Marriage, Divorce, and Remarriage

[janine]

Even though I get irritated with some Orthodoxen in my online conversations with them -- I do like a lot of their church's views re: marriage, subsequent marriages, etc.

One thing I found interesting when one couple was describing how things were handled when they married -- She had been married before, at least, don't recall about him --

They entered almost a process of penitence and mourning, re: the failure(s) of the first marriage(s) that had ended -- regardless of who was at fault -- and after a time of discussion and study and careful consideration, they married.

[Sherman Nobles]

I've often wondered how helpful it would be for the church to develop some ceremony that might help divorce'es bury their dead marriage?  I read a book on "The Get" concerning the Jewish tradition of rabbis being involved in the process of a man giving his wife a bill of divorce.  Of course, they do no recognize civil authority's place in divorce (which I disagree with), but the ceremony itself seems to help provide an end to the relationship.  Of course, we want to help people make a go of their marriage.  But if the couple decides to divorce, should we also not help them pick up the pieces of their lives and move on?  I'm just pondering.

[Gracious]

Luke 16.18  Divorce in the Context of the Parental Love of God

In Chapter 16, Luke briefly mentions Jesus' words concerning "putting away.

[Howie26]

Shermon,

Another question.  What is your understanding of I Corinthians 7:11 where the wife who is separated from her husband is to remain unmarried or be reconciled to her husband?  Is this a command for a single life if she is not reconciled?

[Sherman Nobles]

Gracious thanks, and Howie, I believe the 1 Cor. 7.11 was briefly covered in one of the first posts.  Note two different words in the quote of Jesus concerning what a man does (divorce) and what is done to the woman (separation).  I believe Jesus was dealing with two different problems, both of them predominantly caused by men for they had the power socially and religiously.  In the case where the woman was to stay single, it was because her husband had expelled or abandoned her but had not given her a bill of divorce.  Thus she was still legally married because only the man, in Jewish culture, had the power of divorce.   Note that the man was given no such instruction, why? 1. Because he could legally divorce his wife. And 2. because polygamy was still practised, legal, socially acceptable, and even religiously acceptable.  I have a few posts on 1 Cor. 7 that are coming up soon. 

[Sherman Nobles]

Now we come to a very interesting passage, another foundational passage for a biblical understanding of marriage, 1 Cor. 7.  It is a fascinating scripture, sadly often misunderstood and misinterpreted.  Again, context is important to understand what Paul says concerning MDR.  In this case, the literary context is very important.  Apparently, Paul wrote this letter to the Corinthian church in response to a letter with concerns and questions that the Corinthian church was struggling with.  1 Cor.7.1 introduces such a question.

"Now I will answer the questions that you asked in your letter.  You asked, 'Is it best for people not to marry?'

[Sherman Nobles]

Apparently, some in Corinth were even divorcing their spouses in order to avoid sexual intimacy and devote themselves wholly to the Lord, and thus, Paul quotes Jesus general directives for men not to divorce their wives and for wives not to leave their husbands. 

1 Cor. 7.11-12 says,  "Now to the married I command, yet not I but the Lord: 'A wife is not to depart (chorizo) from her husband.  But even if she does depart(chorizo), let her remain unmarried (agamos) or be reconciled to her husband.  And a husband is not to divorce (apheimi) his wife.'

[Sherman Nobles]

"But if the unbeliever departs (chorizo), let him depart (chorizo); a brother or a sister is not under bondage (douloo) in such cases.

[Sherman Nobles]

Well, I've saved the best for last.  Let's look at vs. 27 & 28. 

"Are you bound to a wife?  Do not seek to be loosed.  Are you loosed from a wife?  Do not seek a wife.  But even if you do marry, you have not sinned;  and if a virgin marries, she has not sinned.  Nevertheless such will have trouble in the flesh, but I would spare you.

[Sherman Nobles]

"A wife is bound by law as long as her husband lives; but if her husband dies, she is at liberty to be married to whom she wishes, only in the Lord.

[Sherman Nobles]

So what did Paul mean by "bound by law

[Sherman Nobles]

Bound by Law (3 of 3)

Could it be that Paul did not mean, "law,

[Sherman Nobles]

This keeps coming up on other threads so I thought to simply post and move it forward in the list in case anyone wants to read it or respond to it.

[MarkHooper]

God divorced Israel. Jer 3:8

[Sherman Nobles]

Jer.3.8 is actually the verse that I base the title of my book on -- "God Is A Divorce' Too! A Message of Hope, Healing, and Forgiveness". 

