Happiness

[Serenity432001]

I've heard some say God isn't concerned about our happiness and others say He is.  I've just been thinking lately about what is it that really makes me happy.  It's really embarrassing to admit this but I feel the need to just be really honest here and would like honest feed back.

Right not, I consider myself to be happier than I've been in a long time.  A couple  of years ago, I wasn't so happy and the reason in the difference is people weren't behaving the way I wanted them to when I was unhappy.  Now, things are pretty smooth and my life is fairly easy.  I know though that this too shall pass because life is change and I'm not always going to get my way.  Intellectually I know that the only true joy is in Jesus and because of Him and when I put my faith, hope, and trust in Him then even if things are not going my way, I can still be happy.   That happiness I believe God does want for us.  The kind where I'm just happy when I get my way, probably not so much. 

What Id like to hear is how others here are able to have joy even in the midst of pain and not getting your way or if anyone else here struggles with this like I do.

Thanks

[HRoberson]

Here is a rather brief response to your question.

I believe God would want us to be happy, but not at the expense of faithful living - which includes submitting to others. Nor are we expected to be happy while burying our loved ones, or being fired, or filing bankruptcy, or learning that our mate is cheating on us. It would be nice if we didn't have to go through any of that, but God isn't going to keep it from happening simply to keep us happy.

Suffering, not getting our way, being hurt, frustrated, and angered are all things we really cannot do without. If our lives were really so happy go lucky, how would we learn to minister (submit) to others? Everyone would be ministering to us.

Being happy, being content, being confident in who we are comes from identifying with God and His leading in this world. As our focus shifts from getting what I want to what can I do for someone else (in a healthy rather than dysfunctional way), we come to find happiness and contentment in doing God's work. That does not mean that I like everything that happens to me, or the frustrations, or the losses. What it does mean is that I receive my satisfaction from being the person I know I'm supposed to be - the person I was made to be - the person I am.

That does not mean that I relish living in misery every day, but it does mean that I try and see people - even pains in the butt - as people created by God. I try and see that in them is the image of God and I am called to serve. In the happenstances of life, I look to ministering to others, I ask "what could I be doing now, or what could I be learning from this experience?"

I gain satisfaction and happiness from learning more about people, the creation, God, and in doing what He has called me to do and be. I am convinced that He has called me to work His will in this life, and I find joy in doing that.

[Serenity432001]

I love that HR.  Thanks so much for sharing.  I just got through watching the movie, World Trade Center, and there was a scene where they were going in to get the two police officers who were still alive and one guy says to another, now I want you to know before you go in there that this building could fall some more and we could all die and the guy said, Look, since I got out of rehab, I've found out that helping people is the only thing I'm good at.  I'm going in.   I just thought that was cool!

[k-pappy]

I believe that God does want us to be happy, or rather, filled with joy...His joy.  I do not think it is His will for us to be happy all  the time, or due to what we own or how much stuff we have.  Rather, His joy comes from submitting to Him.  It is not an easy thing to do, especially when there are things we need to give up in order to do so.  I don't mean tangible things either, rather things that can block our joy.

First and foremost, we can only have that joy when we spend time regularly with Him.  That is where the giving things up comes in.  Certain things in our lives can block us from spending time in His presence.  Usually those are the toughest to give up, but when we do, the reward is beyond words!

In my own situation, I first had to give up the need to make the other man pay.  For a long time I was fighting this lawsuit for just that reason.  He wronged me, he wronged my family and I wanted him to pay for what he did.  It took a lot of effort on my part, and much more time than it should have, but eventually, finally, I was able to give that up.  I no longer felt the desire to make him pay for what he did.  That was the very beginning.

Once I did that, I was able to start praying again.  I had long struggled with doing my quiet time, and that allowed me to at least start back on the right track.  There was more of course, but I would not learn until, well, just recently, and not on my own, but with the help of a very caring and VERY patient Christ-sibling.  Shortly after the "spiritual extortion" thread, she pm'd me and asked how the concept of unity could apply to the situation with the lawsuit.

I have to be honest, my first thought was "there was no way."  It simply was not possible to have unity in this case.  She encouraged me to pray and fast, something I now had the ability but was still lacking the discipline to do.  I decided to make a weekend of it.  "GodCon '07" if you will.  I devoted the entire weekend to Him, and I was amazed at the results!!  First, I came to another realization.  Probably old hat to most of you, but it was revolutionary to me:  I had to give up the need to be "right."  Suddenly the initial question made sense!  How could I apply unity to my current situation?

By giving up the need to be right.  I think that is the key.  God knows the score, he knows my heart, he knows my failings, even though I feel wronged I need to give up the need to be right.  Jesus was definitely in the right and He gave up the need to be right.  He could have shown all of them who He was with all the power of Heaven, and He submitted...humbly submitted to a situation that was far, FAR worse than what we are going through.  I need to do the same exact thing...I need to emulate Christ in my own situation.  It isn't easy, either...I feel "right" this man did so many "wrongs" and I want everyone to know I am "right," but why?  Really?  Why do have to be right?  So I win the case?  Why not just give that up to God and let Him handle it?  Jesus did...yes He was crucified, but that was all part of God's plan.  I am not sure what God's will is in my case, but I am ready to submit to it, no matter what it is.  All I had to do was surrender the need to be right.  Once I did that, I could feel the difference!  It was amazing!!  And get this, once I did that, the situation all but took care of itself!  One way or another the whole situation will be resolved in the next few weeks.  No matter which way things go, I am trusting my Father and I know that it will be His will.

There is one more caveat to that though...once we give things up and submit to our Father, we need to let HIM keep them.  This past weekend, I made the mistake of taking some of that back.  I thought of all sorts of things I could do to show and prove that I was "right."  Well, not only did I have a major case of the grumpies, I could not pray.  Seriously...on saturday I had two hours of quiet all to myself, and I simply could not pray.  I could feel a definite barrier...the next day I realized what it was, I had taken back the need to be right.  I immediately gave it back to God and asked His forgiveness.  It was like flipping a switch.  The release was both immense and immediate!

Now, finally, for the first time in I don't know how long, I can go before my Father and submit myself totally to Him.  I can walk with Him in a way I have not been able to in a very long time.  I have so much more to learn, and I am sure there are other things for me to surrender, but at least, now, I can do so, and because of what I gave up and because I can and am walking with my Father, I have a joy that was missing, a joy that had disappeared.  I know that even if things go south again, I will still have this joy because God is in control.  Win or lose, best case or worst case, God will take care of my family and I, and that is what counts. 

That I believe is what God wants for us, joy, and how we can get it, but giving up what is hindering us and submitting ourselves to Him.

KP

[Serenity432001]

Thanks KP

I really see you becoming more and more like Him.  Your honesty and openness is just so cool and helpful to others for you to share.   Yours and HR's post have helped me so much.  I'm really wanting to just be happy in Jesus.  Not happy because of my circumstances necessarily but happy in spite of them at times.  Like I said, things are going well right now but there is always that threat as far as well, what if this happens or that happens and I'm tired of not being able to just enjoy the moment and trust God and know that this or that might very well happen but God is in control and He knows the bigger picture.  I guess it is just dawning on me that I am still letting outside forces rule my happiness rather than allowing it to be completely and totally from God.  I so want to be like Paul where I am content in ALL situations.  And, I believe this can only be done when we trust Him and not ourselves.

Blessings

Lisa P