What attracts people to pornography? And has anyone here struggled with it?

[crf_stewarje]

I have never been into pornography, but my question, is what attracts people to it?  Honestly, I am actually afraid of pornography, because I know that curiosity, or even accidental viewing, can lead to a downfall.  I've had instances where I've been accused of looking at porn, when it was actually someone close to me who was doing the viewing.     

[Jason_NC]

I struggled with porn for over 30 years.  It started when I was a kid.  It got its claws in me early, and cost me one marriage and almost another.  As to why it is appealing, for one, I am a very visual person.  Two, it "offers" power and control.  You can please yourself without worrying about having to please another.  But it is also very deceiving.  It changes your brain chemistry, and your expectations in relationships.

In the immortal words of Admiral Akbar, it's a trap!  You are wise to avoid it and I recommend you continue to do so.

[tacdon]

OP-  You must be blessed, give God the praise!

[crf_stewarje]

True.  Millions of people look at pornography; thank God I don't.

[geneh_33]

I have never been into pornography, but my question, is what attracts people to it?  Honestly, I am actually afraid of pornography, because I know that curiosity, or even accidental viewing, can lead to a downfall.  I've had instances where I've been accused of looking at porn, when it was actually someone close to me who was doing the viewing.   

Surely you do understand what attracts men to it, don't you?

[crf_stewarje]

Obviously not.  Otherwise, I wouldn't have been asking.

[DaveW]

Obviously not.  Otherwise, I wouldn't have been asking.

I do not know what your experience with sex is, but most people find it very pleasurable.  As it was designed by God to bring people together, doing it solo (masturbating) can be a less-than-satisfying experience.  Some find that fantasy will help with that but it can get to be hard work and boring if you lack imagination.  That is where porn comes in.  It provides visual stimulation, an always ready for action sex partner (or many partners) and it is all designed to increase the viewers' satisfaction.

That is why it is so popular.  And since the brain re-wires those pleasure circuits with every intense experience, it can become very addictive.  IOW, once the brain has been wired to respond that way, you need those images to get off. (and you will need to get off a LOT)

[JohnDB]

I struggled with porn for over 30 years.  It started when I was a kid.  It got its claws in me early, and cost me one marriage and almost another.  As to why it is appealing, for one, I am a very visual person.  Two, it "offers" power and control.  You can please yourself without worrying about having to please another.  But it is also very deceiving.  It changes your brain chemistry, and your expectations in relationships.

In the immortal words of Admiral Akbar, it's a trap!  You are wise to avoid it and I recommend you continue to do so.

If I remember right...Princess Leah said the same words too. 

[Culsey]

Obviously not.  Otherwise, I wouldn't have been asking.

You are the first man to admit that I know of.

And yes it is a trap. It catches to many.

[MetalMario]

I'm 30 years old, and a virgin. What else am I supposed to do?

[Culsey]

Mario you need to pray about it continually. Dont get caught in this horrible trap! Paul said we should marry rather than commit sexual sin.

[MetalMario]

I'd love to get married. Too bad it'll probably never happen.

[Culsey]

I'd love to get married. Too bad it'll probably never happen.

Why do you say that? Women look for a man with a degree of confidence. This could be your problem.

[MetalMario]

Let's also remember that it was much easier to get married in Paul's time than it is today. All you had to do was wait until your fifteenth birthday, and then the village matchmaker would set you up with someone, and then you could go home and satisfy your carnal lusts.

I'm not saying that God's law changes. I know it doesn't. But courtship and marriage today are something that Paul would never recognize. The whole reason porn even exists is because of people like me who can't meet women and can't get married, even though they want to.

[Culsey]

Let's also remember that it was much easier to get married in Paul's time than it is today. All you had to do was wait until your fifteenth birthday, and then the village matchmaker would set you up with someone, and then you could go home and satisfy your carnal lusts.

I'm not saying that God's law changes. I know it doesn't. But courtship and marriage today are something that Paul would never recognize. The whole reason porn even exists is because of people like me who can't meet women and can't get married, even though they want to.

I will pray for you brother for the temptation to sin is great for a single man. God be with you and peace.

[MetalMario]

Thank you. I appreciate that.

Y'know, not too long ago, I did try to swear off porn. Tried really hard, even to the point where I went to bed frustrated. I lasted about a week. :(

[Culsey]

Thank you. I appreciate that.

Y'know, not too long ago, I did try to swear off porn. Tried really hard, even to the point where I went to bed frustrated. I lasted about a week. :(

Do you have a pastor, priest or Christian counsellor to talk to about it? That would help to get another Christian involved that has experience in dealing with the problem.

[MetalMario]

Perhaps. I've already decided that I'm going to give it another shot. Gonna be a real son of a b, though, like quitting cigarettes cold turkey.

[Culsey]

Perhaps. I've already decided that I'm going to give it another shot. Gonna be a real son of a b, though, like quitting cigarettes cold turkey.

Hang in there bro and fight the good fight of Paul. You can do all things through Christ who strengthens you. It may take some time and some disappointments but you can do it with the help of the holy spirit. Don't give up on Christ and keep on laying it aside until you are finally rid of it altogether. Again - don't ever give up!

[epiphanius]

Perhaps. I've already decided that I'm going to give it another shot. Gonna be a real son of a b, though, like quitting cigarettes cold turkey.

Metal,

Here's another vote for you to hang in there!  Please don't get discouraged if you have to keep trying again and again.  Rather, be attentive to what God is telling you each time you struggle, and you will start to learn something each time that will be helpful for the next encounter.

It may also help to keep in mind that what you're watching is a carefully concocted fantasy, targeting a weak point in the male psyche so as to make it progressively weaker.

[CrowRules]

I struggle with watching pornography, the attraction is the visual stimulation you get from seeing a sexy woman on your television screen or computer monitor. I continue to try and break free of the addiction, it is not easy.

[MetalMario]

Well, it's been nine days since I resolved to give up pornography. I'm still holding to it, but I'm really feeling the itch. I'll continue to do my best to call upon the reserves of strength God sends me. After all, there are people in more dangerous parts of the world who are giving up their possessions, their families, and their very lives, so I've got no business calling myself a Christian if I can't give up pornography.

It really is a son of a b, though.

[DaveW]

Metal - I would like to suggest a book to you.  IT is "Soul Virgins" by Dr. Doug Rosenau and Michael Todd Wilson.  It will give you a better perspective dealing with those desires.

http://www.amazon.com/Soul-Virgins-Redefining-Single-Sexuality/dp/080106600X

[Wycliffes_Shillelagh]

Well, I think one of the keys is understanding that you're not supposed to fight your way through it.

The Bible says we should "flee temptation," not sit there and bear it in order to build up some kind of tolerance.

So, if you get "the itch" the best thing to do is probably to shut off the computer and go find something to do that occupies your mind with something else.  (I think the fridge needs to be cleaned out.)

Jarrod

[Mere Nick]

What Wycliffe's Whup Stick said.

I like ice cold beer and hot pizza.  I wonder why folks don't watch movies of folks drinking beer and eating pizza?