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When should I tell my new girlfriend about my son and that I am divorced?

Started by topman, Thu Oct 18, 2012 - 09:38:16

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chosenone

Why do you say she deseves more? My husband and I have the marriage of our dreams, and we are both previously divorced (for Biblical reasons).After 7 years of marriage, after God bought us together, we just go from strength to strength. ::smile::
If you are the right man for her it will happen, and if you arent then it wont.

topman

Quote from: chosenone on Mon Oct 22, 2012 - 10:05:50
Why do you say she deseves more? My husband and I have the marriage of our dreams, and we are both previously divorced (for Biblical reasons).After 7 years of marriage, after God bought us together, we just go from strength to strength. ::smile::
If you are the right man for her it will happen, and if you arent then it wont.

Good question - I actually went back to think about it - and you know what I think I get it now, I want to give her that special relationship you are taking about. That's what she deserves and can only be acheived by putting God first and understanding her needs. Well, all seems well now - we're chatting and having laughs again, so I can only be thankful.

chosenone

Quote from: topman on Tue Oct 23, 2012 - 04:17:36
Quote from: chosenone on Mon Oct 22, 2012 - 10:05:50
Why do you say she deseves more? My husband and I have the marriage of our dreams, and we are both previously divorced (for Biblical reasons).After 7 years of marriage, after God bought us together, we just go from strength to strength. ::smile::
If you are the right man for her it will happen, and if you arent then it wont.

Good question - I actually went back to think about it - and you know what I think I get it now, I want to give her that special relationship you are taking about. That's what she deserves and can only be acheived by putting God first and understanding her needs. Well, all seems well now - we're chatting and having laughs again, so I can only be thankful.
Brilliant topman ::smile::

Wycliffes_Shillelagh

No need for fear and apprehension.  Just bring it up casually.  Ask her if she's ever been married, then tell her that you were when she reciprocates the question.


Jarrod

topman

Okay a further update:
Okay so last Saturday night went well and we talked more. Last night we talked some more and she is still worried about our future and my link to my ex (through my son) and not sure how she'll cope. She doesnt want to lose me and sees me more than a friend. I told her I didnt want to lose her friendship either and for us to take things slow and build our friendship more from there as we get to know each other a little more and let God just lead us. 
She seemed to respond to that and we are going out again on Saturday to watch fireworks with my friends. We got a little physical last Saturday (i.e. holding hands and a couple of small kisses) - maybe I should not have done that? She says she is comfotable with me and we have connections on so many levels. I'm just confused that maybe the thing I need to do is let her go even if I care so much for her.  I am prepared to take things slow and in time she will see that there is little to be concerned about. I'm just a little confused.

chosenone

Really topman, it is her decision.  If she feels that she will struggle to cope with the ex and the contact about your son and all that will entail, then she needs to pray about that and decide if that means she will withdraw. You can't make that decision for her. Obviously it will get harder the longer you go out if she does end it, but thats the risk you have to take I suppose.

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