[Johnb]

Sherman
I watch for your posts to help me keep my sanity.  They are always well thought out and obviously much study goes into them.  I am wondering what sin we have committed to attract all the wacky, "true gospel", "2 gospel" know it all, let me tell you horrible sinners how you should believe and act folks. 

It is heart wrenching to know how many folks are taught that they must stay in a marriage or live alone even if there is abuse and no love.  Thanks for the sunshine in you posts.  Later Johnb   

[Sherman Nobles]

Thanks John, I appreciate the encouragement.  I too appreciate your heart and passion for the Lord.

Blessings,
Sherman

[MarkHooper]

 

Jer.3.8 is actually the verse that I base the title of my book on -- "God Is A Divorce' Too! A Message of Hope, Healing, and Forgiveness".  

It does kind of put a weird spin on the whole MDR thing. It also creates a paradox in which we have to get to the Spirit of the matter rather than the letter of the Law.

Interesting enough I thought there was a scripture that says God hates divorce.

[Sherman Nobles]

Jer.3.8 is actually the verse that I base the title of my book on -- "God Is A Divorce' Too! A Message of Hope, Healing, and Forgiveness".  

It does kind of put a weird spin on the whole MDR thing. It also creates a paradox in which we have to get to the Spirit of the matter rather than the letter of the Law.

Interesting enough I thought there was a scripture that says God hates divorce.

Mal.2.16 is typically errantly translated that "God hated divorce."  Sadly, few translators know that they are trying to translate an idiomatic phrase in this passage.  In Israel there were two types of divorce, those based on morally acceptable reasons and morally non-acceptable reasons.  Divorces based on selfish morally non-acceptable reasons were called "hateful divorces".  Mal.2.16 is rebuking those who perform the "hateful divorce."

[MarkHooper]

excellent point! I like it when I learn something. Thanks

[Sherman Nobles]

Yes, I enjoy learning too.  I love to study the Word.  I especially love to study with those who know more than I do, and of those many I especially enjoy studying with those who understand the Word differently than I do.  It really helps to broaden my very limited perspective.

[dmcca]

Mr. Nobles--I plan to copy out your lessons and take notes. i am really committed to this study. I've read homer hailey and Samuel Dawson--two devout scholars of God's word. both vilified because of their stand on mdr. Just thinking about the early Lord's Church as well as present day America. Did Jesus really want the dissolvement of marriages before people could enter his kingdom? What consternation, what heart-break, what untold poverty this would have caused the early church. Some churches won't baptise a person until they have started divorce proceedings against an innocent spouse. I can't stand it. By the way, I read your article on the web about God being a divorcee.

[Sherman Nobles]

dmcca,

Thanks for your encouraging post.  I pray and trust that the material will be a blessing to you.  Sadly, due to the rampant anti-Semetism in the early Gentile branch of the church, it did not study the words of Jesus through the cultural lens of first century Jews. Instead they viewed it through the lens of Platonic thought.  Even today, Western thought is based a lot upon Plato.  When reading the Gospels, we make many errant assumptions unknowingly, and it takes significant study of the Jewish culture to uncover these errant assumptions.  Anyhow, I look forward to any questions or comments you may have as you go through my posts. 

What I uncovered in my studies was so radically different than anything that I had seen peaced together elsewhere, that before I sought a publisher for my manuscript, I had pastors and theologians from a wide range of denominations review it for me.  I'm thankful to say that almost all endorsed it, and the two that did not endorse it, did so because of pesonal reasons, not because they found anything they disagreed with.  Three of the ones who endorsed my book are professors at Regent University.   Anyhow, I was greatly honored and humbled by their endorsement.  I hope you too find the information helpful and inspirational.

Blessings,
Sherman

[Hehealedme]

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[Hehealedme]

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[Sherman Nobles]

Warning: this topic has not been posted in for at least 120 days.
Unless you're sure you want to reply, please consider starting a new topic.

This is the first time that I see such a 'warning' on any message boards that I have been on in the past...
However, I believe that this thread should be bumped back up to page 1 so that others may be able to read/consult/or maybe even reply to it eventhough it has been a while since no-one has posted in it for the past almost nine months now...
Personally, I wish I could have known about this particular thread two years ago, but I wasn't a member of this board yet back then...

