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Author Topic: HELP! A Christian decision about spanking my 4 year old.  (Read 4851 times)

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Offline Elsiespapa

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HELP! A Christian decision about spanking my 4 year old.
« on: December 21, 2008, 11:16:58 AM »
Hi, I am a Christian Father married with my first child, Elsie. She is going to turn 4 years old soon and her mother and I both agree on the disipinary action of spanking. Besides the occasional slap on the diaper, Elsie has never really gotten a full fledged spanking before, and I can already see that she is getting a bit too big for her britches. Her mother and I are wondering what other Christian parents do. We both have read Dr. Dobson, and we just dont know what we should do

(BY THE WAY : IF YOUR HERE TO HAVE A DIFFERENCE OF OPINION ABOUT SPANKING, GO AWAY. I parent my kids the way that I see fit based on what the bible says. You raise your kids your way, I will raise them my way. Now If your a christian parent who wants to help me then thank you :)  )

Here is the question. Dr. Dobson says not to use the hand for spankings because the hand should always be used in love, However I was spanked with the hand and I love my dad more than life itself. My wife however was always spanked with a paddle and a switch. She came out fine as well. We just dont know what we should do. We know you can get the point across with the hand , and there is a significantly smaller chance of leaving marks with the hand than and object like the paddle or switch. Also the bible references to using a "rod" which indicates an object. So I just dont know and neither does my wife. PLEASE if you are an expirenced CHRISTIAN parent, please help us out. We are rather young parents and well, I dont have to tell you how the world is raising their children, we are one of the only parents we know that actually spank their children so advice is hard to come by. PLEASE help us!

 

In Gods Love

Lexie and Kevin (18 and 23 yr with 3 year old daughter)
 ::amen!::

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HELP! A Christian decision about spanking my 4 year old.
« on: December 21, 2008, 11:16:58 AM »

Offline Charles Sloan

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Re: HELP! A Christian decision about spanking my 4 year old.
« Reply #1 on: December 21, 2008, 11:33:46 AM »
BY THE WAY : IF YOUR HERE TO HAVE A DIFFERENCE OF OPINION ABOUT SPANKING, GO AWAY.

Nice...

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Re: HELP! A Christian decision about spanking my 4 year old.
« Reply #1 on: December 21, 2008, 11:33:46 AM »

cristals mama

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Re: HELP! A Christian decision about spanking my 4 year old.
« Reply #2 on: December 22, 2008, 07:52:58 AM »
BY THE WAY : IF YOUR HERE TO HAVE A DIFFERENCE OF OPINION ABOUT SPANKING, GO AWAY.

Nice...

you said it- where is Christianity in that area, oh if we could only live in a world where everything was the way WE want (I I I, me me me and if you don't like it take a walk!), but that's right then we would be without God!    ::frown::

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Re: HELP! A Christian decision about spanking my 4 year old.
« Reply #2 on: December 22, 2008, 07:52:58 AM »

Offline chosenone

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Re: HELP! A Christian decision about spanking my 4 year old.
« Reply #3 on: December 22, 2008, 09:59:08 PM »
I dont think spanking is the way forward, but on the EXTREEMLY rare occsaions that I did smack my kids it was lightly on the bottom with a hand. other methods of discipline are far mor effectve though. My husabnd was beaten with the buckle end of a belt by his mum for quite small things and it makes me cringe with horror whenever I think about it.
if you can bear to be open minded, look in a concordance of the original meaning of the word 'rod' and where else it is used in the bIble becuase it is usually  used to mean general correction and discipline and not beating or hitting physically. Quite interesting actually.

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Re: HELP! A Christian decision about spanking my 4 year old.
« Reply #3 on: December 22, 2008, 09:59:08 PM »

Offline Bon Voyage

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Re: HELP! A Christian decision about spanking my 4 year old.
« Reply #4 on: December 22, 2008, 10:42:57 PM »
I dont think spanking is the way forward, but on the EXTREEMLY rare occsaions that I did smack my kids it was lightly on the bottom with a hand. other methods of discipline are far mor effectve though. My husabnd was beaten with the buckle end of a belt by his mum for quite small things and it makes me cringe with horror whenever I think about it.
if you can bear to be open minded, look in a concordance of the original meaning of the word 'rod' and where else it is used in the bIble becuase it is usually  used to mean general correction and discipline and not beating or hitting physically. Quite interesting actually.

Got any scriptures?

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Re: HELP! A Christian decision about spanking my 4 year old.
« Reply #4 on: December 22, 2008, 10:42:57 PM »



Offline BondServant

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Re: HELP! A Christian decision about spanking my 4 year old.
« Reply #5 on: December 23, 2008, 02:20:57 AM »
I used my hand on all three of my kids...now I get lots of compliments on how good they are ::smile::

In Christ,
KP

Offline chosenone

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Re: HELP! A Christian decision about spanking my 4 year old.
« Reply #6 on: December 23, 2008, 08:02:42 PM »
I dont think spanking is the way forward, but on the EXTREEMLY rare occsaions that I did smack my kids it was lightly on the bottom with a hand. other methods of discipline are far mor effectve though. My husabnd was beaten with the buckle end of a belt by his mum for quite small things and it makes me cringe with horror whenever I think about it.
if you can bear to be open minded, look in a concordance of the original meaning of the word 'rod' and where else it is used in the bIble becuase it is usually  used to mean general correction and discipline and not beating or hitting physically. Quite interesting actually.

