Time Of the Month(female)

[dallasapple]

If this is too graphic mods please instruct me...

But...I have noticed my spouse (Banana) treats me different when its my time every month..Not just in an intimate  way sexually but all ways...all together less interest..Even though he is NOT an Old Testiment guy LOL!...Its my rule...Nothings going to be going on then...So he pulls away from me in all ways...Does that mean he only cares about talking to me...spending time with me if there is the possiblity /hope of  sexual intimacy?(my answer is no and he knows it during this time)

I have tested it too...I will hide the fact its my time and he is the same very there and "available"..I tell him its my time when its not and he goes distant...

Its extremely hurtful....It makes me feel as if I am only of interest if intamcy is a possiblility in a sexual way..

Im tired of it and Im mad!LOL!

Blessings

Dallas

[4Christ]

Dallas, hi there sister,   

Well I got a few thoughts going here about this situation:

1)  Banana is being a typical Neantherthal and doesn't even realize he is treating you this way monthly.
2)  He is aware of what he is doing but it's because this "curse" of the month is kinda of "girly","icky", "messy" and "nasty" and he's real real thankful each month that he's not a girl
3)  He is purposely stand-offish because a barracuda comes out each month to bite his head off if he comes near

All of these are possibilities.  Do you think any "fit"? 

[seeking_him]

PMS: Permenant Man Syndrome.

Have you talked to him about this? That might be the first step you want to take. Is he even aware that he does this?

[mandalee65]

I don't know either of us, so this is total speculation...

perhaps if he knows you've made the rule that no intercourse takes place during that period, then he's actually respecting your lines. It could be that he can't cuddle with you without wanting sex, and that to avoid the desire (and the subsequent rejection/"wait-till-later"), it's easier for him to avoid cuddling altogether.

Did that make any sense?

[dallasapple]

Yall are hilarious!!!

Mandalee I think your on to something...Maybe he is just trying to respect my space at this time.Like I said he is not "grossed out" by it becuase he has told me it doesnt inhibit him not one bit.But he knows there is notta chance so it may frustrate him to get really close...


And Seeking_ Him I have asked him and he denys that he acts different and he swears that he is not "paying attention" that its even my time..Like he doenst have a thought at all either either way.....

Im sorry I dont believe him! LOL!! Because I can just about gurantee on the 5th day or there abouts he will get all cozy with me again...So if hes not "thinking" about it at all how then does he know when Im nearing the end..

He also empties the trash can in the bathroom on about the 4th day..I swear I think he is looking to see "evidence" of a slowdown in the need for female products.....No more wrappers....No more curse..

See how suspicious I am....

Blessings

Dallas

[mandalee65]

For heaven's sake, girl, if he empties the trash can without being asked, that's every bit as good as a cuddle in my book! 

[dallasapple]

For heaven's sake, girl, if he empties the trash can without being asked, that's every bit as good as a cuddle in my book! 

My Banana is very "domesticated" he cooks dinner and does all the laundry too...

BUT the only time that trash can gets emptied is on the 4th or 5th day of my monthly...

And the funny funny in an odd way thing is Im not even the cuddling type in the first place.HE IS!!!..So its not that I really feel "unloved" its just it makes me wonder if the ONLY reason he cuddles with me  ever IS for the hope of sex...(suspicious minds Im tellin ya!)

Blessings

Dallas

[janine]

Could be he thinks of it as his own little vacation from having to "perform".  And other stuff is there to do with all his free time. :D

I have a friend with a large family -- between the kids and the older children's kids, I think some days when the grandbabies visit there are like 15 children running around.

I bring that up to say this -- On a day when she would be "unavaliable", a heavy-flow day or a super-tired day, you know -- she turns a cute little stuffed animal on her dresser face-to-the-wall.

They don't even have to discuss it.  When hubby comes home from work and sees the beaver's hiding her face, no nookie.

This plan hasn't inhibited them very much -- I mean, look at all the kids!

[dallasapple]

Could be he thinks of it as his own little vacation from having to "perform".  And other stuff is there to do with all his free time. :D
   

LOL!!  I doubt that if by performing you mean having to have sex..He's a once a day kind of guy and has been for his entire life...

I think its either subconcious like 4Christ said or he is just respecting my "time" like Mandalee65 said...I just find it rather curious you might say....