Sherman, I wish to thank you for writing this book, but especially for sharing some of it on this board...I have read the first page so far...it took me a while for I am a slow reader...I will definitely read the rest of it...and again, I thank you...

Thanks Hehealedme.  I appreciate the encouragement.  My book, "God is a Divorce' Too!" is not a light devotional read; it's a systematic theology of MDR, though I tried to add some related inspirational material in it also.  I welcome any questions or comments you might have on my book or the issue.

Blessings,
Sherman

[Corbley]

I believe in the "plain" text in the bible concerning marrage and divorce.

The problem with so much acceptance to divorce in this day and age is; Social Acceptance of divorce.  Since society, accepts divorce, Christians tend to fall into the trap of what is right by God and what is acceptable in society.

Similar, today, homosexuals get offended, when Christians quote from the Bible and say that being Gay is a sin and damnation follows the unrepentant heart. So, they argue back and condem Christians for saying they are going to hell.

Likewise, since divorce is becoming a social norm, people are trying to justify their reasons for divorce. When in doubt, go to what the word of God says about it....then do not add anything to the Bible to suit your needs...And there is your answer.

[Bonnie]

I believe in the "plain" text in the bible concerning marrage and divorce.

The problem with so much acceptance to divorce in this day and age is; Social Acceptance of divorce.  Since society, accepts divorce, Christians tend to fall into the trap of what is right by God and what is acceptable in society.

Similar, today, homosexuals get offended, when Christians quote from the Bible and say that being Gay is a sin and damnation follows the unrepentant heart. So, they argue back and condem Christians for saying they are going to hell.

Likewise, since divorce is becoming a social norm, people are trying to justify their reasons for divorce. When in doubt, go to what the word of God says about it....then do not add anything to the Bible to suit your needs...And there is your answer.

When it comes down to it that is exactly the answer.
Amen

[Reformer]

I believe in the "plain" text in the bible concerning marrage and divorce...

Likewise, since divorce is becoming a social norm, people are trying to justify their reasons for divorce. When in doubt, go to what the word of God says about it....then do not add anything to the Bible to suit your needs...And there is your answer.

      The partisan, traditional view on divorce and remarriage is that God approves of them in two cases only: 1) Adultery; and 2) If an unbeliever deserts his/her believing spouse (Matt. 19:9 &1 Cor. 7:15).

    At this junction I'd like to pose a marital plight with which I'm personally acquainted. What you are about to read are the explicit, factual details of a marital relationship gone sour. Analyze this plight carefully, and then read my comments that follow.

    The man divorced his wife after almost 25 years of marriage. They both had an adequate income, especially the wife. The husband was a believer, and his wife was supposed to have been. After 25 years of a tumultuous marital relationship—arguing, feuding, fussing, fighting—she deserted him and moved out-of-state.

    He could never trust her to tell the truth. She was a chronic liar. She used him, manipulated him, and took him for everything she thought she could get by with, particularly money. Other than filing joint income tax returns for the first 15 years of their marriage, the only thing they had in common and experienced jointly was sexual intimacy. After 15 years of filing jointly, the husband discovered that his wife had been taking him for hundreds of dollars every time they filed income tax returns. Over that long period, she had manipulated him out of thousands of dollars. Filing jointly ended abruptly! When he discovered the loss, she refused to talk about it.

    Everything else was separate. They bought their groceries separately, stored them in separate food compartments, prepared their meals separately, ate separately, had separate bank accounts, charge accounts, and took turns putting out hand soap and toilet tissue. They did their laundry separately. When company came, the husband was responsible for providing all of the food if they were his family and relatives, and she supplied the food for her family and relatives. The wife would often inventory all of her food items prior to taking an out-of-town trip to make sure her husband didn't steal anything while she was gone!

    The husband tried desperately to improve the relationship. They mutually agreed to see a Christian marriage counselor. During each hour-long session, she told one lie after another. When she wasn't lying, she distorted the truth. Instead of the relationship improving as a result of counseling, it grew immensely worse. Finally the husband threw up his hands and informed his wife that he would never again step inside a marriage counselor's office with her. He told her that he would go separately, if necessary,  but not with her.

    On a Friday night, the two had a big argument and fight.  To regain his cool and composure, and to permit his wife to regain hers, he stayed the next two nights with local relatives. When he returned on Sunday morning, she had "cleaned him out"—everything but his twin bed, a 13 inch TV, and a microwave, including all of his personal items, and refused to return anything. A neighbor reported that she had hired three Hispanics who helped her load everything up during the night.  A few months later, the husband filed for and obtained a divorce. The rest is history.

