singlehood help (I'm a guy btw)

[wolflet7]

Okay, first off I just want to mention that I talk to God on a regular basis and a couple months ago, He told me that I will get married and the girl will be perfect for me.  The problem: I want a girlfriend now!!!

I want to date within my High School Youth Group, but sometimes it feels like I'm the only Christian who really wants to wait.  An example; I had a crush on the Youth Pastor's daughter (2 years ahead of me) and we talked once in awhile and that was enough to fall for her.  Her love for God attracted me.  But...when our Youth Group went caroling a couple weeks ago, she got in a car alone with 3 other guys, one of which was her ex-boyfriend and they showed up 20-30 minutes late 2 times. 

I know I can trust God, that He has a girl waiting for me somewhere, but it's really hard to hang on.   

[Jon-Marc]

Well, waiting on the Lord can be difficult, but it can also be rewarding. Unfortunately, it took me until I was past 50 to learn that lesson. I hope it won't take you that long. I knew a man who went ahead of the Lord and did what he wanted--thinking it was God's will. It didn't work out because he didn't ask God what He wanted.

[Pokhara]

You say that God spoke to you.  This has never happened to me.  I hope that you can be sure that what you heard really was the voice of God.

Consider Abraham.  He wanted a son, but his wife was barren.  Eventually he fathered a son by his wife's maidservant, but that only caused more problems for him later on.

Don't rush into anything.  If God is making you wait, then assume that He has a good reason for doing so.

[kristinaf]

Dude, I hear ya!!!  It is very difficult when you want something to happen really badly and it hasn't happened yet.  I am in exactly the same boat as you!!! I desire a husband who is a Christian and has similar values, i.e. wants to wait for marriage.  Slim pickins!  But I too, feel that I got a message from God (thru my Pastor) that said I will find someone to marry.  I think you are right, that you did hear from God, just like I think I did.  I hope God brings the right person to you...just as I hope He brings the right person to me.  We just have to be patient and trust that the right person is right around the corner.  By the way, I just started going on some free Christian dating/friendship sites.  Have you checked any of them out?  I don't know if they work yet.  I will keep you posted!!!  But yes, I feel your pain, it is not easy being single!!!

Love, Kristina   

[wolflet7]

Well Kristina, I personally think that if God wanted me to date a girl, then He will allow us to introduce ourselves in person rather than on the internet.  It's like buying something you really want.  You see a commercial for it and think it's really good, but then, when you get it, you have some problems with it.  If you see the product in action when you are first introduced to it, you have a better decision/understanding for the product. 

Pokhara, the first time God spoke to me was at Youth Camp during the summer of my 8th grade year, going into freshman year.  I was listening to the lesson and I was kind of tired, so I put my head onto my hands and just thought about things.  Then, this voice, nothing deep or whatever, just a simple voice started talking to me.  It was peaceful and I knew that it was the Lord when I first heard it.  The next day at around the same time, He spoke to me again and every time it felt like I was in a room with no doors or walls and it was dark, besides the light coming from Him.  It felt like I was in that room with Him, just the two of us.  A few weeks later, He started talking to me more often and at least once every week from then on, He started talking to me.  I guess you just have to focus your mind but not try to and He will introduce Himself first.  So, in other words, I kind of surrendered my mind. 

Jon-Marc, what happened to that man?

[admin]

Okay, first off I just want to mention that I talk to God on a regular basis and a couple months ago, He told me that I will get married and the girl will be perfect for me.  The problem: I want a girlfriend now!!!

I want to date within my High School Youth Group, but sometimes it feels like I'm the only Christian who really wants to wait.  An example; I had a crush on the Youth Pastor's daughter (2 years ahead of me) and we talked once in awhile and that was enough to fall for her.  Her love for God attracted me.  But...when our Youth Group went caroling a couple weeks ago, she got in a car alone with 3 other guys, one of which was her ex-boyfriend and they showed up 20-30 minutes late 2 times. 

I know I can trust God, that He has a girl waiting for me somewhere, but it's really hard to hang on.  

I'm kind of thinking the same thing another brother said on this thread. God's never spoken to me. I must admit I'm skeptical when people say that. Secondly, just because the girl hangs out with other guys and has been late a few times is not a sign she's ungodly. It sounds like she's got a social life. Make friends with her friends and make friends of your own. Not only will it help you if you want to be with her, but it will just be good for you in general.

Don't over analyze. Just relax and enjoy the ride.

[admin]

Well Kristina, I personally think that if God wanted me to date a girl, then He will allow us to introduce ourselves in person rather than on the internet. 

Really? What verse is that? I think that God is powerful enough and creative enough that He can use all kinds of avenues to bring people together. If God wants to use the Internet to bring you the love of your life, would you reject it because God used the Internet? God is cutting edge bro!

