Author Topic: Is 'talking dirty' ok?  (Read 8461 times)

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Offline Deborah4God

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Re: Is 'talking dirty' ok?
« Reply #30 on: March 01, 2012, 02:39:19 PM »
If it's between a man and wife and doesn't involve blaspheming I don't think there is anything wrong with this at all. Especially if it 'helps' them both :)

Offline JohnDB

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Re: Is 'talking dirty' ok?
« Reply #31 on: March 01, 2012, 07:45:48 PM »
I'm a happy camper so long as I don't have to hear any of it.

Offline JohnDB70X7

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Re: Is 'talking dirty' ok?
« Reply #32 on: March 03, 2012, 07:17:11 PM »
If I am repeating what another has posted, forgive me.

Hebrews 13:4 (NASB95)
4 Marriage is to be held in honor among all, and the marriage bed is to be undefiled; for fornicators and adulterers God will judge.

"Dirty talk" I can only imagine involves vocally expressing language or images (fantasies) of fornication or adultery. I will admit having been there and done that for many years until one day I realized that it was going against the Godly prescription for marriage (one man for one woman for one lifetime) and that role playing was not of Jack Kennedy seducing Jackie Kennedy (just to pick two names out of the past) but of Jack Kennedy and Marylin Monroe. Adultery.

It calls upon the depravity we all possess in our human nature.

So now you're the naughty school girl and the mean old principal alone in the detention in the classroom after hours. Fornication and pedophilia.

See my point?

And how about Fred seeing another cave woman and coming home to use Wylma as his fantasy device all the while thinking about the other cave woman. Lust in the heart (adultery).

We live in a world that muses itself with television shows called "Wife Swap." So we cannot expect much help from them along the lines of the Christian thing to do in such matters as the OP. They will tell you, in fact, that the Christian way is whack... outmoded, outdated, out of touch with reality... yet they also wonder why things are so rotten in the world and in marriage etc.

For some reason it is too easy to forget what a great experience it is when you really truly experience each other for who and what you are in the here and now and not some fantasy or lust for another...

As I said I did it the other way for years and the Lord's way is much much better!

It's like turning sex into masturbation when you do it the world's way.. just using your beloved's body to release sexual tension rather than truly truly making love to the love of your life your soul mate. No comparison.

If you disagree, you might want to check your spiritual barometer. We tend to drift off into worldliness even though we think we are not until something horrible happens and then we see the light...

Offline Barefoot88

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Re: Is 'talking dirty' ok?
« Reply #33 on: March 06, 2014, 09:58:17 AM »
I know this thread was written almost 2 years ago, but I can't help but comment on it because I just happened to come across it.
 I see so many people commenting and being judgmental...yet I have not heard one really use scripture that deals directly with the subject...what you are talking about is using words that we don't normally use in public because they are "sexual" words and therefore not appropriate. Do you think that talking about sexual intercourse or how it happened or describing the act was appropriate to say in public during biblical times? No. Yet, there is a whole book of the bible that describes Solomons love, his and her love making abilities.
 Remember people this is the marriage bed, God gave myself and my husband ultimate freedom to do what we like with one another's body. Granted he should treat me as Christ treats the church and I need to love and respect him, but that's not restriction...that is true love and true freedom. Talking dirty is not bad in the confines of marriage, talking dirty is exactly what Solomon did. It's a way to express your physical desires or what is actually taking place or what you would like to take place. Just because you are uncomfortable with it does not mean you should judge someone else and make them feel guilty for it. As long as their words are not hurting someone else then it's fine.
 Oh and using the "if you can't say it out in public then you shouldn't say it in the bedroom" thing, good grief...I can't rip my husbands clothes off and have sex with him in the middle of the street...good grief it's the marriage bed what's done/said in there should stay in there...have you know thinking ability?
 I almost wonder if half the people that answered this questions weren't single, or if they themselves were in a unsatisfying marriage. I don't know and I can't judge them, but I do know that I have read Song of Solomon and it is beautiful, but it will make you blush as do these "so-called" dirty words.
Rethink your "righteousness" people, quit being pharisees and let this woman have the pleasure that her husband seeks to give her...it is not wrong, it is wonderful , righteous and yes, even beautiful.

Offline chosenone

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Re: Is 'talking dirty' ok?
« Reply #34 on: March 06, 2014, 10:35:08 AM »
I think you need to be very careful of accusing those who don't agree with you of being in unsatisfying marriages. You know nothing about them. 
Sex can be amazing without resorting to using profanity, swearing or cussing. 

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Re: Is 'talking dirty' ok?
« Reply #34 on: March 06, 2014, 10:35:08 AM »



Offline Leanne

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Re: Is 'talking dirty' ok?
« Reply #35 on: March 20, 2014, 05:55:05 PM »
The topic has never come up I guess, I always thought that one would hold so much respect for their sexual partner for them to even think of some of the subjects that is brought up in 'dirty talk' would come across their mind.

Oh well ::shrug::

Online Wycliffes_Shillelagh

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Re: Is 'talking dirty' ok?
« Reply #36 on: March 21, 2014, 03:50:47 PM »
This thread suffers from an inability to define what "talking dirty" means.