    Tell me, will not God make allowances in cases like this? If not, why not? If Jesus approved of David and his men breaking God's law out of necessity (Matt. 12:3-4), why would He not approve of this man divorcing his spouse out of necessity, thus breaking God's law? And if God approves it, are they not free to remarry? They're no longer bound to their ex-spouse. They're now as free as they were before they married the first time.

    Under the Law of Moses, not even the Jewish priests were permitted to labor on the Sabbath. However, out of necessity God made allowances because the priests' duties entailed their working in the Temple on the Sabbath, their busiest day of the week, although they desecrated the day by thus doing. Yet they were innocent because of necessity. "Or haven't you read in the Law that on the Sabbath the priests in the temple desecrate the day and yet are innocent?" (Matt. 12:5).

    Jesus also reminded the Pharisees that if an ox or sheep falls into the ditch on the Sabbath and they rescue the animal out of mercy, they are innocent (Matt. 12:11). We see, then, that God makes concessions in cases of necessity and mercy. How could he do otherwise and be a merciful God?

    I could give you ample examples of other cases where marital relationships have failed miserably, although no adultery was committed. And I'm talking about couples who sought professional and spiritual help, yet one of the parties refused to change. God is not so legalistic that he is without mercy.

     Many of our traditional views on marriage, divorce, and remarriage "stinks to high heaven." The old orthodox positions are still placing a noose around the necks of divorced believers, thus prohibiting them from remarrying, in spite of the fact that heaven's testimony teaches that "it is better to marry than to burn with passion" (1 Cor. 7:9). Tell me, does God disapprove more of a divorced believer remarrying because of passion than he does if the same believer commits immorality because of his/her passion? Which is the lesser of the two evils, assuming both are evil? You tell me. Let's leave it where Paul left it.  "For it is better to marry than to burn
with passion."

—Buff.

[Sherman Nobles]

I believe in the "plain" text in the bible concerning marrage and divorce.

The problem with the "plain" text is that "A Text without a Context is a Pretext - an assumed meaning that often misses the author's intent!"  In other words, when you take a text out of context, the "plain" meaning is very often the "wrong" meaning! 

Paul encourages us to "Be diligent to present yourself approved to God, a worker who doesn't need to be ashamed, correctly teaching the word of truth." (2 Tim. 2:15).  You're welcome to stick to the simple "plain" text if you wish; or you can put the necessary work, research, study and prayer into the text to undestand what Jesus meant. 

The problem with so much acceptance to divorce in this day and age is; Social Acceptance of divorce.  Since society, accepts divorce, Christians tend to fall into the trap of what is right by God and what is acceptable in society.

Social acceptance of divorce is not nearly as problematic as the Church teaching errant doctrine on the issue.  For centuries, the church, instead of empowering people to have healthy marriages have instead tried to control people's lives and force people to stay married.  Has this approach worked?  Of course not, the divorce rate in the church is as high as that of non-Christians. 

The foundational traditional doctrine of marriage is that marriage is indissoluble, unbreakable which is completely unscriptural and irrational.  Marriage is breakable.  Jesus even noted that marriages joined together by God run the risk of being broken, torn apart by man.

Similar, today, homosexuals get offended, when Christians quote from the Bible and say that being Gay is a sin and damnation follows the unrepentant heart. So, they argue back and condem Christians for saying they are going to hell.

Likewise, since divorce is becoming a social norm, people are trying to justify their reasons for divorce. When in doubt, go to what the word of God says about it....then do not add anything to the Bible to suit your needs...And there is your answer.

A completely errant analogy!  How in the world can you compare homosexuality to divorce?  On one hand, homosexuality is repeatedly forbidden in scripture and is against nature itself.  On the other hand, many people suffer divorce though it is against their will.  Not only that, but God himself identifies with the pain of divorce, being a divorce' too! (Jer. 3:8).   

[Sherman Nobles]

Buff,

I appreciate the passion in your post.  Please let me point out though that divorce, in and of itself, is not necessarily sinful and is certainly not unlawful.  God inspired Moses to legislate the bill of divorce so as to bring a proper legal end to disfunctional relationships and to free expelled wives so that they could legally marry another man and not fear their first husband reclaiming them. 

I agree with you that the "traditional views on MDR stink to high heaven". 

[Corbley]

I believe in the "plain" text in the bible concerning marrage and divorce.