Blessings

Dallas

[janine]

Hubby reminded me of some study he read about somewhere, years ago.

There was a test of a birth control pill, some island community used it for a while.  I don't think the study was for the drug, itself, rather I think it had to do with studying ovulation or something else in our "cycles".  What was done was to synchronize the women's schedules.

It got to where just about every female between 12 and 50 was having her period at the same time.

It got to where just about every male able to get away for a week-long fishing trip started doing it that same week.

Hubby's male POV sez, there's substance to the idea that it's good to avoid getting your head bitten off.

[dallasapple]

Hubby reminded me of some study he read about somewhere, years ago.

There was a test of a birth control pill, some island community used it for a while.  I don't think the study was for the drug, itself, rather I think it had to do with studying ovulation or something else in our "cycles".  What was done was to synchronize the women's schedules.

It got to where just about every female between 12 and 50 was having her period at the same time.

It got to where just about every male able to get away for a week-long fishing trip started doing it that same week.

Hubby's male POV sez, there's substance to the idea that it's good to avoid getting your head bitten off.

For sure...the funny thing is I am not unpleasant during my period...In fact my mood is pretty good..Its the week leading UP to my period that its a possibility I might "bite"......LOL!!!

Anyway...Its all good... 

Oh and by the way...I heard the phenomnen of women in a group livign in close quarters all eventually havign their cycles in snych is evidence of human pheremomes... 

Blessings

Dallas

[Jaime]

Is THIS that time of month?         

[dallasapple]

Is THIS that time of month?         

TEE HEE!!!!!

NOT!!!


You are funnyyyy!!!!


Blessings

Dallas

[Jaime]

Well, you know us guys are!  

[dallasapple]

Well, you know us guys are!  

Oh shute!!! We are??? What  is that anyway?.. A goose... Or some kind of bird??? 

Blessings

Dallas

[Jaime]

Well, you know us guys are!  

Oh shute!!! We are??? What  is that anyway?.. A goose... Or some kind of bird??? 

Blessings

Dallas

I meant to illustrate that guys are CHICKENS, especially during THIS time of month.

(Me peeking over a pile of rocks)

[dallasapple]

Well, you know us guys are!  

Oh shute!!! We are??? What  is that anyway?.. A goose... Or some kind of bird??? 

Blessings

Dallas

I meant to illustrate that guys are CHICKENS, especially during THIS time of month.

(Me peeking over a pile of rocks)

Bwak...Bwak....(scratch...scratch..) BwaK!!!!.. (so goes the men and WE are supposed to be hens? ::)

Blessings

Dallas

[Jaime]

I was kinda hoping for a cat fight 

[dallasapple]

I was kinda hoping for a cat fight 

Well your not gonna get one...I was insulted today by people...I reserve my claws for when it something important..

And I would like to tell ya'll...Thanks for the warm welcome.....

See ya...I pray ya'll have fun and get joy and hope from one another...

Love Ya

Blessings

Dallas

[Jaime]

Adios! 

[Bon Voyage]

You females can have your time of the month, I don't wan't it.

[msbradley]

You females can have your time of the month, I don't want it.

And you think WE WANT IT???

I'm looking forward to menopause!!

My daughter and I were close and experienced the sync-ing. After she moved away from home, and she'd tell me it was her time, I'd teasingly tell her to stay away.

A few weeks ago, she went to the doctor with me. When my doctor asked when was my last cycle, I told him I thought it was in December or January. Then my daughter told my doctor and me that I had it at the same time she did in March.
I hate cycles!!

I was whining to my daughter Monday night that it's my time. She said "Well, at least you're not pregnant!" Yeah, since I have had 5 grandkids since I've had sex!!

[Jaime]

msbradley,

My wife had to have a hysterectomy about 3 years ago, and she was looking forward to not having to deal with her cycles. Instead she has been be-deviled with the homone chaos including sleepless nights and hot flashes, plus mysterious and unexplained aches and pains. I feel so sorry for her. You might want to re-evaluate that menopause thing. From my vantage point, it seems like continual every day misery in lieu of ever 30 28 days.

