After talking to christian couples, it sure seems like God matches people together. But as a single christian myself, I certainly feel that the decision is only to be driven by ones own ambitions. If God does choose for you, how could he do that?
Not many votes yet.... Maybe this would have been a better thread for the Married people section of the forum! haha.
I didn't cast a vote because I kinda think it is a little of both.
I had previously voted, and I do think to a degree that He chooses for you. However, when you consider free will, He might have the perfect one selected for you, but you could decide to take things into your own hands and really screw things up. It is definitely a hard question to wrap your mind around, though.
It could be a hybrid, too. As He might have multiple people in mind but leave it entirely dependent on the two to choose each other. Yeah, I think I'll end here, because if I don't, I'll keep on talking in circles ::nodding::
Truth is: God SHOULD chose one's mate. But how many choose their own, because they get tired of waiting for God? Remember, it was God who said is wasn't good for Adam to be alone. So it was God who chose when Adam was supposed to be with a mate and who chose that mate for him.
Well, God chose and made the mate for Adam and look what happened.
So, I'm thinking, now, that God can make the perfect fit for you and you two can both take each other down.
I think the more immediately successful Christian couples were prepared by God for each other, and in walking with Him they enjoyed discovering who God had for them. But, also, I'd say ones can get in a major mess, first, even though God has specially chosen them for each other; but they need to get with God so they can enjoy all the good He has for them.
But there are ones who are attracted to each other because they are of the same wrong spirit, and then comes the major trouble that never stops. If God is not bringing us together, our own nature and personality can be like a magnet that attracts only what is of our own nature. And that iron of the magnet can weaken in its magnetic power, then get more and more corrupt.
So, I think I need to become how God really wants (1 Peter 3:4), so I can connect with someone who is really pleasing to Him, first. Do this, instead of trying to please myself ::doh:: I can be a sucker for charm and smart talk and Bible talking and attractive appearance, or for how someone suffering can make me to be the greatest counselor and compassionate person who would be such a great husband.
If you use the bait that can attract a sucker for sex, charm, financial security, and/or being spoiled, etc. (John 12:25), the bait you use can be what chooses the fish you catch ::smile::
He may help steer us in a direction, but we have free will and therefore we choose who we end up with. If God does the choosing then he's not letting us decide and therefore not letting us exercise free will.
My take on it, at least