One person made it role-playing.
Another made it using cuss words.

I wouldn't call either of those "talking dirty."  Isn't it when you describe what you are doing / are about to do?

Jarrod

Offline Texas Conservative

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Re: Is 'talking dirty' ok?
« Reply #37 on: March 22, 2014, 09:43:50 AM »
Or is it when you are farmers talking about fertilizing the field or mucking the stalls?

Offline DaveW

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Re: Is 'talking dirty' ok?
« Reply #38 on: March 24, 2014, 04:33:37 AM »
This thread suffers from an inability to define what "talking dirty" means.

It is using obscenities to describe what you want to do or what you want done to you.

Online Wycliffes_Shillelagh

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Re: Is 'talking dirty' ok?
« Reply #39 on: March 25, 2014, 01:59:27 AM »
This thread suffers from an inability to define what "talking dirty" means.
It is using obscenities to describe what you want to do or what you want done to you.
I can see where there would be a time and place for it, but on the whole, it makes for some pretty unimaginative pillow talk.

Online Wycliffes_Shillelagh

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Re: Is 'talking dirty' ok?
« Reply #40 on: March 25, 2014, 01:59:53 AM »
Or is it when you are farmers talking about fertilizing the field or mucking the stalls?
Wow.  You're into some really weird stuff.

Offline Red Baker

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Re: Is 'talking dirty' ok?
« Reply #41 on: March 25, 2014, 07:06:13 AM »
A friend asked me this question last night.  While in the middle of 'the act', her husband started taljung dirty.  To her complete surprise, she loved it and said everything was rather 'mind blowing'.  This is language he'd never use elsewhere...but later she felt guilty, that maybe it dishonoured God in some way?  I personally wasn't sure...but then if it's served to deepen their bond with each other, is it bad?  I wasn't sure how to advise...does anyone have any thoughts?

No corrupt communicating should ever proceed out of the mouth of a child of God, in bed or out of bed.  The bed is indeed undefiled between a man and his wife, and what they like and desire are allowable, but, not corrupt talking.

Ephesians 4:29

"Let no corrupt communication proceed out of your mouth, but that which is good to the use of edifying, that it may minister grace unto the hearer."

The Song of Solomon would be allowable within the bed room, (and outside) between a man and his wife. 

Offline chosenone

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Re: Is 'talking dirty' ok?
« Reply #42 on: March 25, 2014, 07:13:18 AM »
A friend asked me this question last night.  While in the middle of 'the act', her husband started taljung dirty.  To her complete surprise, she loved it and said everything was rather 'mind blowing'.  This is language he'd never use elsewhere...but later she felt guilty, that maybe it dishonoured God in some way?  I personally wasn't sure...but then if it's served to deepen their bond with each other, is it bad?  I wasn't sure how to advise...does anyone have any thoughts?

No corrupt communicating should ever proceed out of the mouth of a child of God, in bed or out of bed.  The bed is indeed undefiled between a man and his wife, and what they like and desire are allowable, but, not corrupt talking.

Ephesians 4:29

"Let no corrupt communication proceed out of your mouth, but that which is good to the use of edifying, that it may minister grace unto the hearer."

The Song of Solomon would be allowable within the bed room, (and outside) between a man and his wife. 



 I agree with this, if we don't use bad language or cursing or whatever in our everyday lives, how is it suddenly ok just because its in the bedroom?

Offline chosenone

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Re: Is 'talking dirty' ok?
« Reply #43 on: March 25, 2014, 07:17:01 AM »
This thread suffers from an inability to define what "talking dirty" means.

It is using obscenities to describe what you want to do or what you want done to you.

So why is that OK I wonder? For example take the 'F' word. I hate that word, and I hate hearing so many young people use it so casually, and how it is so frequently used in films and tv programmes. IF that is the sort of language that the OP was referring to, then I cant see how that is ok myself referring to the verse that Red quoted.  ::shrug::

Offline DaveW

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Re: Is 'talking dirty' ok?
« Reply #44 on: March 25, 2014, 09:46:00 AM »
So why is that OK I wonder? For example take the 'F' word. I hate that word, and I hate hearing so many young people use it so casually, and how it is so frequently used in films and tv programmes. IF that is the sort of language that the OP was referring to, then I cant see how that is ok myself referring to the verse that Red quoted.  ::shrug::

As I understand it, that is exactly what the OP would have been talking about.

Apparently some people find that language very arousing. (not me for sure!) 

While I may find it problematic, does using that language in the privacy of your own bedroom really meet the standard of what Paul meant when he wrote Ephesians 4:29? It is too easy to cherry pick a verse and define some word in it in a way that makes us very comfortable. But scripture is not designed to make us comfortable.  It is to goad us to seek HIM and His righteousness.

So if we define "unwholesome" as to preclude using the F bomb in private, that makes us comfortable.  But if that is not really what the author intended then we end up possibly putting a burden on someone that is not of God.

And that is my concern with discussions like this.