Help

[Joe23]

Ok, I need some help heres my story, I was raised in a christian home and always considered myself to be a christian, but I had addictions to pornography (along with other sexual sins) for about 8 years sometime in October of 2012
I prayed to God and was changed latterly over night its been about a year but earlier this month I went back to my old habits of sexual immorality and I like it....
I know it is wrong but I am unwilling to give it up I pray to God for forgiveness but am not truly sorry just feels like Im saying a bunch of empty meaningless words...
I don't even feel conviction for the sin(s) half the time...

I NEED HELP!!
HAVE I LOST MY SALVATION?
AM I TO LOST TO BE SAVED?
WHY IS THERE NO CONVICTION?
WHY CAN'T I REPENT?

If anyone is/has going/gone through this please let me know how you handle/handled it and let me know how to get back to God...
and please pray for me, thank you

One more thing I found a web filter application for Mac (the os I use) that I hade installed on my computer a day to so ago but I of course know the password and email (for password recovery) and just bypass it, I was wondering if I could use one of your (anyone) email and have you make a password (so I will not know it) I've set it up they way I want it (please don't change the settings) but please allow me to use one of your email accounts (there is no fee btw it's a free application) thank you

[DaveW]

Welcome to the forums!

First off - you need to find someone to be accountable IN THE FLESH and not just over the web. I have heard from people who have set up those cyber blockers that they ALWAYS find some way around them.

I will not give you ideas by listing their methods.

I NEED HELP!!

Yes you do.  From a guy at your congregation who can walk you thru this.

HAVE I LOST MY SALVATION?
AM I TO LOST TO BE SAVED?

No. As long as you are still concerned about it you have not.

WHY IS THERE NO CONVICTION?

There is but perhaps you have become calloused to it.

WHY CAN'T I REPENT?

There are many reasons you may feel unable to repent.

First off - what does "repent" look like to you?  You may have the wrong idea of it.
Second - it is a journey.  You have been going a certain way for a while and it may take time to truly find your way back.
Thirdly - do not give in to discouragement.  That is not the conviction of the Holy Spirit which leads to walking free from sins; it is the condemnation of the devil who does not want you to succeed in coming back.

[Joe23]

There are many reasons you may feel unable to repent.

First off - what does "repent" look like to you?  You may have the wrong idea of it.
Second - it is a journey.  You have been going a certain way for a while and it may take time to truly find your way back.
Thirdly - do not give in to discouragement.  That is not the conviction of the Holy Spirit which leads to walking free from sins; it is the condemnation of the devil who does not want you to succeed in coming back.

I guess I just do not feel genuinely sorry for committing the sin(s)

[DaveW]

I guess I just do not feel genuinely sorry for committing the sin(s)

Repentance is not a feeling, it is a decision. 

The Hebrew word for repentance - teshuvah (root = shub) means to turn around and walk back the way you came.  The Greek (NT) word is metanoin which means to change your mind.  Feeling sorry or having remorse is what Judas experienced after betraying our Lord to the authorities.  It was NOT true repentance. So if you are looking at repentance from an "I feel sorry" viewpoint, you are looking at the wrong thing.

Repentance is understanding something is wrong, and start taking steps to get away from it.

[Joe23]

Maybe I'm just confused but I just don't think I have a love for God, I seem to only care about myself and "I don't want to go to hell" but don't really seem to care for God, Jesus or his death on the cross
How can I shift my view back to Jesus and get true love for God ?

[JohnDB70X7]

To the O.P. you look pretty shaken up to me.

Why do you suppose that is?

I mean if you had lost your salvation, why would it upset you? If you have returned to all out sin, I mean...

The fact that it does bother you is a good sign.

[JohnDB70X7]

What needs to be taught more often in the Body of Christ is that we are new creations in Christ and that the old has been done away with does not mean we will no longer have to contend with sin or temptation. The newness is the Covenant of grace. Our new nature is that of Christ but only in spirit. And we still have the choice to follow the spirit (good) or the flesh (bad).

This is not a license to sin. And never forget God is watching and working in and through us so he will bring about consequences in this life for our sin. It stands to reason if you cut off your finger you will only have 9 fingers the rest of your life. But your salvation is not lost.

1 John 2:1 (KJV)
1 My little children, these things write I unto you, that ye sin not. And if any man sin, we have an advocate with the Father, Jesus Christ the righteous:

1 John 1:5-10 (KJV)
5 This then is the message which we have heard of him, and declare unto you, that God is light, and in him is no darkness at all.
6 If we say that we have fellowship with him, and walk in darkness, we lie, and do not the truth:
7 But if we walk in the light, as he is in the light, we have fellowship one with another, and the blood of Jesus Christ his Son cleanseth us from all sin.
8 If we say that we have no sin, we deceive ourselves, and the truth is not in us.
9 If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just to forgive us our sins, and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness.
10 If we say that we have not sinned, we make him a liar, and his word is not in us.

