shown that it does.  The effect is much more pronounced in individuals that never swear than those where profanity is a normal part of their vocabulary.
Another has offered you a source on swearing relieving pain.

Swearing simply conveys anger, including righteous anger. Saying "I'm furious with you!" simply does NOT communicate the same amount of anger.  And you have to have that rumbling low voice too.

Offline Open Heart

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Re: does anyone have a problem w/ swearing?
« Reply #54 on: Fri Mar 30, 2018 - 03:34:47 »
Do you mean to say that all negative emotions should be hidden?
Under normal circumstances, YES.  By normal circumstances, I mean that it is wrong to dump our negative emotions all over people in the grocery store, parking lot, dinner table.

There are proper places to let such things out:  private conversation with a confidant, one on one's with the source of the anger, confession with clergy, therapy wiith a counselor, you get the idea.

When not in one of those situations conducive to expressing anger, mature adults learn to control it and not vomit it all over innocent people.  Just because we have a thought or feeling doesn't give us the right to express it.

Offline MeMyself

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Re: does anyone have a problem w/ swearing?
« Reply #55 on: Fri Mar 30, 2018 - 09:49:54 »
Under normal circumstances, YES.  By normal circumstances, I mean that it is wrong to dump our negative emotions all over people in the grocery store, parking lot, dinner table.

There are proper places to let such things out:  private conversation with a confidant, one on one's with the source of the anger, confession with clergy, therapy wiith a counselor, you get the idea.

When not in one of those situations conducive to expressing anger, mature adults learn to control it and not vomit it all over innocent people.  Just because we have a thought or feeling doesn't give us the right to express it.

Thank you for explaining what you were saying.

I agree.  America, it seems has lost a bit of our coping skill ability.  We (believers and nonbelievers) vomit whatever we think and feel all over everyone...it bothers me more when its believers...because we are suppose to be seasoned with grace, but we sure like to condemn and gossip. :(

Offline th1b.taylor

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Re: does anyone have a problem w/ swearing?
« Reply #56 on: Yesterday at 16:56:11 »
th1b.taylor, I can't even imagine the awfulness of being raised as you've described and experienced. I'm so sorry you and your siblings had to live through that. So very sorry.
It is nothing that YHWH cannot handle and He has with two of us and we could never influence the others but that is our Elohim's Business then and now for they have Passed or disappeared.  Sometimes I think it has made me hard but Yashuah ha'Mashiah has and will use me as He wills.  Thank you.  Life is just a drink that comes in many flavors, some good but forgetful though awesome are awful and impossible to rid one's self of.  If we do our best, no matter how poorly, YHWH, will care for, grow and save... He did me in spite of the sin I learned as normal and still He is breaking and remolding this Old Piece of His Clay.

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