Raising both genders

[dotterofzion]

A friend was saying how her son has missed having a male figure in his life. She's a single mother(divorced) whose husband has since remarried. Her son seems to be missing his father, he's a teenager and he's began hiding things from her, he acts good at home but she recently discovered he's in a gang and he was recently caught shop lifting, she's feeling helpless at the moment.
I think men should play a big role in raising their sons, and women should also play a big role in raising their daughters. Children need role models in their lives and parents should be their children's role models. God in His wisdom made the family to consist of man and woman. Our society is dysfunctional but what is essential is that as christians we should hold onto God's original idea of a real family.

[Helen]

You are absolutely right.  I essentially lost two of my sons in their teenage years after my ex walked out.  Fathers are unbelievably, incredibly important in the lives of both their sons and their daughters.  Watching either a son or a daughter struggle to come to adulthood without one of the parents or a grandparent or aunt or uncle taking the place of a missing parent is a heartbreaking experience.

[chosenone]

Both sexes need both parents. Does the boy have regular contact with his father? If he does that will make a huge difference.  Its hard to say if his behaviour is because his dad doesnt live with him, who knows if would have done that anyway, but if his dad is in his life that should help.

[dotterofzion]

Unfortunately, he hasn't seen his dad for about four years, since he moved to another state. My friend has always felt she could raise him on her own, but her son is growing and changing too, he is fourteen and quite big, he seems quite disrespectful towards her. Hangs out with his friends all the time and when he gets home he acts all nice and quiet but she knows he's pretending. Recently she found some money in his room and she feels he's been picking pockets...this is really sad.

[chosenone]

Unfortunately, he hasn't seen his dad for about four years, since he moved to another state. My friend has always felt she could raise him on her own, but her son is growing and changing too, he is fourteen and quite big, he seems quite disrespectful towards her. Hangs out with his friends all the time and when he gets home he acts all nice and quiet but she knows he's pretending. Recently she found some money in his room and she feels he's been picking pockets...this is really sad.

Yes it is sad. I was single mum of three for 6 years, and it isn't easy but many kids of single mums do very well. The teenage years are very often hard whether you have one parent or two, but he must feel very rejected if his dad moved away.

[Adeptus Astartes]

Hey there. I'm not on any authority to give any Christian advice, because I'm not one, however my mom raised me after I lost my dad hen I was 7 to cancer so if you have any specifics about a boy growing up without any other male figures in the house don't be afraid to ask. I ended up tacking onto friends, cousins and uncles for that sort of role, sure that didn't fill the gap left by my dad but nothing has so far.

[chosenone]

Hey there. I'm not on any authority to give any Christian advice, because I'm not one, however my mom raised me after I lost my dad hen I was 7 to cancer so if you have any specifics about a boy growing up without any other male figures in the house don't be afraid to ask. I ended up tacking onto friends, cousins and uncles for that sort of role, sure that didn't fill the gap left by my dad but nothing has so far.

Well I know a man who can.

[dotterofzion]

Adeptus, thanks for your offer. What do you suggest my friend can do to help her son?

[Adeptus Astartes]

Well does the kid have an uncle or older male siblings or cousins at all? If so and that kid is very comfortable with them than make sure they have plenty of access to that person which is what I generally did if I needed advice or just needed other company other than my mother and my sister or just needed advice abou things that I wasn't comfortable asking a female authority figure.

[joergehamilton]

I agreed children need role models in their life and parent are playing a role model in their lives. Therefore they used to learn things from their parents. It is tough for a lady to raise her children alone (single mother) or (divorce). A father and a mother both are important for a child; otherwise they are running in wrong track. I think that child needs support from the both; a mother can't fulfill the position of a father and a father can't fulfill the position of a mother.

[dotterofzion]

Tanks, I gave her your advice, and she has contacted her step-brother to help out a bit with her son. He's agreed to have him over for the weekends. We are keepin our fingers crossed.