Romans 6 (KJV)
1 What shall we say then? Shall we continue in sin, that grace may abound?
2 God forbid. How shall we, that are dead to sin, live any longer therein?
3 Know ye not, that so many of us as were baptized into Jesus Christ were baptized into his death?
4 Therefore we are buried with him by baptism into death: that like as Christ was raised up from the dead by the glory of the Father, even so we also should walk in newness of life.
5 For if we have been planted together in the likeness of his death, we shall be also in the likeness of his resurrection:
6 Knowing this, that our old man is crucified with him, that the body of sin might be destroyed, that henceforth we should not serve sin.
7 For he that is dead is freed from sin.
8 Now if we be dead with Christ, we believe that we shall also live with him:
9 Knowing that Christ being raised from the dead dieth no more; death hath no more dominion over him.
10 For in that he died, he died unto sin once: but in that he liveth, he liveth unto God.
11 Likewise reckon ye also yourselves to be dead indeed unto sin, but alive unto God through Jesus Christ our Lord.
12 Let not sin therefore reign in your mortal body, that ye should obey it in the lusts thereof.
13 Neither yield ye your members as instruments of unrighteousness unto sin: but yield yourselves unto God, as those that are alive from the dead, and your members as instruments of righteousness unto God.
14 For sin shall not have dominion over you: for ye are not under the law, but under grace.
15 What then? shall we sin, because we are not under the law, but under grace? God forbid.
16 Know ye not, that to whom ye yield yourselves servants to obey, his servants ye are to whom ye obey; whether of sin unto death, or of obedience unto righteousness?
17 But God be thanked, that ye were the servants of sin, but ye have obeyed from the heart that form of doctrine which was delivered you.
18 Being then made free from sin, ye became the servants of righteousness.
19 I speak after the manner of men because of the infirmity of your flesh: for as ye have yielded your members servants to uncleanness and to iniquity unto iniquity; even so now yield your members servants to righteousness unto holiness.
20 For when ye were the servants of sin, ye were free from righteousness.
21 What fruit had ye then in those things whereof ye are now ashamed? for the end of those things is death.
22 But now being made free from sin, and become servants to God, ye have your fruit unto holiness, and the end everlasting life.
23 For the wages of sin is death; but the gift of God is eternal life through Jesus Christ our Lord.

Romans 7 (KJV)
1 Know ye not, brethren, (for I speak to them that know the law,) how that the law hath dominion over a man as long as he liveth?
2 For the woman which hath an husband is bound by the law to her husband so long as he liveth; but if the husband be dead, she is loosed from the law of her husband.
3 So then if, while her husband liveth, she be married to another man, she shall be called an adulteress: but if her husband be dead, she is free from that law; so that she is no adulteress, though she be married to another man.
4 Wherefore, my brethren, ye also are become dead to the law by the body of Christ; that ye should be married to another, even to him who is raised from the dead, that we should bring forth fruit unto God.
5 For when we were in the flesh, the motions of sins, which were by the law, did work in our members to bring forth fruit unto death.
6 But now we are delivered from the law, that being dead wherein we were held; that we should serve in newness of spirit, and not in the oldness of the letter.
7 What shall we say then? Is the law sin? God forbid. Nay, I had not known sin, but by the law: for I had not known lust, except the law had said, Thou shalt not covet.
8 But sin, taking occasion by the commandment, wrought in me all manner of concupiscence. For without the law sin was dead.
9 For I was alive without the law once: but when the commandment came, sin revived, and I died.
10 And the commandment, which was ordained to life, I found to be unto death.
11 For sin, taking occasion by the commandment, deceived me, and by it slew me.
12 Wherefore the law is holy, and the commandment holy, and just, and good.
13 Was then that which is good made death unto me? God forbid. But sin, that it might appear sin, working death in me by that which is good; that sin by the commandment might become exceeding sinful.
14 For we know that the law is spiritual: but I am carnal, sold under sin.
15 For that which I do I allow not: for what I would, that do I not; but what I hate, that do I.
16 If then I do that which I would not, I consent unto the law that it is good.
17 Now then it is no more I that do it, but sin that dwelleth in me.
18 For I know that in me (that is, in my flesh,) dwelleth no good thing: for to will is present with me; but how to perform that which is good I find not.
19 For the good that I would I do not: but the evil which I would not, that I do.
20 Now if I do that I would not, it is no more I that do it, but sin that dwelleth in me.
21 I find then a law, that, when I would do good, evil is present with me.
22 For I delight in the law of God after the inward man:
23 But I see another law in my members, warring against the law of my mind, and bringing me into captivity to the law of sin which is in my members.
24 O wretched man that I am! who shall deliver me from the body of this death?
25 I thank God through Jesus Christ our Lord. So then with the mind I myself serve the law of God; but with the flesh the law of sin.