Got any scriptures?

Yeh, look up in a good greek.hebrew concordance the word Rod and see how it is used. I havent got time now, but I have done it in the past.it is often used as a description for a general term for discipline and NOT hitting.

Offline BondServant

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Re: HELP! A Christian decision about spanking my 4 year old.
« Reply #7 on: December 23, 2008, 08:34:24 PM »
I dont think spanking is the way forward, but on the EXTREEMLY rare occsaions that I did smack my kids it was lightly on the bottom with a hand. other methods of discipline are far mor effectve though. My husabnd was beaten with the buckle end of a belt by his mum for quite small things and it makes me cringe with horror whenever I think about it.
if you can bear to be open minded, look in a concordance of the original meaning of the word 'rod' and where else it is used in the bIble becuase it is usually  used to mean general correction and discipline and not beating or hitting physically. Quite interesting actually.

Got any scriptures?

Yeh, look up in a good greek.hebrew concordance the word Rod and see how it is used. I havent got time now, but I have done it in the past.it is often used as a description for a general term for discipline and NOT hitting.

Rod:  Hebrew, shebet - rod, staff, branch, offshoot, club, sceptre

Sounds like a "switch" to me...

In Christ,
KP

Offline chosenone

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Re: HELP! A Christian decision about spanking my 4 year old.
« Reply #8 on: December 23, 2008, 09:03:41 PM »
I dont think spanking is the way forward, but on the EXTREEMLY rare occsaions that I did smack my kids it was lightly on the bottom with a hand. other methods of discipline are far mor effectve though. My husabnd was beaten with the buckle end of a belt by his mum for quite small things and it makes me cringe with horror whenever I think about it.
if you can bear to be open minded, look in a concordance of the original meaning of the word 'rod' and where else it is used in the bIble becuase it is usually  used to mean general correction and discipline and not beating or hitting physically. Quite interesting actually.

Got any scriptures?

Yeh, look up in a good greek.hebrew concordance the word Rod and see how it is used. I havent got time now, but I have done it in the past.it is often used as a description for a general term for discipline and NOT hitting.

Rod:  Hebrew, shebet - rod, staff, branch, offshoot, club, sceptre

Sounds like a "switch" to me...

In Christ,
KP

Its actually quite revealing if you look up where and in which context the word is used, and where is means general discipline for adults and not where God physcally hitting them.
i have always wondered if jesus would have hit or smacked any of the children that he came in contact with. I really dont think so.

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Re: HELP! A Christian decision about spanking my 4 year old.
« Reply #8 on: December 23, 2008, 09:03:41 PM »

Offline Bon Voyage

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Re: HELP! A Christian decision about spanking my 4 year old.
« Reply #9 on: December 23, 2008, 09:21:01 PM »
I dont think spanking is the way forward, but on the EXTREEMLY rare occsaions that I did smack my kids it was lightly on the bottom with a hand. other methods of discipline are far mor effectve though. My husabnd was beaten with the buckle end of a belt by his mum for quite small things and it makes me cringe with horror whenever I think about it.
if you can bear to be open minded, look in a concordance of the original meaning of the word 'rod' and where else it is used in the bIble becuase it is usually  used to mean general correction and discipline and not beating or hitting physically. Quite interesting actually.

Got any scriptures?

Yeh, look up in a good greek.hebrew concordance the word Rod and see how it is used. I havent got time now, but I have done it in the past.it is often used as a description for a general term for discipline and NOT hitting.

Please provide proof and scriptures.

Offline chosenone

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Re: HELP! A Christian decision about spanking my 4 year old.
« Reply #10 on: December 25, 2008, 10:57:52 PM »
I dont think spanking is the way forward, but on the EXTREEMLY rare occsaions that I did smack my kids it was lightly on the bottom with a hand. other methods of discipline are far mor effectve though. My husabnd was beaten with the buckle end of a belt by his mum for quite small things and it makes me cringe with horror whenever I think about it.
if you can bear to be open minded, look in a concordance of the original meaning of the word 'rod' and where else it is used in the bIble becuase it is usually  used to mean general correction and discipline and not beating or hitting physically. Quite interesting actually.

Got any scriptures?

Yeh, look up in a good greek.hebrew concordance the word Rod and see how it is used. I havent got time now, but I have done it in the past.it is often used as a description for a general term for discipline and NOT hitting.

Please provide proof and scriptures.

Do you not have  a concordance then?

