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Here are a few simple rules that I have learned from my many years of dating...For those rather new or just getting started again into the Dating Scene these rules are going to be invaluable for how to behave.



1) Do not give your date a wedgie. (Otherwise known as a Melvin) For some reason girls do not find any humor in it...especially if it is a first date scenario.

2) Remember her name. Remembering her mother's name won't help...remembering her father's shotgun's pet name may keep you from getting in a compromising situation with this girl but it won't score you any points with getting a second date with this girl.

3) Never say, "My last girlfriend was a lot prettier than you but you have a better personality." She will never hear the compliment in your statement. Always telling the truth does not mean that you have to tell everything.

4)Do not play any game with her at any time...and we aren't talking emotional games only...the list includes scrabble, monopoly, electronic or otherwise. If you lose you will lose and even if you win you will still lose.

 

But wedgies crack me up! 

Here's another one for ya that I learned the hard way--

"If the person you are dating starts telling you how much they love/adore/value you as a girlfriend (or boyfriend), do not get all deer in the headlights and start rambling on about how much yardage Willie Parker gained in the Steelers game earlier.  This will go badly for you."

You're allowed to date anyone you want.

You don't have to have children with them.

Make sure you her original intention and translate correctly.

We have the case I just read about in my e-mail. There were some monks who were devotedly staying pure and making sure they read their Bibles. Then, one day, they were talking about how they got the directive to be celibates. 

Who came up with it

Well, the head guy went in the cave where they kept their original manuscripts of church directions. And he was in there, quite a long time, did not even come out. So, they went in after him. He was there bloodily banging his head against the wall . . . holding the paper on which the policy for marriage was posted, moaning and 

groaning how they had not translated the "r" from the original directive.

A "melvin" is not a classic wedgie.  A "melvin" is a front wedgie.

 the  whole list makes me laugh   

I like that we can as adults discuss the various forms of wedgies, from classical to the more rare "Melvin"