The problem with the "plain" text is that "A Text without a Context is a Pretext - an assumed meaning that often misses the author's intent!"  In other words, when you take a text out of context, the "plain" meaning is very often the "wrong" meaning! 
Absolutly, correct! Too much today is taken out of context. However, the "plain text" I refer to is in context. Those who take things out of context, tend to create various denominations. (i.e: babtist, methodist, Assemblies of God and so on)  There is only one Gospel of Jesus Christ. I believe that the denominational separation in our society has been a part of Satans plan to decieve (another debate)

Paul encourages us to "Be diligent to present yourself approved to God, a worker who doesn't need to be ashamed, correctly teaching the word of truth." (2 Tim. 2:15).  You're welcome to stick to the simple "plain" text if you wish; or you can put the necessary work, research, study and prayer into the text to undestand what Jesus meant. 
That is good advice....I do that very thing. Also, I would add, take no MAN's word as truth. But read the word to find truth. Even in divorce.

The problem with so much acceptance to divorce in this day and age is; Social Acceptance of divorce.  Since society, accepts divorce, Christians tend to fall into the trap of what is right by God and what is acceptable in society.

Social acceptance of divorce is not nearly as problematic as the Church teaching errant doctrine on the issue.  For centuries, the church, instead of empowering people to have healthy marriages have instead tried to control people's lives and force people to stay married.  Has this approach worked?  Of course not, the divorce rate in the church is as high as that of non-Christians. 
That is true, but I disagree that is is the Churches fault. Society, (Satan's world) has made divorce more socially acceptable and people now get divorced for far too many reasons NOT acceptabler to God.
For example: Ilove Lucy was a TV show when I was a kid. Ricky and Lucy had to have twin beds for any bedroom shots. Today we know that it is far less descreet. Likewise, divorce is becoming acceptable for more reasons. That doesn't make those reasons right by God but socially acceptable.  Divorce was low  just 50 years ago, BECAUSE the Churches spoke against it, there still was divorce because of adultry and abandonment.  Not because he snores too loud.

The foundational traditional doctrine of marriage is that marriage is indissoluble, unbreakable which is completely unscriptural and irrational.  Marriage is breakable.  Jesus even noted that marriages joined together by God run the risk of being broken, torn apart by man.
I do not think that the doctrine was as strict as you suggest, more than the empowerment of women. Women today are stronger in mind and self assure of themselves more than in the past.

Similar, today, homosexuals get offended, when Christians quote from the Bible and say that being Gay is a sin and damnation follows the unrepentant heart. So, they argue back and condem Christians for saying they are going to hell.

Likewise, since divorce is becoming a social norm, people are trying to justify their reasons for divorce. When in doubt, go to what the word of God says about it....then do not add anything to the Bible to suit your needs...And there is your answer.

A completely errant analogy!  How in the world can you compare homosexuality to divorce?  On one hand, homosexuality is repeatedly forbidden in scripture and is against nature itself.  On the other hand, many people suffer divorce though it is against their will.  Not only that, but God himself identifies with the pain of divorce, being a divorce' too! (Jer. 3:8).   

I dont think it is, it is a socially acceptable sin. Just like divorce is a socially acceptable sin.  (If divorce is not according to scripture) If not, if divorce is because of argueing over bills. Then it becomes a sin.  Use any analogy you choose, there are many in our society. Sin is sin, and divorce for the wrong reason is a sin that a person should repent from. And understand that it is a sin (if done for the wrong reasons)

[Bonnie]

Buff, what I see is a lot of stroking and tickling of the ears going on.  A lot of what satisfies the flesh regardless of what the Word of God says.  Of course people are going to go for this.  Things have been going down hill for a long time within the church.  Watered down gospel most of us talk about from time to time but when we see it we don't seem to recognize it.

We admit we must give our will to God and our very lives. We know we'll have to make sacrifices for the sake of the Gospel but when do we think these things are done or how are they done or when will they be done.

Moses could have had a life of leisure, a palace to live in and servants at his beckon call.  Had he just changed the call from God.  Had he decided to figure out another way to do God's bidding.

What if he had decided he could do the Hebrews more good if he remained where he was.  After all he was the next in line to rule the Egyptians.  He could have decided I'll make it easier on them, give them less work to do, etc.  But he didn't.  He was obedient.

If we expect Christians to be Christians we need leaders who will return to the Word, preach it and live it.