[wolflet7]

Okay, first off I just want to mention that I talk to God on a regular basis and a couple months ago, He told me that I will get married and the girl will be perfect for me.  The problem: I want a girlfriend now!!!

I want to date within my High School Youth Group, but sometimes it feels like I'm the only Christian who really wants to wait.  An example; I had a crush on the Youth Pastor's daughter (2 years ahead of me) and we talked once in awhile and that was enough to fall for her.  Her love for God attracted me.  But...when our Youth Group went caroling a couple weeks ago, she got in a car alone with 3 other guys, one of which was her ex-boyfriend and they showed up 20-30 minutes late 2 times. 

I know I can trust God, that He has a girl waiting for me somewhere, but it's really hard to hang on.   

I'm kind of thinking the same thing another brother said on this thread. God's never spoken to me. I must admit I'm skeptical when people say that. Secondly, just because the girl hangs out with other guys and has been late a few times is not a sign she's ungodly. It sounds like she's got a social life. Make friends with her friends and make friends of your own. Not only will it help you if you want to be with her, but it will just be good for you in general.

Don't over analyze. Just relax and enjoy the ride.

Well, I know for a fact that it was God.  He has performed many miracles in my life.  After the first time He spoke to me, His presence and even His voice was enough to have me literally shaking for an hour.  To be honest, I don't know why God spoke and still speaks to me.  When He and I were in our first conversation, I asked Him why He spoke to me.  He said that I was most like Him, for some odd reason.  I even asked some of my friends a few months ago if they've ever talked to God and their experience has been the same as mine.  God is very confusing to us.  When we try to understand Him, it's like trying to find the last digit of pi, but we're like 2+2=4 to Him. 

[wolflet7]

Well Kristina, I personally think that if God wanted me to date a girl, then He will allow us to introduce ourselves in person rather than on the internet.

Really? What verse is that? I think that God is powerful enough and creative enough that He can use all kinds of avenues to bring people together. If God wants to use the Internet to bring you the love of your life, would you reject it because God used the Internet? God is cutting edge bro!

Well, it's not that I'm saying it's horrible or sinful or anything, it's just that women are the pursued and the men are the pursuers (that actually is a verse).  So, if I submit information of myself on an online Christian dating service, then most likely the first few matches or maybe even all of them have had an account before me.  In other words, they have pursued first instead of me pursuing them first.  I know you can think of it the other way around, but I, as a minor, don't feel comfortable yet with that in mind.  If I am going to be a pastor, then I can't have a reputation of going on online Christian dating services.  That would be a bad example of patience cause most likely the first few matches will possibly keep you busy for life, if you know what I mean.  That would be the easy way out.  I will keep my faith in God and pray about these online Christian dating services.  If He is telling me to go for it, then I will.  But for now, I will keep my faith in God that He has the perfect one for me at the perfect time.

[bemark]

Okay, first off I just want to mention that I talk to God on a regular basis and a couple months ago, He told me that I will get married and the girl will be perfect for me.  The problem: I want a girlfriend now!!!

I want to date within my High School Youth Group, but sometimes it feels like I'm the only Christian who really wants to wait.  An example; I had a crush on the Youth Pastor's daughter (2 years ahead of me) and we talked once in awhile and that was enough to fall for her.  Her love for God attracted me.  But...when our Youth Group went caroling a couple weeks ago, she got in a car alone with 3 other guys, one of which was her ex-boyfriend and they showed up 20-30 minutes late 2 times. 

I know I can trust God, that He has a girl waiting for me somewhere, but it's really hard to hang on.  

Well it looks to me that God has shown you that maybe she is not the girl for you    Are your eyes more open now

Hear what the Lord Is showing you  and do not let your emotions and feelings rule your life    You will need all that when you finally get to be with the one that God has for you

[chosenone]

Well Kristina, I personally think that if God wanted me to date a girl, then He will allow us to introduce ourselves in person rather than on the internet. 

Really? What verse is that? I think that God is powerful enough and creative enough that He can use all kinds of avenues to bring people together. If God wants to use the Internet to bring you the love of your life, would you reject it because God used the Internet? God is cutting edge bro!

Amen and amen
I met my wonderful husband on a British internet dating/friendship site, and my son has met a wonderful Christian girl also this way, and when they are able they want to marry. Both my husband and my sons girlfriend are wonderful lovely godly people. I also know at least two other couples who have met this way. There is nothing ungodly about it at all. I would never have met my wonderful husband if I hadnt gone onto the internet site.I would recommend it to anyone although you sound very young so maybe wait for a while.