Romans 8 (KJV)
1 There is therefore now no condemnation to them which are in Christ Jesus, who walk not after the flesh, but after the Spirit.
2 For the law of the Spirit of life in Christ Jesus hath made me free from the law of sin and death.
3 For what the law could not do, in that it was weak through the flesh, God sending his own Son in the likeness of sinful flesh, and for sin, condemned sin in the flesh:
4 That the righteousness of the law might be fulfilled in us, who walk not after the flesh, but after the Spirit.
5 For they that are after the flesh do mind the things of the flesh; but they that are after the Spirit the things of the Spirit.
6 For to be carnally minded is death; but to be spiritually minded is life and peace.
7 Because the carnal mind is enmity against God: for it is not subject to the law of God, neither indeed can be.
8 So then they that are in the flesh cannot please God.
9 But ye are not in the flesh, but in the Spirit, if so be that the Spirit of God dwell in you. Now if any man have not the Spirit of Christ, he is none of his.
10 And if Christ be in you, the body is dead because of sin; but the Spirit is life because of righteousness.
11 But if the Spirit of him that raised up Jesus from the dead dwell in you, he that raised up Christ from the dead shall also quicken your mortal bodies by his Spirit that dwelleth in you.
12 Therefore, brethren, we are debtors, not to the flesh, to live after the flesh.
13 For if ye live after the flesh, ye shall die: but if ye through the Spirit do mortify the deeds of the body, ye shall live.
14 For as many as are led by the Spirit of God, they are the sons of God.
15 For ye have not received the spirit of bondage again to fear; but ye have received the Spirit of adoption, whereby we cry, Abba, Father.
16 The Spirit itself beareth witness with our spirit, that we are the children of God:
17 And if children, then heirs; heirs of God, and joint-heirs with Christ; if so be that we suffer with him, that we may be also glorified together.
18 For I reckon that the sufferings of this present time are not worthy to be compared with the glory which shall be revealed in us.
19 For the earnest expectation of the creature waiteth for the manifestation of the sons of God.
20 For the creature was made subject to vanity, not willingly, but by reason of him who hath subjected the same in hope,
21 Because the creature itself also shall be delivered from the bondage of corruption into the glorious liberty of the children of God.
22 For we know that the whole creation groaneth and travaileth in pain together until now.
23 And not only they, but ourselves also, which have the firstfruits of the Spirit, even we ourselves groan within ourselves, waiting for the adoption, to wit, the redemption of our body.
24 For we are saved by hope: but hope that is seen is not hope: for what a man seeth, why doth he yet hope for?
25 But if we hope for that we see not, then do we with patience wait for it.
26 Likewise the Spirit also helpeth our infirmities: for we know not what we should pray for as we ought: but the Spirit itself maketh intercession for us with groanings which cannot be uttered.
27 And he that searcheth the hearts knoweth what is the mind of the Spirit, because he maketh intercession for the saints according to the will of God.
28 And we know that all things work together for good to them that love God, to them who are the called according to his purpose.
29 For whom he did foreknow, he also did predestinate to be conformed to the image of his Son, that he might be the firstborn among many brethren.
30 Moreover whom he did predestinate, them he also called: and whom he called, them he also justified: and whom he justified, them he also glorified.
31 What shall we then say to these things? If God be for us, who can be against us?
32 He that spared not his own Son, but delivered him up for us all, how shall he not with him also freely give us all things?
33 Who shall lay any thing to the charge of God's elect? It is God that justifieth.
34 Who is he that condemneth? It is Christ that died, yea rather, that is risen again, who is even at the right hand of God, who also maketh intercession for us.
35 Who shall separate us from the love of Christ? shall tribulation, or distress, or persecution, or famine, or nakedness, or peril, or sword?
36 As it is written, For thy sake we are killed all the day long; we are accounted as sheep for the slaughter.
37 Nay, in all these things we are more than conquerors through him that loved us.
38 For I am persuaded, that neither death, nor life, nor angels, nor principalities, nor powers, nor things present, nor things to come,
39 Nor height, nor depth, nor any other creature, shall be able to separate us from the love of God, which is in Christ Jesus our Lord.

[Joe23]

Yea, I just think I was confused and doubtful of Gods grace... I listened to a sermon on surmonaudio.com and it seemed to help (with the salvation part) it talked about returning to old sins is like being callused you don't feel the spiritual pain as much as the first time you committed the sin, just like having callused hands lessens the pain of doing various task... and I asked God for help on the addiction part and Im on the internet (now and yesterday) and haven't had any temptation to strong to overcome (with God's hep of course) Hopefully it stays that way

and this helped to
Romans 5:20: Moreover the law entered, that the offense might abound. But where sin abounded, grace did much more abound

[DaveW]

This is a good sign Joe.

Keep with it!   


The senior pastor of the church I attended in college (in Michigan) said this in one of his sermons: (we had just had a HUGE snow storm)

Sin is a lot like snow. You can spend hours clearing it off your car, digging out the driveway.   But if you just stay there, in a short time you will be buried in it again.

BUT - if you get in and drive south toward the sun [SON], by the time you get to Tennessee or Alabama; where is the snow?  And how much work did you do in clearing it off?

The point was if you keep yourself busy doing the Lord's work following Him, the sins start dropping off.  The closer we get to Him, the less sin will have hold on us.