God gave us commands on His will for us and marriage.  We should stop expecting this life to be all it can be and realize we are here as pilgrims and strangers with a great calling from on high.  Everything else takes a back seat to it.

Mark 8:35  "For whosoever will save his life shall lose it; but whosoever shall lose his life for my sake and the gospel's, the same shall save it."

God Bless

[Sherman Nobles]

I dont think it is, it is a socially acceptable sin. Just like divorce is a socially acceptable sin.  (If divorce is not according to scripture) If not, if divorce is because of argueing over bills. Then it becomes a sin.  Use any analogy you choose, there are many in our society. Sin is sin, and divorce for the wrong reason is a sin that a person should repent from. And understand that it is a sin (if done for the wrong reasons)

I agree that divorce for the wrong reason is sin, but you did not qualify your previous statement with "for the wrong reason".  You just made the general statement that divorce is sin.

Sadly, the church has so spiritualized marriage, that it's lost the practical aspects of marriage.  Marriage is a human covenant; and covenants have both stated and implied expectations.  Many marriages end in divorce because spouses fail to keep their part of the covenant of mariage.

And btw, scripture does not explicity lay out acceptable and non-acceptable reasons for divorce.  The Jews did have two categories of divorce, those based on commonly accepted moral reasons for divorce and those based on completely selfish reasons.  Selfish divorces were called "hateful divorces."  These hateful divorces are the ones mentioned in Mal. 2:16.  Unfortunately, this scripture is commonly translated as God saying "I hate divorce".  It would be better translated as God rebuking them for the "hateful divorce." 

  Ultimately divorce is the result of the hardness of heart, however that is expressed.  But God is the only one who really knows what goes on between a husband and wife and who is to blame. 

[cristals mama]

I dont think it is, it is a socially acceptable sin. Just like divorce is a socially acceptable sin.  (If divorce is not according to scripture) If not, if divorce is because of argueing over bills. Then it becomes a sin.  Use any analogy you choose, there are many in our society. Sin is sin, and divorce for the wrong reason is a sin that a person should repent from. And understand that it is a sin (if done for the wrong reasons)

I agree that divorce for the wrong reason is sin, but you did not qualify your previous statement with "for the wrong reason".  You just made the general statement that divorce is sin.

Sadly, the church has so spiritualized marriage, that it's lost the practical aspects of marriage.  Marriage is a human covenant; and covenants have both stated and implied expectations.  Many marriages end in divorce because spouses fail to keep their part of the covenant of mariage.

And btw, scripture does not explicity lay out acceptable and non-acceptable reasons for divorce.  The Jews did have two categories of divorce, those based on commonly accepted moral reasons for divorce and those based on completely selfish reasons.  Selfish divorces were called "hateful divorces."  These hateful divorces are the ones mentioned in Mal. 2:16.  Unfortunately, this scripture is commonly translated as God saying "I hate divorce".  It would be better translated as God rebuking them for the "hateful divorce." 

  Ultimately divorce is the result of the hardness of heart, however that is expressed.  But God is the only one who really knows what goes on between a husband and wife and who is to blame. 

Everyone picks the 1st words of verse 16 and discards the rest-  verse 13 has happened before there was a divorce and the partner by his/her actions has already broken the marriage covenant (faith with her) at this point and a God of love is not going to place continual punishment and shame on the partner who did not do the breaking but instead was broken by their spouse.  There may be frivolous divorces going on by some, but there are also those who have good reason and deserve the love/understanding and absence of judgement by those who have not been in their shoes-  God gives it why can't you, it is not for you to judge but only for God!  I find it sad that Christians will view everything people can do as forgivable and redeemable no matter how extreme even unto murder, but they call for eternal and continual punishment for someone who may have already been punished for years in a place that was supposed to be one of safety, security and unconditional acceptance.  So those who have already gone through so much pain are told that they now should be isolated and are not deserving of a true chance at genuine love.  Love as Christ loves the church!

It is ashame that there are so many Christians that are more self righteous and judgemental then the cruel world and because of this in order to get the help they need Christians in a situation such as is above have to turn to the world for the help and support they need because the church does nothing but condemn them.  Remember Jesus even said to the woman caught in adultery (by the way I wonder where the man was?) "neither do I condemn you".

Malachi 2:13-16
13 Another thing you do: You flood the LORD's altar with tears. You weep and wail because he no longer pays attention to your offerings or accepts them with pleasure from your hands.14You ask, "Why?