[wolflet7]

Well, it does seem that Internet dating is "the thing" nowadays.  I'm just going to put all my faith in God and maybe He'll show me a sign that tells me that I should/n't go on an online Christian dating service.  I'm going to start praying about it everyday 

[+Jonathan+]

Well, it does seem that Internet dating is "the thing" nowadays.  I'm just going to put all my faith in God and maybe He'll show me a sign that tells me that I should/n't go on an online Christian dating service.  I'm going to start praying about it everyday 

If God really did reveal to you that you are going to be married, be patient and wait upon the Lord. An online Christian dating service actually sounds like a very good idea to me, you should go for it.

[wolflet7]

Well, funny thing.  God told me, while I was taking a shower, that I should wait until I was 23 years old to go on the online Christian dating sites.  Although, He said that once I hit 23 years old, I'll already have a "curve ball" thrown at me (possibly another girl?).  After that, He wouldn't really tell me much.  God is VERY confusing!

[+Jonathan+]

I've felt like I've had revelations from God many times before in my life, but I have problems with depression, so it's possible it was just my own thoughts running wild. Psychology is also confusing, I can't be sure if God is really talking to me or not...

[wolflet7]

I know what you mean Nintendo, I kind of feel the same way, but then there are times when He really does talk to me and I can tell the difference.  Our church's pastor taught us a lesson on imaginative prayer and it was really interesting.   

[lismore]

The most important thing is whether you are single, or married, short or tall, old or young is to serve God now.

I know what you're all talking about, I'm single too, been through the same moments of wondering, who, where, when.  But remember, one day Jesus will return.  Hopefully in our lifetime, perhaps soon.  The bible says 'comfort one another with these words'.
Jesus is coming!

[chosenone]

Well, funny thing.  God told me, while I was taking a shower, that I should wait until I was 23 years old to go on the online Christian dating sites.  Although, He said that once I hit 23 years old, I'll already have a "curve ball" thrown at me (possibly another girl?).  After that, He wouldn't really tell me much.  God is VERY confusing!

yeh. God never tells us too much does he, just enough to keep us guessing! He is very good at that!

[HonoredbyGod]

I know what you mean Nintendo, I kind of feel the same way, but then there are times when He really does talk to me and I can tell the difference.  Our church's pastor taught us a lesson on imaginative prayer and it was really interesting.   

Imaginative prayer is new age occultism disguised as Christianity.  It's based on a mind over matter philosophy that Napoleon Hill proliferated in the United States.  Since then it has become entrenched in everyday reading and instruction secularly and in Christian circles.

Meditative techniques and imaginative prayer are based on pagan techniques for communicating with spirits.  It could be that the "God" you are hearing is actually a demon instructing you.  Be very careful.

I've never had God directly speak to me in in audible voice.  Nor have I ever had to use meditative techniques, my imagination or candle techniques to communicate with God.  Read your Bible if you want God's advice.

For more information on this from a Christian perspective check out The Seduction of Christianity by Dave Hunt.  Or listen to some of his Youtube videos.

Hope this helps, I'm not trying to be condemning.  I'm actually really worried about Christianity today and I really want to get the word out about the deceit of Satan in our everyday lives.

[wolflet7]

I know what you mean Nintendo, I kind of feel the same way, but then there are times when He really does talk to me and I can tell the difference.  Our church's pastor taught us a lesson on imaginative prayer and it was really interesting.   

Imaginative prayer is new age occultism disguised as Christianity.  It's based on a mind over matter philosophy that Napoleon Hill proliferated in the United States.  Since then it has become entrenched in everyday reading and instruction secularly and in Christian circles.

Meditative techniques and imaginative prayer are based on pagan techniques for communicating with spirits.  It could be that the "God" you are hearing is actually a demon instructing you.  Be very careful.

I've never had God directly speak to me in in audible voice.  Nor have I ever had to use meditative techniques, my imagination or candle techniques to communicate with God.  Read your Bible if you want God's advice.

For more information on this from a Christian perspective check out The Seduction of Christianity by Dave Hunt.  Or listen to some of his Youtube videos.

Hope this helps, I'm not trying to be condemning.  I'm actually really worried about Christianity today and I really want to get the word out about the deceit of Satan in our everyday lives.

I think you might have misunderstood me.  By imaginative prayer, I don't mean trying to pray differently.  For example, I wouldn't try to cross everything on my body - fingers, legs, whatever - as imaginative prayer.  I simply mean that we should use our imagination when we pray, such as I pray for a new friend in the next few weeks to help me with my problem, although I doubt somebody will move in this small little town, yet somebody might.  That's what I mean by imaginative prayer, not meditating. 

When God speaks to mean, it's - well, it's very difficult to explain, but I'll do my best.  It's not like I suddenly hear His booming voice rise over the heavens and declare what should be done this instant.  No, not like that at all.  He actually talks through my thoughts/mind/soul.  He's told me things such as, "Your friend has arrived" and guess who!  Stuff like that.  Once in awhile, He'll tell me things that will happen in the future, as stated above.   

