With respect bah-blah speaking of my own situation, my kids are aged 24, 29 and 32, so are definitely not little kids. Their lives were awful and now they are so much better with a step dad who loves them and  with 2 of them having come back to Jesus in a big way.That may not be the norm but it shows what God CAN do. The marriage break up happened 10 years ago and they have got better and better since then but it has been a long haul to get there for all of us, but with the marriage making SOOO much difference.
Also with respect my husband grew up in a marriage with constant conflict and it affected him very very deeply.There are two sides to every story.What is that verse that speaks of it being better to live on a roof top rather than live with a contentious wife. Could that not also apply to children?
OF COURSE it is better for kids to be in a loving home with 2 parents, but there are circumstances that make that impossible and sometimes down right dangerous and damaging.    I am definitely not advocating divorce for anything but the most serious reasons, such as sexual betrayal, but as well as that I AM saying that God can and does restore families and children and spouses who have been deeply hurt and one of the ways He sometimes does this is through another marriage.

 Bless you, its good to see that someone can appreciate Gods amazing work in others lives. 

Actually, the lead in paragraph indicates that the precipitants of divorce are lack of communication and distancing. The other topics, money, infidelity, sexual dysfunction, and major life changes are the touchstones of couple distress, but they can all be overcome if the couple will re-couple and talk about their different expectations in the relationship. Gottman and others would argue that even communication isn't the biggest issue. Underlying that problem is a lack of liking your partner. If the couple like each other sufficiently, they can overcome most obstacles.
Problem is, once we start distancing, the relationship is in big trouble.
On a slightly different note, this is why an hour of premarital "counseling" doesn't cut it. It's hard to cover those four touchstones to any significant degree in sixty minutes.

I agree, a hour sounds more like a formality to sate the conscience of whoever is doing the counseling. I have heard of some programs drawing out sessions for weeks at a time, but who know what it takes to prevent a divorce or to at least apprise the couple of what they are getting into.

Although if you have counseled me before I got married, there would have been little you could have done to dissuade me from my decision or to prepare me for the obstacles I have face in just our seven years of marriage.

 

So are you concerned that your wife would want to divorce you then?If not them why would it worry you that she read this story of redemption and restoration.

Actually with respect you missed MY point.

Divorce is horrible, painful, devastating and something that I wouldn't wish on my worst enemy. It is far far worse than bereavement in my opinion. I hate divorce but in the circumstances that I found myself in, there was no other option believe me. I spoke to three pastors/church leaders who all agreed with me.   I was married for 25 years when my divorce was over.
HOWEVER because my husband and I are both divorced (very much against what we would have wanted) and because God knows that we were faithful to our spouses and true to Him, He has blessed us and had restored to us all that we lost.    

However if a person divorces for no good reason,or has an affair, or leaves their spouse for another, or any other sinful thing, then God probably isn't going to bless them with another godly marriage. Neither my ex nor my husbands ex have anyone else, so they haven't been blessed in this way.

My point is that divorce isn't the end a persons life. Divorce is something that should only happen for extreme circumstances, BUT it is allowed for certain reasons.ALSO remarriage is allowed also,and God is the great restorer of all things. People that I know are praising God for what He has done for us. They give thanks to him for this. That doesn't mean that they are going to leave their husbands, How ridiculous. They know the terrible suffering that my kids and I went though. they rejoice with us at what God is doing. They see the amazing effects that this has had on us and our children. I Love that our story is giving God glory.
I am sorry if it offends anyone that we are happy and blessed,(in fact I am not sorry actually) but surely that is what God does. He blesses those who are faithful and act with dignity and fairness and faithfullness.

You keep talking about my 'lifestyle' I am a married women with three great kids and a great husband and I love God.  I try to be the best wife that I can the best mum that I can and the best friend that I can to my Friends.I Love being Gods precious daughter . So where does my 'lifestyle' fall short? I am doing what God had called me to do after very very difficult and painful things have happened in  my life.He has bought me into the light and to a wide open space and I make NO apologies for it.

chosenone-

My point is that Christian grandmothers are suppose to say things for the benefit of the younger generation. One of the reasons I have never been divorced is because I do no allow my wife to have non-christian girl friends who are into the Lib.  We as a couple do not associate with divorced couples either. One of the reasons you probably don't know much about the conservative christian life style is because those people have been avoiding you.  Ever think of that? 

 I see where you are coming from, but does that mean that I should deny or play down the miracle that God has done?. My marriage break up and the reason for it bought 6 years of hell.
I would never advise ANYONE to divorce. It is horrible, but sometimes it is the only option and sometimes the other spouse does the divorcing anyway,so that we have no choice as in my husbands case.
 God has bought me out of hell, out of darkness, and into a large place, it is s story of restoration and healing, and I want people to know what God has done. Does this mean that divorce isn't horrible and painful and ruins many lives? No it doesn't mean that at all.. It means that for some God can and will bring hope and healing and recovery through another marriage as he has done with me.
It may give hope to those who have been through terrible marriage break ups after betrayal or serious abuse and are treated really badly by some Christians (not talking about you here)as if they were lepers who must be avoided in case others 'catch' what they have. Its a good job that Jesus didn't feel like that when he met the women at the well.

yes there are those who divorce for no good reason such as my husbands ex wife who was told by her pastor that she had no reason to be divorcing him, and that is totally selfish and wrong and inexcusible. I am definitely NOT saying that ANYONE should divorce for such things, it is sinful and ungodly..

Ah, so anyone who has been through terrible times and suffering from what Satan has done in their lives is NOT allowed to tell anyone  that God is able to heal and  restore  to us what we have lost.  They are not allowed to give God the glory for the amazing things that He has done in their lives,even though the Bible actually says that God will restore to us ALL that the locusts have eaten. (I was actually given that verse 2 years before I met my wonderful husband)


I find this incredible. I love to hear stories of how God has changed and healed and delivered and restored. I love to hear of lives that have been in darknes bought into the light. I love to hear of people who have been in the pit who Jesus has bought out and put their feet on the rock.
He is a healing restoring and amazing God who LOVES to show just what He can do to make our lives new.He LOVES to give his children second chances and New beginnings.  Maybe you dont believe that He does that but the Bible is full of stories that tell a different story.