relationship problem

[sunnysprklng]

hi dis is sunny, i am down n out  ,  i dont know what should i do! pls help me out, i am in love with a girl and she too loves me, we met each other 3 months ago we liked each other at very first sight! and she is my relative too, we exchanged phone no.s :) and everything was fine, one day while talking i came to know that she is very younger to me , she is 9 to 10 years younger to me! i was shocked! but its very late! now i cant live without her,... sure! i cant concentrate on anything! if she goes away its the end of my world , she understands me she's too good ... pls help me! what should i do...

[geneh_33]

hi dis is sunny, i am down n out  ,  i dont know what should i do! pls help me out, i am in love with a girl and she too loves me, we met each other 3 months ago we liked each other at very first sight! and she is my relative too, we exchanged phone no.s :) and everything was fine, one day while talking i came to know that she is very younger to me , she is 9 to 10 years younger to me! i was shocked! but its very late! now i cant live without her,... sure! i cant concentrate on anything! if she goes away its the end of my world , she understands me she's too good ... pls help me! what should i do...

I would advise spending some time alone with God in prayer. If you are a believer God is working for good in your life, you can know that much.

[DaveW]

First off - Welcome to these forums.

Second - go to the Introductions section and tell us a bit about yourself.

Third - Geneh is correct.  You need to spend some serious time in prayer and seeking God.

Are you a believer?
Are you in a congregation?
Is the girl a believer?
Is she in a congregation?
How old are you?
How close a relative is this girl?

[chosenone]

hi dis is sunny, i am down n out  ,  i dont know what should i do! pls help me out, i am in love with a girl and she too loves me, we met each other 3 months ago we liked each other at very first sight! and she is my relative too, we exchanged phone no.s :) and everything was fine, one day while talking i came to know that she is very younger to me , she is 9 to 10 years younger to me! i was shocked! but its very late! now i cant live without her,... sure! i cant concentrate on anything! if she goes away its the end of my world , she understands me she's too good ... pls help me! what should i do...

Hi
What relative is she to you and how old are you both? Are you Christians?

[sunnysprklng]

i am a christian and she is too, and we regularly go to a church, and she is relative thats not a problem, i am 29 and she is 20, i believe in Jesus , ya i need Gods help

[chosenone]

i am a christian and she is too, and we regularly go to a church, and she is relative thats not a problem, i am 29 and she is 20, i believe in Jesus , ya i need Gods help

Hi Sunny

You are both grown adults so I cant see why the age gap makes any difference. Many people have relationships with people who are quite a bit older or younger than them. I wouldn't let it worry you and just enjoy God and enjoy getting to know each other.  Now if you were 25 and she was 15 then that would be very different because she would still be a child.   

[DaveW]

You are both grown adults so I cant see why the age gap makes any difference. Many people have relationships with people who are quite a bit older or younger than them. I wouldn't let it worry you and just enjoy God and enjoy getting to know each other.  Now if you were 25 and she was 15 then that would be very different because she would still be a child.

I agree with chosen. 

But Sunny - you did not answer how close a relative she is. 
If she is first cousin (one grandparent in common) or closer you may have legal trouble in getting married, depending on what state you live in.

First cousin marriage is prohibited in these states:

Arkansas
Delaware
Idaho
Iowa
Kansas
Kentucky
Louisiana
Michigan
Minnesota
Mississippi
Missouri
Montana
Nebraska
Nevada
New Hampshire
North Dakota
Ohio
Oklahoma
Oregon
Pennsylvania
South Dakota
Texas
Washington
West Virginia
Wyoming

Check your state's laws if you are in another state.

[sunnysprklng]

she is'nt my close relative, thanq , i don't  do anything against God

[chosenone]

she is'nt my close relative, thanq , i don't  do anything against God

What relative is she? Cousin? Niece? Second cousin?

[sunnysprklng]

ok! she is  my grand pa's sister's daughters daughter 

[geneh_33]

How is the relationship with her now? Has anything changed since your first post?

She is too distant a relative for it to be a legal issue of any kind. And the Bible does not forbid marriage based on how you are genetically related.

[chosenone]

How is the relationship with her now? Has anything changed since your first post?

She is too distant a relative for it to be a legal issue of any kind. And the Bible does not forbid marriage based on how you are genetically related.

Except for close family.

[winsome]

i am a christian and she is too, and we regularly go to a church, and she is relative thats not a problem, i am 29 and she is 20, i believe in Jesus , ya i need Gods help

Hi Sunny

You are both grown adults so I cant see why the age gap makes any difference. Many people have relationships with people who are quite a bit older or younger than them. I wouldn't let it worry you and just enjoy God and enjoy getting to know each other.  Now if you were 25 and she was 15 then that would be very different because she would still be a child.   

I agree age should not be an issue. My wife's parents had 10 years between them and they had over 50 years of happy marriage.

[chosenone]

i am a christian and she is too, and we regularly go to a church, and she is relative thats not a problem, i am 29 and she is 20, i believe in Jesus , ya i need Gods help

Hi Sunny

You are both grown adults so I cant see why the age gap makes any difference. Many people have relationships with people who are quite a bit older or younger than them. I wouldn't let it worry you and just enjoy God and enjoy getting to know each other.  Now if you were 25 and she was 15 then that would be very different because she would still be a child.   

I agree age should not be an issue. My wife's parents had 10 years between them and they had over 50 years of happy marriage.

My dad and step mum had 24 years between them, but I would NEVER recommend that. She was left a widow with a young child in her 40's.

[geneh_33]

How is the relationship with her now? Has anything changed since your first post?

She is too distant a relative for it to be a legal issue of any kind. And the Bible does not forbid marriage based on how you are genetically related.

Except for close family.

How so? That is what, second or third cousin? There is no scripture barring that.

[chosenone]

How is the relationship with her now? Has anything changed since your first post?

She is too distant a relative for it to be a legal issue of any kind. And the Bible does not forbid marriage based on how you are genetically related.

Except for close family.

How so? That is what, second or third cousin? There is no scripture barring that.

Parents, children, brothers, sisters. grandparents, grandchildren etc
Second cousins aren't close family.

[DaveW]

ok! she is  my grand pa's sister's daughters daughter

That would be Second Cousin. (one great-grandparent in common)

[DaveW]

How so? That is what, second or third cousin? There is no scripture barring that.

Scripture does not bar first cousins either (common grandparent) but many states do.

Biblically the lists of prohibited marriage partners are found in Leviticus 18 and 20, with some additions in Deuteronomy.

[geneh_33]

How so? That is what, second or third cousin? There is no scripture barring that.

Scripture does not bar first cousins either (common grandparent) but many states do.

Biblically the lists of prohibited marriage partners are found in Leviticus 18 and 20, with some additions in Deuteronomy.

Thanks for clarifying that. I wasn't sure about first cousins but I figured sunnysprklng was good to go on that anyway because that's not his first cousin.