[HonoredbyGod]

Ah I see well I mistook what you said because "imaginative prayer" is actually a form of prayer being taught in some Christian churches today.  It involves meditative praying in order to "experience" Christ.  It's very dangerous as it connects people with the spiritual plane and can open people up to spirits pretending to be God.

Check out Dave Hunt's YouTube videos about his book the Seduction of Christianity if you're interested.

[revd_tstar]

Well Kristina, I personally think that if God wanted me to date a girl, then He will allow us to introduce ourselves in person rather than on the internet. 

Really? What verse is that? I think that God is powerful enough and creative enough that He can use all kinds of avenues to bring people together. If God wants to use the Internet to bring you the love of your life, would you reject it because God used the Internet? God is cutting edge bro!

I agree... with both of you. I believe God is strong enough to work through the internet... I mean with Al Gore's help, he invented it (John 1:3). So, He probably knows how to bring people together through it. Living in such a small community, and being ordained, my options for dating in my community are extremely limited. Although I am not a Roman Catholic, I'm also not considered available. So, online dating seems to be an option for me.

However, I feel skeptical of internet dating. It sounds creepy. But that's probably the ultra-conservativeness from my community influencing that skepticism.

Wolfe, you are young. You have plenty of life left. I'm 35 and still waiting. It is difficult. Don't do what Abraham did, if he promised you a girl, then wait for her. Abraham took matters into his own hands and we are still seeing the affects of that thousands of years later. Hang in there.

[chosenone]

Well Kristina, I personally think that if God wanted me to date a girl, then He will allow us to introduce ourselves in person rather than on the internet. 

Really? What verse is that? I think that God is powerful enough and creative enough that He can use all kinds of avenues to bring people together. If God wants to use the Internet to bring you the love of your life, would you reject it because God used the Internet? God is cutting edge bro!

I agree... with both of you. I believe God is strong enough to work through the internet... I mean with Al Gore's help, he invented it (John 1:3). So, He probably knows how to bring people together through it. Living in such a small community, and being ordained, my options for dating in my community are extremely limited. Although I am not a Roman Catholic, I'm also not considered available. So, online dating seems to be an option for me.

However, I feel skeptical of internet dating. It sounds creepy. But that's probably the ultra-conservativeness from my community influencing that skepticism.

Wolfe, you are young. You have plenty of life left. I'm 35 and still waiting. It is difficult. Don't do what Abraham did, if he promised you a girl, then wait for her. Abraham took matters into his own hands and we are still seeing the affects of that thousands of years later. Hang in there.

Why does it sound creepy to meet someone on the internet? I know lots of people who met someone this way including myself and my son. I have been happily married for 4 years and  my son will probably marry next year.For Christians it is a good idea becuase you so rarely meet any other Christians apart from at your church, and if there is no one there who is your age and single then what hope is there?

[wolflet7]

 and if there is no one there who is your age and single then what hope is there?
[/quote]

Trusting in the Lord of course.

[chosenone]

and if there is no one there who is your age and single then what hope is there?

Trusting in the Lord of course.
[/quote]

Yes but trusting in the Lord doesnt mean doing nothing yourself. He does expect us to use our common sense and to get on with things ourselves. If I had sat at home waiting for God to plonk a man in my lap, I would still be single and alone. As it is, I have the most wonderful amazing husband that I could ever have hoped for. he is everything that I asked God for and more. I  had to make the effort to go onto an internet site and I also was the one who e-mailed my husband first.I can never understand some women who say that they would never show a man that they are interested but always wait for the man to do something. Well, I have news for these women, they may have a very long wait if they use this approach.
Go for it girls I say, you never know who you may find.

[wolflet7]

You're right.  Us guys don't want to do all the hard work ourselves.  We also want women to show their interest in us, not just wait for us to go to them. 

[garethfj]

Hi guys. This is my first post, but all I know is to put God first and seek Him, and everything will happen naturally. Just maybe we are hindering Him from giving us a relationship because weve not got our priorities right & just how good would a relationship based on idolitry be. I know becoase I did it and almost committed suicide as a result. Go to God about it, and then let it go, put Him first in everything if you arent already.

Hope this is of some help, but hope it doesnt sound to harsh, but don't know what other way to say it! L)

[fanuvmxpx]

Why does it sound creepy to meet someone on the internet? I know lots of people who met someone this way including myself and my son. I have been happily married for 4 years and  my son will probably marry next year.For Christians it is a good idea becuase you so rarely meet any other Christians apart from at your church, and if there is no one there who is your age and single then what hope is there?

Its actually impossible to meet on the internet because that's not actually them...unless you consider your keyboard, mouse & monitor your lover. I was introduced to my wife on myspace...I met her at Vanguard University.

And for you single men that want tips. Just go and talk to the women...small talk...ask them how they are. They are God's treasures, and so are we, so know your self worth in Christ and be bold to politely pursue to get your rib back. Happy Hunting.