Dating joys.

[fcadcock]

Ahh the joys of dating...  And the Marys, and the Susan, and the Jennifers.... 

I just started dating a girl who is 21, I am 27.  Neither of us have had any issues with the age difference other than me laughing once when she asked where I was on 9/11 and our answers were a bit shocking to me.  (I was taking an economics test in my freshman year of college.  She was in 6th grade English class.)

Aside from the age, there are lots of other issues where we don't quite meet eye to eye either.

*She has not dated in the past three years, and has only dated 4 people other than me.  I have dated more than 4 people in the past three years.  (if you count people I just went out with once or twice, I've dated that many people in the past 9 months)

*She is a virgin, I am not.  She is saving herself for marriage and even before my marriage (I was married for almost a year) I wasn't a virgin.

*She lives 2 hours east of me.  I live two hours west of her.

*And the worst part.  She is a fan of the Jets, the Braves, and Ole Miss.  I like better teams: Saints, Mets (ok, so they may not be better), and Southern Miss.

Out of all of this, I wake up every morning constantly surprised that she is dating me.  She is a soft skinned angel who has never done drugs, never had sex, and never been drunk.  I am a heavily tattooed former pothead who has slept with more people than she has kissed and spent a few years of my life shooting terrorists in the face for a living.  I have never dated anyone who without trying, or even saying a word, has made me feel so guilty or shameful about who I was before I met them.  I have also never dated someone who I felt as comfortable holding in my arms as her.

I don't know that there is much of a question here.  I tend to just use this site as a place to vent my insecurities or problems.  But I'll ask a question anyways.  Are there any other guys out there who have had successful relationships with women who were much less sinful (Or maybe more sheltered/better people/whatever she is in comparison to me)?  Are there tattooed, former potheads or killers (lawful or otherwise) out there who have good relationships with great southern baptist women of faith?

[JohnDB]

Yep...

Tell ya what. Just be honest with her. Tell her when you feel like you don't measure up to her. Doesn't mean that you can't lead her...just means that you haven't been perfect. (Only Jesus was)

I think you will find out that things will work out just fine.

[fassopony]

Relax and enjoy LOL!!

Oh, and your "better" team got their butts handed to them by one of the worst NFL teams of all time Saturday.  You may want to rethink your position!

[fcadcock]

Hey, it's not always about winning.  I'd rather lose in NOLA than win in Minnesota or Pittsburg.  The partying is much better in New Orleans...

And to John, don't worry.  I've been honest with her.  She knows about my past.  Maybe not every story, but she knows the stories exist.  Surprisingly when the sex topic came up she actually didn't want to know how many people I had been with. She seems to like me for who I am now, not who I was then.  (to be fair, the majority of the bad stuff was done before I was her age and I have grown up quite a bit since.

[Lumpee]

Hi Fca..if I may...

1st off..the Mets?...arggh!...there is a real team right across town...

A) I'd just thank God that he gave me a gift of such quality. There is no gift that he gives us that we can measure up to... why would a woman be any different?

or

B) Just give it some time...her faults will show up. They always do. 

[fcadcock]

Hi Fca..if I may...

1st off..the Mets?...arggh!...there is a real team right across town...


B) Just give it some time...her faults will show up. They always do. 

Just like yours did?  The Yankees?  Ick!

[bayou boy]

Hmm, a successful relationship with a woman, I wouldn't know too much about that.The longest I have been able to have a girlfriend for is six months.   

[comfy]

Play the ball as it lies.

[Apothecary 4 Christ]

  Are there any other guys out there who have had successful relationships with women who were much less sinful (Or maybe more sheltered/better people/whatever she is in comparison to me)?  Are there tattooed, former potheads or killers (lawful or otherwise) out there who have good relationships with great southern baptist women of faith?

The Lord commanded Hosea to marry a harlot (Hosea 1:2).

These things can work out.



Blessings.  And congratulations.  I married a Northern Presbyterian.  She was, and still is, better than me....

[LightHammer]

Ahh the joys of dating...  And the Marys, and the Susan, and the Jennifers.... 

I just started dating a girl who is 21, I am 27.  Neither of us have had any issues with the age difference other than me laughing once when she asked where I was on 9/11 and our answers were a bit shocking to me.  (I was taking an economics test in my freshman year of college.  She was in 6th grade English class.)

Aside from the age, there are lots of other issues where we don't quite meet eye to eye either.

*She has not dated in the past three years, and has only dated 4 people other than me.  I have dated more than 4 people in the past three years.  (if you count people I just went out with once or twice, I've dated that many people in the past 9 months)

*She is a virgin, I am not.  She is saving herself for marriage and even before my marriage (I was married for almost a year) I wasn't a virgin.

*She lives 2 hours east of me.  I live two hours west of her.

*And the worst part.  She is a fan of the Jets, the Braves, and Ole Miss.  I like better teams: Saints, Mets (ok, so they may not be better), and Southern Miss.

Out of all of this, I wake up every morning constantly surprised that she is dating me.  She is a soft skinned angel who has never done drugs, never had sex, and never been drunk.  I am a heavily tattooed former pothead who has slept with more people than she has kissed and spent a few years of my life shooting terrorists in the face for a living.  I have never dated anyone who without trying, or even saying a word, has made me feel so guilty or shameful about who I was before I met them.  I have also never dated someone who I felt as comfortable holding in my arms as her.

I don't know that there is much of a question here.  I tend to just use this site as a place to vent my insecurities or problems.  But I'll ask a question anyways.  Are there any other guys out there who have had successful relationships with women who were much less sinful (Or maybe more sheltered/better people/whatever she is in comparison to me)?  Are there tattooed, former potheads or killers (lawful or otherwise) out there who have good relationships with great southern baptist women of faith?

Colts!!!! Long live Peyton Manning!!!

[Carwhisperer]

In 1993 when I was 29 I married a 21 year old girl like that. My background with other women was similar to yours but I had never been married. She out classed me as a Christian and general goodness as a human being. I didn't change much over the years and in March 2009 I began divorce proceedings as an act of mercy toward her because she wouldn't do it and I couldn't bear to see her suffer because of me any more. I've been working on reconciliation for a while and she is considering it. We've got a 13 year old daughter who is suffering immensely because of what I've done. It sounds like you are worried about doing something similar to one of God's precious creatures. I'm not sure what the answer is but if you are pretty sure you are not good enough for her then maybe you should break up. By the way, thanks for serving our country

[Nathanael]

Its about who you are and who you will be for her, not so much about who you were. Devote yourself to her, put her before yourself, be a listener and doer of what makes her feel valued and loved, NEVER let her down, especially in the area of other women, and there is no reason that you both can't be very happy. The past is kept where it belongs by guarding against the actions and attitudes you had back then, if they are kicked into touch then the past really is the past.