Offline Bon Voyage

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Re: HELP! A Christian decision about spanking my 4 year old.
« Reply #11 on: December 25, 2008, 11:02:29 PM »
I dont think spanking is the way forward, but on the EXTREEMLY rare occsaions that I did smack my kids it was lightly on the bottom with a hand. other methods of discipline are far mor effectve though. My husabnd was beaten with the buckle end of a belt by his mum for quite small things and it makes me cringe with horror whenever I think about it.
if you can bear to be open minded, look in a concordance of the original meaning of the word 'rod' and where else it is used in the bIble becuase it is usually  used to mean general correction and discipline and not beating or hitting physically. Quite interesting actually.

Got any scriptures?

Yeh, look up in a good greek.hebrew concordance the word Rod and see how it is used. I havent got time now, but I have done it in the past.it is often used as a description for a general term for discipline and NOT hitting.

Please provide proof and scriptures.

Do you not have  a concordance then?

No, I don't.  Please provide scriptural backup for your assertion.

Offline chosenone

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Re: HELP! A Christian decision about spanking my 4 year old.
« Reply #12 on: December 26, 2008, 05:27:46 AM »
I dont think spanking is the way forward, but on the EXTREEMLY rare occsaions that I did smack my kids it was lightly on the bottom with a hand. other methods of discipline are far mor effectve though. My husabnd was beaten with the buckle end of a belt by his mum for quite small things and it makes me cringe with horror whenever I think about it.
if you can bear to be open minded, look in a concordance of the original meaning of the word 'rod' and where else it is used in the bIble becuase it is usually  used to mean general correction and discipline and not beating or hitting physically. Quite interesting actually.

Got any scriptures?

Yeh, look up in a good greek.hebrew concordance the word Rod and see how it is used. I havent got time now, but I have done it in the past.it is often used as a description for a general term for discipline and NOT hitting.

Please provide proof and scriptures.

Do you not have  a concordance then?

No, I don't.  Please provide scriptural backup for your assertion.

It isnt my assertion, it is what I have felt God is trying to say by the words in the bible and by what I have felt He has said to me personally. It doesnt bother me in the least what other people think, as long as they dont treat their children in a very abusive way and control what they do.
For me though I can see absoletly no reason for hitting a child when there are other extreemly effective ways of discipline. This is what I feel is right and after Christmas I will look up those verses but am in the middle of cooking a Boxing day meal for 7 people at the moment so am rather busy!!!I have 3 wonderful adult kids who are great so that proves it isnt necessary but that is my opinion.

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Re: HELP! A Christian decision about spanking my 4 year old.
« Reply #13 on: December 27, 2008, 08:39:31 PM »


(BY THE WAY : IF YOUR HERE TO HAVE A DIFFERENCE OF OPINION ABOUT SPANKING, GO AWAY. I parent my kids the way that I see fit based on what the bible says. You raise your kids your way, I will raise them my way. Now If your a christian parent who wants to help me then thank you :)  )



I'm sorry, I don't mean to be rude or harsh, but this makes no sense whatsoever.  You come here with this post asking about the appropriate way of spanking, claiming the Biblical mandate to spank,  but not wanting to be abusive only disciplinary, then asking others what is the appropriate way of spanking??


  ::beatingdeadhorse::

Well, if you tell people to "go away" who don't believe in spanking because of the Bible, why bother asking people here about what is appopriate spanking?  Just go to your same Bible and find out the answer.  Here, I'll help you.  You can thank me later:

Foolishness is bound in the heart of a child; but the rod of correction shall drive it far from him (Proverbs 22:15)

Oh, I know what some of you are going to say.  In fact, what some of you have already said by way of contortion and manipulation.  That the  "rod" is not an implement to beat children with,  but rather the interpretation of general discipline and correction.  Well, what a load of crap.  Is the "rod" a beating instrument?  You be the judge on this next proverb:

Withhold not correction from the child: for if thou beatest him with the rod, he shall not die. Thou shalt beat him with the rod, and shalt deliver his soul from hell (Proverbs 23:13-14).

"Thou shalt beat him with the rod" doesn't sound like mere general correction and guidance to me.

Now that we've established that, how much is appropriate spanking?  Considering you believe in it as it's in the Bible and wish for non spanking believers to go away?  Well, go back to your Bible then:


The blueness of a wound cleanseth away evil: so do stripes the inward parts of the belly (Proverbs 20:30).


Is that clear enough for you?  "Wounds" and "stripes" and "blueness".  In other words, the Bible says to beat children with a literal implement until welts are formed.

Like I said, no need to thank me.   ::smile::

Offline BondServant

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Re: HELP! A Christian decision about spanking my 4 year old.
« Reply #14 on: December 31, 2008, 09:02:55 PM »
Ok, here's the thing....the Bible CLEARLY advocates corporal punishment...you can read it directly, look to the Hebrew and look at it in context....it is crystal clear it is not only ok to spank your child, but a good from of punishment.  If you choose not to, that is ok as well, but please do not change God's Word to try and support your stance.

Every body is different...every parent and every child.  Some children spanking is effective, some children other forms are effective.  There is no 100% solution.

In Christ,
KP