[Jaime]

Jaime,
Sounds like your wife needs hormone replacement therapy (HRT).  No need for all that misery.  Tell her to look for a doctor or nurse practitioner who will take her symptoms seriously.  While it is true that there are small risks associated with taking estrogen, as there are risks with any medication, many women find that the benefits greatly outweigh the risks.  Your wife needs a a health care professional who will look at her family and individual medical history and give her adivce and therapy for her problems.  (If she's already on HRT she obviously needs a different dosage than she is taking.)

Connie,

Thanks for the advice. I know she is taking something, but I'm not sure what. She has had and still has Fibromyalgia, so I don't know which malady is in control. All I know is, screwed up hormones and Fibro are a miserable combination, and I don't understand either. Hopefully we will get her feeling better before too long.

Sorry girls for interrupting your thread. It's hard for me to resist interjecting some humor sometimes.

Blessings,
Jaime

[mandalee65]

Though I will never understand why women living together hit cycles at the same time, it is oh-so-true. In college, my suitemates and I were always on the same schedule. Talk about scary! LOL

[Jaime]

Jaime,
Sounds like your wife needs hormone replacement therapy (HRT).  No need for all that misery.  Tell her to look for a doctor or nurse practitioner who will take her symptoms seriously.  While it is true that there are small risks associated with taking estrogen, as there are risks with any medication, many women find that the benefits greatly outweigh the risks.  Your wife needs a a health care professional who will look at her family and individual medical history and give her adivce and therapy for her problems.  (If she's already on HRT she obviously needs a different dosage than she is taking.)

Connie,

Thanks for the advice. I know she is taking something, but I'm not sure what. She has had and still has Fibromyalgia, so I don't know which malady is in control. All I know is, screwed up hormones and Fibro are a miserable combination, and I don't understand either. Hopefully we will get her feeling better before too long.

Sorry girls for interrupting your thread. It's hard for me to resist interjecting some humor sometimes.

Blessings,
Jaime

Sounds like your wife has a very supportive and kind husband, Jaime, and that means a lot.  Praying that she will be feeling well again very soon. 

Yeah, he's one of a kind! 

[Bon Voyage]

There could be a singing competition for women during "That time of month."  It could be called "American Midol."

[DCR]

There could be a singing competition for women during "That time of month."  It could be called "American Midol."

 

[Arkstfan]

Some thoughts after reading the thread.

Anything that impacts marital harmony is a concern. A husband and/or wife who disconnects from the relationship one-fourth of the year is an invitation to trouble. If it were 12 weeks in a row we'd all be up in arms. It is the sort of thing that can lead to really big problems.

Dallas, you are placing your own interpretation on your husband's actions because you think it means he is only interested in you if there is a chance of having some fun that night. While that is not an implausible possibility my opinion is that it is the real reason is less nefarious.

The uuuuhhhhhh factor.

This weird thing is happening to my wife, she was snappish last week and now this is going on, I'll give her some space (or give myself some space).

You've likely added to that by setting the hard fast "nothings going to happen" rule. If you know you are going to be electrocuted if you touch the handrail in the stairway on Mondays odds are pretty good you won't walk close to the handrail on Mondays either.

You two probably need to revisit this issue either because of his uuuuhhhh factor or because of your wall of death barrier you've erected for one-fourth of the year, or because of both.

[kensington]

Now this thread made me laugh... 

To be honest, all of my trash cans get emptied more often than 5 days, they are checked daily.

So... if your husband is anything like mine... if he checked one and emptied it on the 5th day with this kind of waste... it would be due to the fact that he thought I had lost my mind and it NEEDED it!

He would say... "EEEWWWW!" But he would empty it. 

[admin]

1)  Banana is being a typical Neantherthal

Rude, insulting and offensive. How about I use a stereotypical phrase for women and put "typical" in front of it. Is it funny then?!

You don't know the situation and you certainly had no right to insult all men.

[ConnieLard]

I agree with admin.  It's not really fair to use terms like that.  (But, if you call people on this kind of behavior you end up being labelled as unloving. )

[Bon Voyage]

1)  Banana is being a typical Neantherthal

Rude, insulting and offensive. How about I use a stereotypical phrase for women and put "typical" in front of it. Is it funny then?!

You don't know the situation and you certainly had no right to insult all men.

You are a white male.  It is ok to bash you.

[ConnieLard]

Sad, but true.  Sorry, guys.  Not everybody feels that way.

[janine]

I think you people are being insulting to Neanderthals.  Call Geico and apologize right now!